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How to Get Out of a Rut in Your Life?

Updated on October 25, 2011

How to get out of a rut? The question thundered in the quietness of the night. I felt stuck in the rut the past month! I was desperately trying to get out of the rut and yet I just couldn’t. Shame and guilt washed over me in waves. Ripplemakers know better right? I should know what to do. I did know but the feelings of gloominess and sadness hovered heavily on top of my head. I just couldn’t seem to shake it off.

But for what it’s worth, I tried.

I tried uttering positive affirmations. I am special. I am a beauty to behold. I am joy and love and compassion. I am whole and complete. I am the light of the world. I am the greatest miracle in the world. I could feel my throat tightening. I was in a state of disbelief. I almost choked on the last words. Another voice taunted me. That’s not true and you know it.

U-oh, there goes the inner battle again! I will not be ashamed to admit that in my own healing journey, I still stumble and fall. And there are moments when I just can’t find the light no matter how hard I try.

I tried Ho’oponopono. The mantra came out in a half hearted cry of a hurting soul. I’m sorry. Please forgive me. I love you. I thank you. I’m sorry. Please forgive me. I love you. I thank you. My chest tightened in pain. My ears were blurry with tears. I placed my hand gently on my chest, above my heart where I could feel the heartbeat pulsating. I continued. I’m sorry. Please forgive me. I love you. I thank you. And so I cried and said the mantra over and over again until the pain eased. Calm descended and my breathing steadied. Father God, please hug me. I fell asleep.

I share this part of me to you because I know at one point in our lives, we share a similar pain, the ache, the grief or anguish and no matter what you do, it just wouldn’t leave. Some of us just get swallowed by it all. Some of us drown the pain with drugs, alcohol, sex, food, shopping. Some of us become angry with ourselves and beat ourselves up for being in the rut. Some of us cry. Some of us just numb ourselves. Some of us try getting a new haircut, a facelift, or buy a new dress. Some of us turn to friends for comfort. Some of us reach out to God and pray.

The following day, I woke up feeling a bit better. As I looked at my face in the mirror, I smiled at myself. I declare aloud, “Every day I am getting better and better. Every day I am learning more about myself. Every day I am responding positively.” And I began to say aloud the things I am grateful for. “I thank you for going on and facing yourself with gentleness. I thank you for allowing yourself to feel and express all the hurt and confusion within.” A tear escaped my eye but I am feeling better.  The twinkle is back too.

How to get out of a rut? The question came back to me quietly. There are indeed many ways to help you get out of the rut. But today, I would just like to share with you that one way to get out of the rut is to accept yourself, your feelings and not hate yourself for feeling all these things. It’s about making a choice to go on even if it’s just moving one step ahead to feeling better.

It’s allowing yourself to be quiet so you could hear yourself think and feel so you would know what is truly bugging you. If you are able to identify what that thing is, you will be able to deal with it more.

During my meditation, I recognize that I was trying to find my path again. I had been so busy and preoccupied the past month trying to juggle my activities both online and offline that my spirit was screaming for me to halt. Stop. Breathe. Learn to enjoy and surrender to the moment. I have been straying from the path that my soul yearns to do and I have been re-awakened.

What a joyous discovery! I found my voice again. I felt like I was lost and now I am found. And for now, it’s more than enough.

By: Michelle Simtoco

Helpful Articles

Stuck in a Rut? Here's How to Get Out: Ever find yourself stuck in that terrible loop of inactivity, depression, and anger? Are you angry at the world, others or yourself because you're not getting things done - or even started because you're circling around and around, covering the same ground and never moving forward?

10 Tips to Get Out of a Rut: If you find yourself stuck in a rut, life can become monotonous, dreary and uninspiring. It is easy to feel life is going nowhere, especially if we have problems at work or with family. To bring newness into our lives we need to first realise that we are actually stuck in a rut. After that we can make a conscious decision to rejuvenate our lives.

Read More:  Ripplemaker's Hubs

Are You Feeling You are Stuck in a Rut?

