Like a storyteller

The last few months have been an interesting and strange experience for me, one that I never really thought I'd be able to complete, but at the same time one where I passed a point of 'no return' and was enjoying the ride so much that I just had to see it through even though if I tell the truth I had absolutely no idea where I was going (metaphorically) and no idea how I was going to get there!

The last few months I set out to do something that I'd wanted to for years, but every time I got so far and things just 'fell by the wayside' as it were and the project never got finished, ever have that experience?

I've got to tell you I really hate to start things and not finish them! But one thing I hate more is getting half way through and finding the roadblocks that I just can't get round! No matter what I tried I just could not find a way round these roadblocks and they seemed pretty huge to me!

I can hear the gears whirring in your minds, what the heck is Lawrence on about? what the heck is he talking about?

The truth is I've wanted to write a novel for years, I've tried a few times and got so far but then things would 'grind to halt' as I thought about all the rejection letters waiting for me when I sent my manuscript to the agents, I thought about all the other writers wanting to be the next 'Tom Clancy' or 'Geoffrey Archer' or any other author you could name and the project would slowly fade away as I concentrated on 'getting on with life' or so I thought.

But something inside just wouldn't let that thing lie down and die! Something inside kept bringing me back to the idea that I do want to write books, that I want to tell stories that people will listen to or better yet to read maybe even after I've departed this earth (no I'm not planning to go anywhere, but I hope you know what I mean) something just wouldn't let it go!

I started writing a few years ago primarily to see if I could generate a little income and learn more about the craft of writing, to see if I 'had what it takes' to be a writer! but this week I read something on a blog that really struck me that said 'Some people publish stuff, either in a self-published book or on the web and it might not be that good, but they call themselves writers'

I've decided I don't want to be a 'writer' like that! I want to go so much further than that! I want to keep working at this craft until I become not just a writer but a 'Storyteller' To me that's the ultimate, and it's something we can all achieve with passion!

It was just after Christmas and I had a couple of days off before going back to work and for some strange reason I was thinking about a short story that I'd written for an assignment years ago and how good it felt to do the assignment, I'd lost the piece of work, but I remembered the rough feel of what the piece was about and for some strange reason I just decided that well enough was enough and it was time that story saw the light of day, so I started writing!

That's when I began to write the novel that I've just finished and serialized on Hubpages, now for the strange part, the bit that I was trying to remember about I didn't put in the hubs at all, but a similar piece is in the book (Sorry guys) as it's where 'Chambers' (the missing MI6 agent wakes up for the first time in his cell!) and from there I just sat down and started to write!

I think that's the point when a muse came and sat on my shoulder and started saying very loudly "At B$$$$y last!" if you get my drift! (and she's been talking nonstop ever since) we've even got Book 2 started but that's not going to be serialized for a while as I want to get into it before starting the process again.

I suppose if I was to try and boil this hub down to one idea it would be this, "NEVER GIVE UP ON YOUR DREAM!" I had for a long time! I used all the reasons under the sun (Hell I'm still working a 65 hour week!) but this time I wasn't letting go of the dream, I'd done that too many times before and it was starting to eat away at my soul (Yes this hub is probably a bit of a rant, and maybe it's making some feel uncomfortable, I'm a little bemused that I'm even writing this way, but someone might need to hear this!) but once I started and realized that the same things were going to crowd in again and try to stifle that dream the fight was on!! And I mean it was a fight!

For the last five months, my day has started at 4.30am! Now I'm not saying that for any special 'pat on the back' but to bring out the point that if you really want this then you'll find a way! You'll make it happen!

And it started with something I love doing. It started with me writing five or six hundred words of the novel, I might decide to change what I'd written during the day, but that would only take a few minutes at night as I'd spent the day thinking through either what I'd written or what I was going to write!

It really is! it's like I've been bitten by a bug and I just can't get rid of whatever has been put into my system, one of the writers here described publishing the first novel as exciting, what they didn't tell us is that I'd be 'bouncing off the walls' for a week!

Sure I'm not seeing spectacular success and the booksales are rather on the small side at the moment, but the fact is they're there! and the thrill of seeing that book out on both Kindle and in print is amazing!

Truth is I probably wouldn't have written the book but for the help and encouragement that I got along the way from really gifted writers and storytellers here on Hubpages and I wanted to say a big thank you to all of you.

But another part of me wants to encourage those of us who've still got dreams that we've maybe been a bit 'scared' to really take on! Maybe 'scared' is too strong a word for it, but there are things in the way for various reasons, I want to encourage you not to give up on those dreams!

I'm not going to say "drop everything and get on with them". No, you'll know when the time is, it'll be when that voice inside you says "Come on! Get off your butt and let's make it happen!" but don't give up on those dreams! instead keep working towards them and at the right time things will either fall into place or you'll find a place to fit them in but KEEP PRESSING ON WITH THEM!

Yes, I know it is, but it's something that's been on my heart for the last couple of weeks! maybe it's because my dreams rose from the ashes and I'm working towards the next dream (cutting my work hours down so I can write more) but all I know is I really wanted to share that with you, that you not give up on your dreams because life's too short to come to the end and not have fulfilled what you were sent here for!

Hope you didn't mind me sharing from the heart

Leave a comment

Lawrence