What does it mean when intimacy goes from give & take to one never giving & alwa

1. 60

   tperkins-tylerposted 12 years ago

   What does it mean when intimacy goes from give & take to one never giving & always taking?

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2. 70

   dwarfstarposted 12 years ago

   When your intimate it means you are willing to give until you bleed and that you can't offer no more.. because intimacy comes when you love someone emotionally and physically.. Even if your the only one who always give.. this doesn't mean that you didn't take anything in return.. the feeling of happiness seeing the person you love that is happy is already a prize that you receive from doing so..  So I don't agree the question entirely..  LOL.. but anyway.. we always perceive that giving should always be compensated or be given back.. but to the eyes of someone who is inlove.. this doesn't matter..  if the person feels that he or she is the only one who is giving then this means that the feelings of this person is fading or had change..

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3. 79

   dashingscorpioposted 12 years ago

   When two people truly love one another they care about each other's happiness and satisfaction.In fact part of the fun is trying to "one-up" the other person in the pleasing department. Their mindset is "Us & We" not "You & Me".
   The natural thing to do is blame the other person when we are not getting something we want. The first and actually only step you have is, asking for what you want. If it's not worth asking for it's not worth having. If after you have point blank asked and he has said no either in words multiple times or simply does not come through then you have some serious thinking to do. There are generally two reasons why someone won't give us what we ask for. 1. They don't have it to give. 2. They don't think we are worth the effort to give it to.
   The question you have to ask yourself, "Is this a deal breaker?"  If it is, get out and if it's not learn to live without. Life is too short to be trying to change water into wine. People change if and when THEY want to. All we can do is ask for what we want.
   Keep in mind the same holds true for you as well. You don't have to say yes to being used. If you are always giving and never receiving then you are being used. It's not his fault that you are willing to allow that to happen. People who love themselves won't allow that kind of treatment to go on for long. Besides more resentment builds as you believe by always giving that one day he will "throw you a crumb" in return. You deserve equality in all aspects of the relationship!
   "When we change our circumstances change." "If you want something different then you are going to have to do something different". Best of luck!
   Awhile back I wrote a hub that ties into this topic. http://dashingscorpio.hubpages.com/hub/ … ationships

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