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    • Terry27 profile image

      Terry Fatland 

      7 years ago from Southern California

      Michelle, it is my pleasure to read your wonderful words. Sharing the light is an honor. Thanks for sharing yours as well. Blessings, my friend. :)

    • ripplemaker profile imageAUTHOR

      Michelle Simtoco 

      7 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

      Hi Terry, thank you for sharing how you get out of the rut. Those are beautiful ideas that many can follow. I will do them if I do ever get into another one....hehehe but so far, I am enjoying life now and rarely get into the rut anymore. :) Thanks for reading and sharing your light...blessings always. :)

    • Terry27 profile image

      Terry Fatland 

      7 years ago from Southern California

      Michelle, thank you for sharing this beautiful and important article with us . This is something that we have all been through from time to time. When I'm in a rut, it is very important for me to get a fresh perspective. One time while walking up Mount Rubidoux my wife and I decided to try a different route. This beautiful detour took us to the bridge I wanted to see, but it also allowed me to see the words "World Peace" on the bridge which I had never seen before. This, along with another encounter lead to an article about world peace. I was able to see these beautiful words, due to the fact I approached the bridge from another angle.

      Another thing I like to do from time to time is listen to sad songs. They make me cry, but I feel great compassion for the songwriter. I can feel their pain. I can imagine what they are going through.

      When I feel stuck, I also like to mix things up in my life. Take a different route home from work. Go to the park and play on the swings. Spend time in nature. Try something new and different. Write a letter to yourself. Spend time with animals. Michelle, I hope these suggestions are of benefit to you. We all get stuck in a rut from time to time.

      Voted your hub up, awesome, and beautiful.

      Love and Light, Terry

    • ripplemaker profile imageAUTHOR

      Michelle Simtoco 

      7 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

      Cagsil, yes it is often us who limits ourselves. Thanks for sharing your thoughts. Blessings in your personal discovery as well. :)

    • Cagsil profile image


      7 years ago from USA or America

      Hey Ripplemaker, I stopped your hub to see what kind of wisdom you giving. It's always interesting reading, when I come to read you. How to get out of a rut? It can be a difficult thing to deal with. And, most often it is ourselves that are limiting our ability to function. I've written a couple of hubs that might be able to add to your being and your hub. One hub is "Stagnation vs Fluidity", which talks about both and how we are affected. The other is one of my most recent hubs- "How to get motivated". I think between the two, no one should ever be in a rut and if they are, all that requires is awareness to change it. Great hub! Enjoy your discovery of yourself. :)

    • ripplemaker profile imageAUTHOR

      Michelle Simtoco 

      7 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

      a_vaha, thank you for sharing your heart. I said a li'l prayer for you today as I know how challenging being in a rut can be - no matter what the reasons are, the feelings are similar. Blessings, love and light as you continue on your journey.

    • profile image


      7 years ago

      Hi Michelle thanks for sharing this. I read your work all the time. I know how painful it can be to get into that rut that you speak of. It almost feels like your life goes nowhere when you feel like that. I just recovered from some anger issues that I have had for years. Sometimes I get kind of down because the economy here in the United States is really, really bad right now. I think that qualifies as being in a rut doesn't it? But all we can do is do whatever it takes to survive. Good job!!

    • Courtney L J profile image

      Courtney L J 

      8 years ago

      I love the topics of your posts--- really hit home! :)

    • DaNoblest profile image


      8 years ago from California

      I know that feeling and sometimes it is all to easy to fall into. You seem to have a great way to help yourself recover from the rut.

      Thanks for sharing this inspirational hub. =]

    • websclubs profile image


      8 years ago

      Nice hub.Your writing is so positive & upbeat.

      Are You Feeling You are Stuck in a Rut? Yes Once-upon-a-time we were trying to get out...

    • swedal profile image


      8 years ago from Colorado

      Get out of a rut by setting a goal, making a plan and executing it. No stopping, no failure, no surrender til that goal is in the rear view mirror.

