What a thief a lie can be!
A Rose is Just a Rose ......
Tell me something Good ... like the truth !
The truth is a multi faceted mastery, I have found. What I have noticed in my 47 years of learning is that the whole truth is not easy for so many people. In fact some people will lie automatically , before even considering telling a truth. Call it human nature , however a lie is still a lie. Now to try to uncover why so many feel a need to lie in the first place. Here is my attempt.
Understanding a lie is of vital importance, at least it would seem. When a child tells a lie to keep from upsetting parents and keep from getting in trouble , this is the "do what I want and still feel good " This is one of the most selfish lies and starts an early issue of skewed reality. Because our mind is a strong element and to train it to think that as long as others do not have a clue about something, then it must not have happened.
This is the most basic of lie tactics. The youth really needs to learn from the start, that a lie is not ever needed and that the truth of ones desires in not punishable, however in life one doesn't always need and can't always have what they want.(ofcourse that leads to another blog)
As children grow up, they see that adults can not handle the truth. Which leads to another reason lies are told. Parents and grandparents often times feel what the offspring says and does is a direct reflection of themselves. That in itself has always been hard for me to wrap my 3 brain cells around. We are all given a brain and a spirit of energy to learn and to have thoughts and feelings that are different than those close to us. If parents and grand parents would spend more time teaching true values and ethics, ( Gods love, hard work, helping and giving to our community) and sharing of themselves and their hobbies, views and laughter, I feel the balance would come and the generation gap would not be as large.
The next lie that comes to mind is the "white lie'. The clean lie, the lie of the purest form. To me this is just another example of adults not feeling and acting responsible for their feelings, self esteem and self worth. I feel sure many have had a person ask " Do I look heavy in this dress?" "Do these shoes make my feet look big"? "How do you like my new TV, Boat, house, ect"? So we answer in accordance to what we think they want to hear. Many times I have wanted to say" look in the mirror and you tell me" or " Oh my yes I love your new house, home, TV, I would like it better however if it were mine. Many times to a few..... I actually have said such, but one can get away with much if they tell the truth with a smile upon the face and a small laugh that admits that you are joking. Well ... sort of :)
These are the type lies that start a brand new type lie. "The white lie" combined with the "Do what I want and still feel good" lie. It is named ( by me) "Adult Child Lie" When an adult still feels like a child ( needing most approval , hating confrontation, still going to do what they want but let others think differently). Sad but true, these individuals will be robbed of letting others know them well. They will also always have to try to cover other lies that were told , there fore never fully being able to relax and enjoy others company and time. The true deep feelings will never be exposed, so passions will be hidden, love of others as well. Someone that wants to get to know you might really prefer the real you . You now have been robbed from a new friend, one that would accept you just as you truly are.
At times ( I have seen) some people will lie about small things ( what one had for lunch or when they sent off a bill, ect.) All due to how they feel about themselves for eating an unhealthy lunch per sa or concerned someone may be upset if a bill was sent the actual time it was.
What is great about becoming an adult is the fact that we are suppose to take responsibility for all our feelings, doings and comings and goings. To rellish in this time of life. To feel free to change our mind, heart and thoughts.
After decades of subconsiously training our minds to deal with others , with lies, for whatever reason. We are completely robbed of the essence of who we are! How can a person know themselves well if they cater to what others may or may not like or tolerate? How great it feels to be able to answer ones own questions about themself. Better yet to be able to know what they can do or produce from just knowing themselves well.
What most never teach to children is that the truth is just like forgiveness... Its for ones self. Both speak much of being a bigger person. Not letting "Human Nature" have as much control of us and that we have the control .... of who were are, where we are going and knowing when all turns out great , we will be content and thank our Lord for his part. However when it isn't a great venture, we can forgive ourselves and ask for Gods guidence and our love ones too! A lesson is only a blessing when it has taught us well.
To knowing the truth when it hits us in the face :) I like to think that happens when we look in the mirror, like what we see and slumber O so well
wishing all well
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