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The Meat Industry is Horsing Around with British Consumers! (Verse).

Updated on February 15, 2013

"Hell on Earth" The Horror of the Abbatoir

The scene in slaughter-houses recently can't be improved by the death of thousands of horses
The scene in slaughter-houses recently can't be improved by the death of thousands of horses | Source

The Scandal Grows as Hundreds of Food Items Contain Horsemeat!


Eat Your Cheval, Ros-Beefs!

“We’re sorry, we’re sorry, we’re sorry, of course,
There wasn’t much beef but plenty of horse.
It wasn’t our fault, we’re victims you see
That you thought it was lamb, but found more gee-gee.

It’s all over Europe, not just here at home
It’s getting more equine close to the bone
We asked some of our shoppers of meat bought today
“They had fish and chicken: of beef they said “Neigh!”

It’s infected our schools; our kids eating horse
And cantering home with their homework of course.
No wonder the riding schools are missing their steeds
The abattoir’s bought ‘em for Tescos vast needs.

The racehorses are traveling much faster these days
The losers are soon found on Sainsbury’s bays.
Poor old Dobbin no longer pulls ploughs
He’s competing in sauces with Hereford cows.

We’re trying to blame all the mess on the French
Before the judges in Britain have us by the bench
They’ve hated us dearly ever since the great row
When we gave a few thousand a dose of “Mad Cow.”

The shares of the ‘supers sink fast on the ‘Bourse
These bloody “ros-bifs” just won’t swallow our horse
But we’ve got a plan and are now packing boxes
Asda burgers next week will have portions of Foxes!”


Copyright R Challen





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    • WillStarr profile image

      WillStarr 4 years ago from Phoenix, Arizona

      I suspect that we are going to be saddled with all sorts of unbridled horse humor after this.

      Voted up and meaty.

    • bac2basics profile image

      Anne 4 years ago from Spain

      Bob this is outstanding, neigh classic , honestly it gave me a really good laugh, especially when I got to the tail end !! Voted up and sharing.

    • diogenes profile image
      Author

      diogenes 4 years ago from UK and Mexico

      Hi Will: it's been going on for years...of course, you old mountain men wouldn't be fazed by a nice couple of mustang chops!

      Bob

    • diogenes profile image
      Author

      diogenes 4 years ago from UK and Mexico

      Hola Anne:

      They don't eat horse in Spain, do they, but goat is often on the menu, no?

      Bob x

    • old albion profile image

      Graham Lee 4 years ago from Lancashire. England.

      Hi Bob. First class and so quick off the mark. I really enjoyed it. Well done.

      Voted up and all.

      Graham.

    • bac2basics profile image

      Anne 4 years ago from Spain

      Hola Bob.

      Yes they do, but not as much these days I don´t think. I have never seen goat on any menu´s though, but Rabbit is very popular here and I remember one morning waiting for a lorry to pass the end of my track so we could drive out onto the main road, it was filled with lovely cuddly white bunnies and I just started to say to my Hearty " oh look at the lovely bunnies " but stopped when I realised it was heading for the abattoir, shame.

    • diogenes profile image
      Author

      diogenes 4 years ago from UK and Mexico

      Hi A;;"

      Old Albion

      Anne (again)

      ubaidh86

      Thanks for visit and kind comments

      Bob

    • Jools99 profile image

      Jools99 4 years ago from North-East UK

      Bob, now it's my turn to chant! Brilliant! I canter wait to share this with my Aunty Winnie (wah,wah,wah....). Shared all over the shop etc.

    • diogenes profile image
      Author

      diogenes 4 years ago from UK and Mexico

      Hi Jools...we'll be competing for Nation's top bard soon!

      Bob

    • xstatic profile image

      Jim Higgins 4 years ago from Eugene, Oregon

      Wonderfully funny! I have followed this story wondering when it would be trotting across the Atlantic . perhaps in our imported meat products.

    • diogenes profile image
      Author

      diogenes 4 years ago from UK and Mexico

      I'll bet you it's there by now and just waiting to get discovered.

      bob

    • xstatic profile image

      Jim Higgins 4 years ago from Eugene, Oregon

      I was afraid of that!

    • rasta1 profile image

      Marvin Parke 4 years ago from Jamaica

      An interesting method of expressing a controversial topic.

    • tillsontitan profile image

      Mary Craig 4 years ago from New York

      Now when my friends say "night Mare"

      I usually return a stare

      With things progressing as they are

      I'd better run in to my car

      Lest I be taken for a horse

      And slaughtered on the spot of course.

      Loved your poem Bob, your irony is certainly not lost! The scary thing is it seems to be spreading so I would say farmers hide your horses!

      Voted up, useful, funny, awesome, and interesting.

    • elayne001 profile image

      Elayne 4 years ago from Rocky Mountains

      Our Tongan friends and family love 'em a bit of lo'i hoosi (horse mixed with taro leaves and coconut milk) - the more the merrier! Perhaps you can reroute the meat to them. My brother loves to ride his horses and told my husband to stay far away from them!!

    • justmesuzanne profile image

      justmesuzanne 4 years ago from Texas

      This is so horrible. This is what We the People of the United States paid Ken Salazar, former Secretary of the Interior to do for years and years. He stole our horses from our public lands and sold them to his cronies for pennies on the dollar so that they could be shipped off to be brutally slaughtered and eaten. Horses that are auctioned often fall prey to slaughter as well.

      http://www.alternet.org/environment/brutal-and-sec...

      Voted up and useful!

    • tonymead60 profile image

      Tony Mead 4 years ago from Yorkshire

      Well done, what a funny verse, there were some really funny jokes circulating too. They compared Tesco Burgers to others and they won by a neck, sort of thing.

      I have not since the sixties bought meat or produce from supermarkets, prefering to support local butchers, because it tastes better. I think people who buy food at Tesco just hate their families giving them such rubbish.

      cheers Tony

    • Au fait profile image

      C E Clark 4 years ago from North Texas

      Excellent verse and quite funny! Wait 'til you hear what's in store for us on this side of the pond. Yes, I plan to write about it if I just live long enough. Better even than pink slime.

      Up and funny! Will share.

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