    • ripplemaker profile imageAUTHOR

      Michelle Simtoco 

      8 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

      Mike, 3 to 5 hubs a day! Go, go, go! :) Yes, driving seems to be good correlation... hehehhe

      Garlic Angel, you are a sweetie, thanks for dropping by.

      Edwin,that is a beautiful way of putting it..thanks for sharing.

      Onceuponatime, those words are really powerful. I use them a lot! Glad to meet you here on Hubpages! See you around.

    • profile image


      8 years ago

      Ok , you first make sure you are in four wheel drive, then select the appraote gear, then slowly ease on the throttle and drive right out...ok not what you were expecting but it does have a direct correilation..ok bad spelling ,but I,m the writer!!! So There !!! lol

      great hub...guess i,m back on line goal is 3 to 5 hubs a day....your one in a million and an inspirtion to us all ...

      Love Mike :0)

    • Garlic Angel profile image


      8 years ago from Dublin

      Hi Ripplemaker, Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us. Yes even the best of us have ‘bad’ days. I am so glad you found your way out so as you can continue to do the great work you do. The children you teach are very lucky to have you, you are a good soul. Keep up the good work and take care of you.....

      Garlic Angel :-)

    • Edwin Clark profile image

      Edwin Clark 

      8 years ago from Thailand by way of New York

      Ruts are just a way for your unconscious mind to tell you to do something different for a little while. When you're ready it will let you know when to get back on track :)

    • onceuponatime66 profile image

      Jackie Paulson 

      8 years ago from USA IL

      I love this getting out of a rut. Sometimes we are in a rut for a reason, to learn something, I think. I have had many tuts but I eventually got out of them. I did the whole "i am sorry, please forgive me, thanks you, I love you." I loved it! I now send love and light to mean drivers on the roads. I send love and light to all those I am around. Bottom line, I love to be home on hubpages!

    • ripplemaker profile imageAUTHOR

      Michelle Simtoco 

      8 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

      Mioluna, thanks for the bookmark! :)

      Tiffany, wow, such a wonderful story to share to the world. Thank you for sharing a piece of that here. Stories like this truly encourage us that we can get out of a rut. :) Love and light to you... :)

    • tiffany delite profile image

      Tiffany Delite 

      8 years ago from Wichita, KS

      this time two years ago...i was most definitely in a rut. and you are right, self-acceptance is a very important part of moving out of a stuck point. i had fallen of the wagon after eight years of sobriety =( i don't even want to think about a lot of the things that happened, but by the grace of God i was able to pick myself up, dust myself off, get back on the wagon and go on. i have one year of sobriety back under my belt, and i plan to get back another 7 plus some!! thanks for all of the beautiful hubs ripplemaker...fantastic!

    • profile image


      8 years ago

      Great advices! This hub is my new bookmark!

    • ripplemaker profile imageAUTHOR

      Michelle Simtoco 

      8 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

      hello,hello: thank you for caring. I am way so much better now. :)

      Cheeky Girl: It's nice to hear from you! I wrote this before the other hub. And I recognize the need to share it because a lot of us do get into a rut. And I thought maybe it would help someone else too. I love your advice to enjoy life and pay myself first. Thanks. Take care of you too :)

    • Cheeky Girl profile image

      Cassandra Mantis 

      8 years ago from UK and Nerujenia

      Hy Michell, just saw this after leaving a large comment on another of your hubs. I hope you are okay, and that you are not in the rut, as it can be an annoying nagging thing. The quiet meditation is a great method to relax and would help a lot. The two biggest things likely to cause me to have such feelings will be either career related or relationship related. I hope you feel better and please enjoy life and reward yourself for some of the good things you obviously do. Pay yourself first once in a while. No harm in it.

      Take care, Michelle. :)

    • Hello, hello, profile image

      Hello, hello, 

      8 years ago from London, UK

      I am sorry to read about you feeling down and thank you for for a wonderful hub with great tips.

