National Humor Month Funny Short Joke Number Fourteen

National Humor Month Funny Short Joke Number Fourteen

Didja hear the one about the traveling salesman and the farmer’s daughter? Of course you did. Jokes on that subject are battalion, I mean, legion. Here is one of my personal favorites rated PG.

Funny Joke Number Fourteen

A doctor is making his rounds in the hospital and meets Mr. Smith, a patient who was brought in with a broken leg.

Doctor – “Mr. Smith, can you tell me how you happened to break your leg this morning?”

Mr. Smith – “How do you do, doctor. Well, it was like this. Twenty years ago I was a 25-year old salesman on the road, traveling from town to town, selling housewares. One night I had to take a detour, it was late in the evening, very dark, and I lost my way . . .”

Doctor (interrupting) “Forget that, I don’t have time for all that. Just tell me how you broke your leg this morning.”

Mr. Smith – Well, twenty years ago, I was on the road and it got dark. I was lost and needed a place to stay for the night. No Motel Six around (laughs) – it really was only $6 a night in those days. Can you believe it? Anyway, I saw a light in this old farmhouse about 100 yards from the road.

I knocked on the door and the farmer answered. I explained my situation and he was very pleasant and accommodating. He said he could put me up for the night but he only had two bedrooms – one for him and his wife and one for his beautiful daughter. He asked would I mind sharing the room with her.

“Not at all,” I said. I went upstairs to the room and was very quiet while I got undressed because she was already asleep. I was dead tired, crawled into bed and fell asleep almost immediately.

About midnight, I felt her gently shaking my shoulder to wake me up. She asked me, “Is there anything you want?”

I said, No, everything was fine I told her.

She said, “Are you absolutely certain? Are you sure?”

I said, I’m sure.

Then she said, “Isn’t there anything at all I can do for you? Anything at all?”

And I said, I reckon not. And went back to sleep.

Doctor – “Would you please explain what does all this have to do with your broken leg?”

Mr. Smith– “Well, this morning I had to adjust my television aerial, and suddenly . . . out of nowhere . . . it dawned on me what she meant. I fell off the roof!”

Funny Quote

”I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.” – George Carlin

© Copyright BJ Rakow, Ph.D. 2012. All rights reserved. Author, "Much of What You Know about Job Search Just Ain't So"

My favorite 'Carlin' routine

Remember Crystal? from 'American Idol'?

More by this Author


Comments for National Humor Month Funny Short Joke Number Fourteen 54 comments

ithabise profile image

ithabise 4 years ago from Winston-Salem, NC

In some folk's minds Mr. Smith deserved his broken leg!


Becky Katz profile image

Becky Katz 4 years ago from Hereford, AZ

Funny, now to go to thirteen, I missed it somehow.


Wayne Brown profile image

Wayne Brown 4 years ago from Texas

That's a good one, Doc....that would be me in that example....a day late, a dollar short. At the same time, had I taken her up on it, my leg would have probably been broken 25 years earlier by the farmer. LOL! WB


mary615 profile image

mary615 4 years ago from Florida

Pretty funny, girl! I loved George Carlin...he was great. Keep 'em coming....


ipad tablet pc profile image

ipad tablet pc 4 years ago from UK

did you see the look and did you hear the sound of that- quite a joke. It's funny indeed. However, she is the only one who got to laugh. A joke ought to be shared by at least two people- one with the broken leg and arm and all wrapped up like an Egyptian mummy and the 'culprit'. This is a good laugh but i don't envy that guy/man in any way.


Pamela99 profile image

Pamela99 4 years ago from United States

Funny! Boy that man was slow witted. Love your jokes.


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

That may be true, ithabise, but aren't you condemning Mr. Smith for what he did NOT do. He's the INJURED, you'll pardon the expression, party.


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

Thanks for the 'funny,' Becky. Now hurry, number thirteen is anxiously waiting for you. Enjoy!


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

You make a good point, Wayne, but I know you're just joshin'. Don't think you have ever been a day late, a dollar short anytime - if you can help it. Thanks for the LOL - think I heard it over here.


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

Thanks for the 'pretty funny,' mary - much better than 'ugly funny' any time. Just jokin'. I am a George Carlin fan, too, miss him. My goal is 20 short funny jokes - then on to other stuff.


