ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Don't wink and drive

Updated on April 19, 2013
You want this, even though you don't know what it is. We agree.
You want this, even though you don't know what it is. We agree.

Keep all your eyes on the road

A wink is a facial expression made by briefly closing one eye. It could be either eye: experts are unclear on this point. Winking happens behind the wheel. In that brief span of closure, your vehicle speeds along mostly unguided. Your brain receives less than half of the information normally available. We all pretty much agree that it's a bad thing under those circumstances. Don't wink and drive.

Systane Ultra Lubricant Eye Drops

If you must blink your individual eyes, lubricate your eyes both before and after the blinking process. This handy eye lubricant fits easily in your hand as you dispense soothing liquid drops into your ocular sockets. We strongly recommend resisting any urges to deploy this product while driving. Wait until you are safely idling in the drive-through at Taco Bell before dripping drops of any type into your vision receptors.

Wink-Ease

If you've read this far, you are either preparing a lawsuit or learning English as second language. Either way we can all agree that while winking and driving really stinks, tanning and winking and driving is much worse. To avoid finding yourself in such an avoidable situation we suggest a pair of Wink-Ease devices. They also prevent tan lines.

TONYMOLY Cats Wink TokTok Stick Balm

We have no clue what this is. Amazon sells it, so it must be good. An irresistible cuteness factor makes us want several of them in the car on the passenger seat next to us as we drive down the road not winking. Perhaps Tonymoly cats represent a powerful winking lobby secretly welding power in the halls of government. Beyond that, you'll have to do your own research. Keep us posted.

Charmtastic: Wink

If Halloween could wink, it would look like this. It does the winking, so you don't have to. Any Charmtastic bracelet, necklace, or accessory will inter-operate with this bauble. It goes well with driving and not winking. Order a set for all your favorite safe drivers as a reward for staying between the white lines.

Wink Wicker Outdoor Daybed with Canopy and Sunbrella Cushion

Herein we provide motivation for arriving home safely to partake of 40 winks in your outdoor daybed. Scientists mostly agree that safety can be achieved by sleeping: we concur, as long as you do it in a Wink Wicker Outdoor Daybed. This attractive furniture will not fit behind the wheel of your personal vehicle, so you're not tempted along those lines.

E-Z-GO 5-Panel Wink Mirror

Install this wide-angle mirror strategically in your RV or Prius to provide panoramic views of what's behind you. Don't be caught unawares by flashing red and blue lights attached to a vehicle driven by a uniformed agent of the state wearing badges and festooned with more gear than Batman. The outcome is rarely productive. This handy device will show you what you've been missing while you were winking.

Take this simple poll so you will stay on my page longer

I want all the TONYMOLY Cats products

See results

Comments

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment
    • drbj profile image

      drbj and sherry 

      6 years ago from south Florida

      I solemnly promise not to prink, ink, stink or wink while I drive, nicomp. But if offered a champagne toast, I just may clink!

    • breakfastpop profile image

      breakfastpop 

      6 years ago

      I can't wink and drive. I don't have the gene for winking! Up and funny....

    working

    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

    Show Details
    Necessary
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Features
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Marketing
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Statistics
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
    ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)