    • ripplemaker profile imageAUTHOR

      Michelle Simtoco 

      8 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

      ocbill: I hope you will get out of it soon. Hugs...

      sake71: Thank you for your kind words.

      heart4theword: You are so right about friends helping us out. I had one too and it was such a big help! Thank you too. :)

      ultimatepotential: Thanks for reading this article and for the encouraging words. :)

    • ultimatepotential profile image


      8 years ago from India

      I really loved this article, it made a lot of sense to me. Thanks. Keep up with the good writing :-)

    • heart4theword profile image


      8 years ago from hub

      I can so relate, I was feeling not too long ago that my responsibilities were imploding upon me. Humbly, I asked for help from a friend...she is so awesome! Here now helping me organize my home, she helped me get out of the rut I was in. Much nicer to work together with a close friend, sent from above:) Another Great Hub! Thankyou:)

    • saket71 profile image


      8 years ago from Delhi, India

      You write really well, best part is the way your words are soaked in emotions and carry so much of feelings with them, which almost makes the reader loose balance. Beautiful words and lovely thoughts.

    • ocbill profile image


      8 years ago from hopefully somewhere peaceful and nice

      interesting. I realized I was, and still am, for two years. I am going to break it for sure before the year is up. Thanks

    • ripplemaker profile imageAUTHOR

      Michelle Simtoco 

      8 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

      soumyasrajan: It's nice to hear from you. Thanks!

      CMHypno: Thank you for sharing how you do it. :) Small things, small does get better everyday!

      Woody Marx: Taking a break and doing something without pressure like reading a good book is another wonderful idea. Thanks for sharing your thoughts. :)

      Dave: Meditation does help...and affirmations too. :)

      Sally's Trove: Sherri, your honesty gives me courage as well. Sometimes speaking of what it inside us can be frightening. But then I realized we all have similarities. We fall, cry, hurt and laugh, skip and dance too! We all do. You are not alone and neither am I. Hugs...

    • Sally's Trove profile image


      8 years ago from Southeastern Pennsylvania

      Michelle, you speak with courage and caring.

      I know there are many reading your words who have trouble putting one foot in front of the other, trouble not measuring the present by the painful past. I am one of them.

      Thank you for showing those of us who are in a rut that we have company with someone who understands and can affirm that there is a path to another direction. ~Sherri

    • Dave Mathews profile image

      Dave Mathews 

      8 years ago from NORTH YORK,ONTARIO,CANADA

      ripplemaker, Ate: Thank you for this writing. Praising ones self-worth, is how we lie to ourself, for in truth we are nothing without Almighty God and His goodness and abilities that He so graciously, freely, shares with us to permit us to enjoy life. When we correct our way of thinking, it is God's voice we hear. Meditation, is a marvellous way of permitting God to tell us and show to us all of His greatness, and how we can apply it in our lives.

      Brother Dave.

    • Woody Marx profile image

      Woody Marx 

      8 years ago from Ontario, Canada

      Ripple: I suppose everyone has their own method for getting out of ruts...and you have some good ideas here. I like to just take a day to turn off the internet and read a good book instead. It seems to work for me. :)

    • CMHypno profile image


      8 years ago from Other Side of the Sun

      Wonderful Hub, ripplemaker. It is so easy to get stuck in a rut and so many of us aren't very good with change. I think that its good to start with small things, like maybe going to the cinema on your own if you have never done that, and gradually move a bit out of your routine and comfort zone. Try everything and accept all invitations!

    • profile image


      8 years ago from Mumbai India and often in USA

      A very well written article ripplemaker. You always write with a pleasing intimacy touch.

    • ripplemaker profile imageAUTHOR

      Michelle Simtoco 

      8 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

      fucsia: You mentioned intuition and I acknowledge the beauty of following my intuition. :)

      Violetsun: Marie, I knew you would understand all of this very well :) I felt I needed to share this part because like everyone else I do have my ups and downs, my "angel" and my "monster" side which includes the skeptic. LOL I am happy to be feeling much better now. I accept the hugs with joy and gratitude. Thanks for the thumbs up. :)

    • VioletSun profile image


      8 years ago from Oregon/ Name: Marie

      Michelle: My eyes got wet, by now my friends know I am emotional. LOL. When I read about your healing journey, "I still stumble and fall," I could identify with you, and this is the part that touched me. I find I stumble too, and have felt sadness, as I like to be positive, but then, I realize that if we didn't stumble at times, how can we have compassion and understanding for others? Your sharing this part of your journey has shown me, I am not alone when I find myself struggling. It bugs me, that here I am Ms Positive saying an affirmation "I am wonderful!" and then I say, "yeah sure!". lol!

