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How not to make money at Hubpages

It seems as if I've been here at HubPages for a year now. Not too shabby that I've made it this far and I can still come up with the occasional hub. As I've not earned very much over this past year I thought I'd give you a list of things that you can do to be sure you do not earn any money at HubPages. This is not a comprehensive list, however, if you do even just a few of these things, I am more than certain that you will succeed in not earning very much money at all.
- Do not create a Google Adsense account. Having one of these gives you some potential income that likely you do not want, considering you are reading this hub. I have a Google Adsense account, but fortunately for me, I don't get any revenue from it.
- Create hubs about topics that concern practically no one. I believe I have cornered this market in writing inane hubs, however, it is quite possible that you can come up with some hub ideas that have no marketing value whatsoever. Just off the top of my head I can come up with a few ideas: "How I Walk", "My Favourite Colour of Sock", "In Praise of Dandelions" and so on
- Do not tell anyone that you are hubbing. This is a sure way to generate extremely little traffic. You may occasionally get the odd hub hopper, but apart from that your traffic will be abysmal. I would especially recommend here that you do not mention your hubs on FB or twitter. If you have a blog with a constant readership of three people or less, feel free to mention one out of every thirteen hubs you post on your blog. I think that amount of traffic will be tolerable in terms of low to no income generation.
- Have an inordinate amount of spelling errors in your hub that are not spelling errors. This will be sure to turn some readers off. Four example, they're are two many mistakes too mention, and so there pet dog eight to of them.
- Post only one hub every three or five months. If you post more frequently than that, you may develop a following of people keen to read your hubs.
- Read the hubs of other people only when there is a full moon. You'll leave more succinct comments on those days and it will prohibit you from commenting on so regular an interval that people will come to expect it.
With these tips I should hope that you find success in not earning any money with Hub Pages. Please feel free to participate in the poll I've prepared below, or don't if you feel there is a risk that doing so would cause you to earn some money.
How do you feel about earning money at hubpages?
Comments
LOL! OMG I loved it!!! I was so confused because I started reading it as if it was an advice on "How to MAKE money on Hub"... I was really confused... I had to go and read the title again. Thank you very much for the "anti-advice" :)
Nice. Now I know what I have to do to not earn much ;-). Oh, BTW, I followed you.
In explicably I've made some money and not touched hub pages for two years... Any idea what ever became of Greg Sage?
I must be doing something very wrong because my earnings are next to none- I think my earnings are around $35.00 for the last two years. What is the big secret to making more money threw my hubs?
awesome, funny, helpful, interesting! Just great!!!
Hella funny. You made my day. You have some awesome ideas. I am definitely not going to implement any of these ideas. I want some horrible cash after all.
I think I have mastered the art of not earning anything, its quite a challenge but its one that is most fun to do. Money is overrated and we need to fight the power. But I ended up giving up my family and house and still seem short. lol great hub for a good laugh, thank you so much for this. Thumbs up :)
Ah --pretty funny--how succinct should I make this hub in order not to make any money???? Sharing this!
I will take your anti-advice to heart immediately! Thank you for showing me the path to financial ruin. :) Voted up and sharing. Great job!
Fun hub. Useful tips to avoid earning money. Though I think if you follow Number 1, you don't need to bother with the rest. Oh dear, I'm breaking rule number because this comment can no longer count as succinct. Oh no, oh no, does that mean I might earn some horrible cash?
Funny stuff you have here. Such a wide variety of responses adding to the humor--a sign of a hub that will make you some money if you're not careful!
Sounds easy enough... Why not try it.
lol lol lol - this hub must be all about me and has my silly name writen all over it - lol lol - I have not made one penny here at the Hub during my time so in terms of making money I have been a complete abject miserable failure.
Good work here though Phil and in the next life I will listen to you this time around - sending you warm wishes and good energy from lake erie time ontario canada 3:22pm
You hit the funny bone here. What a talent for writing funny "dribble." This is true dribble, however. Hubbers have a choice with these options explained very clearly. They definitely should bookmark your article if they're not interested in the money even a little.
Voted funny.
Back again.
If you don't want to earn, say no to AdSense and never use your referral tracker.
Don't forget if you don't want to earn from hub pages never share your work or the work of others with your referral tracker attached.
This mistake might cost you your reputation as a non earner.
This made me smile! Reminds me, I seriously need to spread the word some more, backlinking drives me mad!
Good advice, Phil Plasma, but I must admit writing inane hubs is much more fun!
As a writer I write about what I know. If I earn from the hubs great if not I have done what I loved and had fun doing it. When I first started hub pages I had another article waiting to be published. The week was the longest wait not knowing if what was written had enough value to be published.
One of my subjects takes constant revision. This hub has been revised five times in the past six months. If you don't want to make money this type is what I recommend. The amazing thing is it sits in the number one slot in my back office sleeping. I have a link on one of my websites which is hit occasionally. If you don't want to make money don't link.