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

Nice to meet you ipad tablet pc. Didn't we meet in the Apple store? You are right - a good joke should be shared between two people - like you and me. Correct? Thanks for having a good laugh, even if I had to use a broken leg to evoke it.


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

Yes, Pamela, Mr. Smith did not have his wits about him that night. Thanks for the funny, m'dear, and loving my jokes some of which are almost as old as me. Almost, that is.


christopheranton profile image

christopheranton 4 years ago from Gillingham Kent. United Kingdom

That was another good one. I will watch the videos in the morning. I expect to get some more great laughs.

Thanks.


John Sarkis profile image

John Sarkis 4 years ago from Los Angeles, CA

Very funny drbj! Hey, we all remember those moments when we were young and someone offered us "comfort" and we refused. Those moments hunt us for the rest of our lives...LOL

Loved it and voted up

John


always exploring profile image

always exploring 4 years ago from Southern Illinois

Talk about dumb..Whoo Hoo, Funny and i love George Carlin. Keep 'em coming....


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

Thanks for stopping by, christopher. Enjoy the videos. The Carlin 'stuff' video is one of my favorites. I think you'll like it, too.


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

Thanks for the 'very funny,' John. How discreet you are to label the young lady's offer as 'comfort.' You do have a way with words. Thanks also for loving this and the Up. Delighted you enjoyed it.


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

I admit, Ruby, Mr. Smith was a dim bulb that night. Guess his porch light wasn't lit! Nice to know so many folks enjoy Carlin's humor. Enjoy the videos, m'luv.


Feline Prophet profile image

Feline Prophet 4 years ago from India

Haha...such a rude awakening!


Rosemay50 profile image

Rosemay50 4 years ago from Hawkes Bay - NewZealand

Haha that took a long time for the penny to drop and when it did so did he Lol.

Loved both Carlin and Crystals videos. A great all round entertaing hub. Thanks Doc


Eiddwen profile image

Eiddwen 4 years ago from Wales

Oh yes ye syes keep them coming drbj;I have saved every single one of these. Where would we be without humour??? I never want to find out ha ha ha!!

Take care my dear friend and enjoy your day.

Eddy.


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

A rude awakening indeed, Feline. Mr. Smith would have been better off if he just gently struck his forehead with his palm. Gently, that is! Thanks for the ha-ha, m'dear.


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

Very witty, Rosemary, it 'took a long time for the penny to drop and when it did so did he.' Thanks for being entertained by both Mr. Smith and the videos, m'dear. It was entirely my pleasure.


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

Hi, Eddy. I'll try to publish at least 20 of these jokes ... for now. Have to keep Dai laughing, right? I do agree with you. If we cannot laugh, we are lost!


50 Caliber profile image

50 Caliber 4 years ago from Arizona

Great fun here! The stuff by Carlin is way funny I think Sunnie Day might get some laughs as she moves her stuff and her husbands sh*t, lol. He was a funny guy, heavy on language but funny nonetheless.(I have days of heavy language, so not tossing stones)

Blessings

dusty


The Frog Prince profile image

The Frog Prince 4 years ago from Arlington, TX

Doc - I have to comment on Wayne's comment. The first time I met him out here in Texas he looked like he'd been in a telephone booth with a wild cat. I'll let him tell you the rest if he ever wants to but what he said must be true.

The Frog


amillar profile image

amillar 4 years ago from Scotland, UK

I think he was a bit slow-witted drbj, or he'd have remembered to wear a harness on that roof. I enjoyed the George Carlin clip BTW.


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 4 years ago

Laughing in the middle of the day feels really good. Thanks!


Green Lotus profile image

Green Lotus 4 years ago from Atlanta, GA

Sometimes I wish I had a set of drums and symbols so I could play 'ba dum ta dum' after each of your jokes.Cheers.


Paradise7 profile image

Paradise7 4 years ago from Upstate New York

LOL! Both at the joke and the GC routine. I love that thing on stuff.


AliciaC profile image

AliciaC 4 years ago from British Columbia, Canada

Very funny once again, drbj! I love the fact that you come up with a new joke hub every day! I'll be sure to check out the ones that I've somehow missed - I love the entertainment.


John MacNab profile image

John MacNab 4 years ago from the banks of the St. Lawrence

Sigh! I know how he felt drbj. Sometimes it is difficult to believe that you are being invited to do something you've been daydreaming over - and then, just as it dawns on you, her husband walks in. Life's like that.