      I am happy you have found the way again, and I think I am in the right direction too.

      Hugs and rated up!

    • fucsia profile image


      8 years ago

      I really like this hub, I believe that intuition is the purest form of thought, instinctive.

    • ripplemaker profile imageAUTHOR

      Michelle Simtoco 

      8 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

      Kaltopsyd: And thank you for dropping by to read this hub. We should all remember not to hate ourselves the during times when we feel we are in a rut, that just worsens the situation.

      Tatjana: Hi dear sis, I like what you wrote "downhills help us to enjoy more the uphills." That is so true. The delight for life is back and gratitude fills my heart deeply. I will consciously preserve my precious energy lol In the process of giving and giving, it is important to refresh and rejuvenate the self as well. Love and light and hugs!

      Ambersky: Your comment reminded me how much I appreciated that my friends were there to listen during the past month. There was no pressure just understanding. Indeed that helped a lot. Thanks for this!

      DiamondRN: It's so sweet of you to ask. After a month of tyring to get out of the rut and finding why I was feeling so restless, I am finally back and with a clearer head and intention too. :) The kids in school are doing great. This week they are having their periodical tests. Thanks for asking and hope all is great with you as well?

    • ripplemaker profile imageAUTHOR

      Michelle Simtoco 

      8 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

      2patricias: We do get stuck from time to time huh? The ups and downs of life...and I remind myself, it's okay. Thanks for dropping by. Blessings!

      Mentalist acer: Okay, I'm drinking a glass of iced tea with you. Oops, I'm inviting myself lol...good company helps that's for sure.

      Fetty: Thank you for your kind words. Most of the time I am upbeat except when I am not. Hahahaha Now I can laugh at myself again..and it feels darn good!

      Jasper: Glad this would be helpful to anyone who is feeling stuck in the rut.

    • DiamondRN profile image

      Bob Diamond RPh 

      8 years ago from Charlotte, NC USA

      Haven't heard from you in a while. How are you and your school doing, RippleMaker?

    • Ambersky profile image


      8 years ago from Brisbane


      A problem shared is a problem halved.

      It is great that you are able to share your thoughts and feelings the way you have.

      Thank You.

    • Tatjana-Mihaela profile image


      8 years ago from Zadar, CROATIA

      Dear Michelle, many thanks for sharing.

      These things happen to everyone and this is very normal. Ups and downs are normal part of life as well as positivity and negativity. Nobody can be happy and positive all the time in world where we live. Neither is that needed. Downhills help us to enjoy more the uphills.

      Happy that you are happy again.

      Preserve your precious energy...and everything will be much easier.

      Love and hugs.

    • kaltopsyd profile image


      8 years ago from Trinidad originally, but now in the USA

      Very good advice and thank you for sharing your experience as well. We all go through it but its how we GET through it. Thanks for sharing!

    • profile image


      8 years ago

      good advice well writtin and very imformative

    • fetty profile image


      8 years ago from South Jersey

      I was amazed to connect you to this hub. Your writing is always so positive and upbeat. You truly look on the bright side of life and this glows thru your hubs. Great comforting hub. Stay positive!

    • Mentalist acer profile image

      Mentalist acer 

      8 years ago from A Voice in your Mind!

      Unusualy I find drinking a big glass of iced water and some spicy cajun cooking and I'm pretty well to go,Lol...I quiet things down in the evening and read,write and listen to music...;)

    • 2patricias profile image


      8 years ago from Sussex by the Sea

      Good advice! All of us get 'stuck' from time to time, and it is a good to try to break free.


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