War and strength. Throughout history the bigger army, the most warriors and the strongest leader took control either fighting for some megalomaniac or whomever that wanted to be king and made themselves so.
At first tribes related by blood or oaths of loyalty gathered at a central meeting place - in Saxon times above Hastings there was the 'Hoar Apple Tree'. This was a wizened old tree from which shoots still sprouted, and where Harold II met the different elements of his army before passing on downhill to the battle site - where decisions were made that affected all were passed by the elders and senior members of the tribe. Local tribal chieftains agreed on the most able leader being fit to lead the whole tribe. At this time the title 'queen' had not been thought of. Sometimes later the man whose support was strongest was made 'high chieftain' or paramount chieftain. This applied to all early societies, not just European. Later, in the middle ages the king's wife was accorded honours and property by her father before she married and then by her husband. Our word 'queen' comes from the Danish 'kvinde' (pronounced quen'e), or woman, and the earliest occasions were when Aethelred married Emma, daughter of Duke Richard 'the Fearless' of Normandy. Emma was what we call 'feisty', she grabbed power wiith both fists. When she married Knut (Canute) of Denmark she was accorded a greater power. Her most famous son by Aethelred was Eadward, 'the Confessor', and by Knut she had Harthaknut. Emma's sails were trimmed by her son Eadward who suspected her of favouring Harthaknut, but she had already laid the foundation stone, so to speak, for the 'queen' role. Later queens in their own right were Elizabeth I and Anne. Between them was Mary, daughter of James II, married to William III and politically as strong as her husband. Now we have Elizabeth II with a male consort.
Women's lib, do they need it?
Forgot to mention 'Bloody' Mary Tudor, daughter of Henry VIII by Catherine of Aragon (widow of Henry's older brother Arthur), who began a reign of terror executing Anglican bishops and marrying Philip of Spain Suitable case for treatment, you'd say.
by slaughtering all of the other families vying for the position of king and queen of course.
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