Alastar Packer profile image

Alastar Packer 4 years ago from North Carolina

Wowee- Mr Smith's a slow one and I dare say deserved to fall off the roof for disappointing the fair maiden. Something similar happened here once and though I stayed a good boy it didn't take years to figure out what the lady was offering!


MartieCoetser profile image

MartieCoetser 4 years ago from South Africa

They say at the end we don't regret what we have done, but what we have not done...

I LOVE Carlin's shows :)

Thanks, drbj, I enjoy your funny short jokes sincerely :)


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

Hi, dusty, we both have Carlin in common. True, as you say, he used a lot of heavy language at times, but still was perceptively funny.

Have to check with Sunnie on that $h!t-movin' stuff. Thanks for finding 'great fun' here. Blessings backatcha.


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

Hi, Jim. When you met Wayne he 'looked like he'd been in a telephone booth with a wild cat?' Man, I have to hear the rest of that story. Had to be the result of a wild bronc buckin' - right, Wayne?


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

Hi, Amillar. You are so right. Mr. Smith should have worn a harness or other protective device on that roof. He probably thought fixing the aerial was such a cinch, it would only take a few minutes. Betcha he won't soon forget that.

Happy to see you enjoyed the Carlin clip, too.


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

Yup, laughing any time of the day feels good, bp. Happy I caught you in the middle of the day with this one. My pleasure, m'dear.


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

Hi, Hilary, what a unique and lovable comment - wishing you ... "had a set of drums and symbols to play 'ba dum ta dum' after each of my jokes." You ARE a sweetiepie. Thank you, m'luv. Cheers to you, too.


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

We both love Carlin and his 'stuff' video, Paradise. It's one of my favorites. Thank you for also laughing at the joke.


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

Thanks, Alicia, for finding this one funny. Yes, please do check out the others; you'll enjoy them, too. Trust me. We have much in common. You love the entertainment, and I love entertaining you!


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

Oh, pore John. What an interesting life you must lead. I surmised that while reading between the lines of your comment. Be careful, m'dear. Sometimes the hubby tiptoes in.


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

I believe, Alastar, that our Mr. Smith may have been more dead-tired that night 20 years ago than slow-thinking. But he didn't deserve his painful fate. So you, too, were a good boy in a similar situation? Shall I offer Congratulations! or Consolations!


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

What a very true statement that is, Martie. At the end, we may regret more what we have NOT done. Which for me, just emphasizes all the more how important it is to remind those we love that we care for them as often as possible. I enjoy George Carlin's work, too. And hanks for enjoying my funny jokes.

BTW, have I told you lately how much I enjoy your visits. Trust me.


Sunshine625 profile image

Sunshine625 4 years ago from Orlando, FL

I didn't see that ending coming!! Good one!! LOL

Crystal Bowersox...what a nice surprise! I'm a fan of hers, George Carlin's and yours! Three treats in one hub!! Thank you!:)


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

Hi, Linda, delighted I could surprise you, m'dear, with the ending. Thanks for enjoying the joke and the videos. Now how did I know that you were a fan of Crystal, George and me?

Must have been that old-fashioned, supernatural skill of E.S.P. :)


nemanjaboskov profile image

nemanjaboskov 4 years ago from Serbia

Talk about being slow :) 20 years :) Just fantastic!


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

Fantastic? nemanja? So are you with your comments. Thank you!


Sunshine625 profile image

Sunshine625 4 years ago from Orlando, FL

E.S.P works for me!:)


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

So does your writing talent, m'luv. Trust me.


John MacNab profile image

John MacNab 3 years ago from the banks of the St. Lawrence

Magical. I especially liked Crystal's song. The joke I was expecting to be something else, so you fooled me there. Thank you, drbj.


drbj profile image

drbj 3 years ago from south Florida Author

Yes, John, Crystal's rendition is magical. So I gotcha with the joke, my friend? You made my day. The pleasure is mine, believe me.


KoffeeKlatch Gals profile image

KoffeeKlatch Gals 3 years ago from Sunny Florida

I think he was a tad slow on the uptake. Funny stuff, Up and funny.


drbj profile image

drbj 3 years ago from south Florida Author

Yes, KKGals, he was a tad slow - about 25 years slow to be exact. But he paid the price, didn't he? Thanks for the visit, m'dear, and the Up and the funny. Appreciate your visits, y'know.

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