Voted up, funny and sharing in my facebook group.
LOL! I laughed out loud while reading this hub! What a way to present your ideas... I hope more people will benefit from your tips and pointers ^_^
Very funny hub. Ironically, you might make some money off of it!
Cute article. I'm new here and moving along at a snails pace in terms of earning anything. So I can't say I'm following all of the "rules" you outlined above. :)
~Becky
This is funny stuff and nothing like some reverse psychology to really get things moving. Oh man... it isn't a full moon tonight is it!
Follow these words of advice and you surely will succeed in not earning a dime! LOL
A fun hub, although I have to confess I misread the title at first. I got into hub pages more as a hobby, but now I'm starting to see earnings, the SEO side of things has become a lot more interesting. While I wouldn't stop if I didn't earn, the extra money is certainly welcome and I fully intend to continue to write about what interests me, not only what pays.
Up, funny, sharing and pinning.
As someone named Millionaire Tips, I do have to at least look like I am trying! I would add that letting all of your hubs fall asleep would be another great way to not make any money. Wait, is it a full moon?
Awesome read. Your advice has been the first that am certain to be able to follow and receive the expected results! Thanks for the laugh!
This is funny and tongue in cheek and made me smile. I did think about voting the hub down. That would be the logical thing to do so you would make less money but that would probably be mean!
I feel so successful now! Thanks for validating my world! Everybody has to be good at something, right? Great hub. I thoroughly enjoyed this!
"1.Do not create a Google Adsense account." - This has been my tactic from when I first joined this website, almost three years ago.
"Four example, they're are two many mistakes too mention, and so there pet dog eight to of them." LOL I gotta say - such writing will certainly get people running away ... might get a few stoned kids sticking around to laugh at it but that would probably be it.
"5.Post only one hub every three or five months. If you post more frequently than that, you may develop a following of people keen to read your hubs." - I see ... this is where I went wrong - I started posting more than one hub every few months ...
Fun read. Thanks for the tips. In case I ever earn a penny here on Hub-pages, I'll come back and re-read this hub.
Cheers!
Great Hub Phil! I havent been around for a while. Reading this Hub reminds me of how much fun this is! Thanks!
Hilarious read, and I may try and not follow your advice!
Phil
interesting ideas, but I'm sure when I read many hubs they have only one intention. Some write about things that have neither expereienced or know anything about other than what they have read about on wikipedia. I'm happy enough with the nice comments I get.
cheers
Tony
Hehe I will be sure NOT to follow these tips! Nice to connect with you though
I'm totaly on board with the favorite sock color hub. Count me in.
Great advice. I need to begin writing more Hubs. Voted up!
Voted up and stuff.
As with anything how not to do something is usually easier than how to do it.
ANTI ADVICE. ASTONISHING FACTORS TOO.
What a great Hub, very, very funny and quite clever. I am so tired, bored to tears really, of the constant hubs claiming they know how to increase our earnings. Enough already!
If I wanted to spend all my time and energy doing boring, mindless, repetitive, non-creative things to try and increase my income, I would just go get a desk job somewhere!
Wait, I have a desk/day job. However, HubPages is my creative outlet, what I do for me. HP is where I can read and write whatever I want and engage in great conversations and discussions with like-minded people.
Why would I want to destroy that by turning it into an obligation with the drudgery of a regular job? I don't want to. :) Absolutely great Hub. I fervently hope you make no money off of it whatsoever. :)
I am SHARING this, but not so you will make money.
This is a hilarious hub! Well written and I hope that it doesn't ruin your no money making streak! Which it might...
You hit the nail on the head with these fantastic tips for not earning money on hubpages. Voted up as funny and sharing.
Excluding my personal favorite (completely isolate yourself from HubPages by taking an axe to your router), I think you've provided a feasible game plan for fiscal failure.
Good show, Phil. Perhaps we can collaborate in the future on zany new ways to deflect those pesky pennies away.
Great hub. Fun and right on! Keep going my friend. Voted up awesome. Thank You.....
Good advice. Haha
Very funny hub - why is there so much more humour in not making money than there is in raking it in?
*sigh* As one who is guilty of following some of those "rules", I am so offended... ;). Funny and useful!
Haha nice tips! This was a good and funny read.
Add one more thing...DO NOT GROUP YOUR HUBS....by doing so it affects your income.
Im afraid I am guilty of number 2I Haha.
I agree, if we all follow this advice, we will NOT make any money. Fortunately, most of us don't do these things! A witty take on how not to make money.
Useful and funny. Nice hub!
Awesome advice! Love this hub. Many votes!
Outstanding anti advice!!!!!!!!!!! By not following the wisdom here some poor fool might net themselves some horrible cash!
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