Here we see a proud Formal Maggot, clad in his best attire, posing for international photographers in the anteroom of the recycling center of Stockholm’s primary town dump. It is just moments before he will slither onstage to be received by a waiting audience of dignitaries and other slugs, as he receives the Nouvelle Feast Prize, awarded at this time each year for Most Unique Diet. (You may recall that last year’s prize went to Dicky the Dung Beetle.)
This Dipterid has successfully cleansed and consumed the decaying flesh from the open wounds of no fewer than 17 maimed refugees of the recent Paris food riots, and is therefore being recognized for both his unique culinary inclinations and his larval largesse in service to humanity. Being quite proud of his descent from French blueblood bluebottle flies, he has asked that the Committee call him to the stage as Le Maggot (pronounced ‘Mag-goh’).
This evening’s presentation will adhere to a radically compressed program, in the hopes that Le Maggot can be given his award and certificate — and an opportunity to say a few words to those gathered in the auditorium — before transforming from a larva into a full-fledged fly. (As an added precaution for that eventuality, pest strips and swatters have been banned from the hall.)
It is expected that the Maggot’s immediate family of approximately 17,653 assorted slimeballs will be present as their celebrated relative takes the stage.