What measures would you take if your child, a 28 year old college graduate, refuses to work
unless the job was in his/her area of study and pays at least $60,000 a year?
Try to help them secure such a job and pay their way if you can. They weren't born in the 1960's, so there is no reason for them to compromise on their values. Nobody has to accept garbage even if that's all the system can produce right now.
I would remind the child that each day goes by that he/she is not working adds up to weeks, months, years of no experience and no current references. None of us can live on air to pay bills and put food on the table. That does not mean compromising values but what it does mean is finding ways to prove that they are worth the salary they are asking for, even if it means working as an intern, doing volunteer work, joining community projects. Rarely will employers pay top salary for employees right out of college unless it is a top university for their area of study and the potential employee was a top student with honors paired with high visibility as an achiever. Even in those circumstances, there are no guarantees that they would be offered such a position. Opportunity doesn't coming knocking. You have to go out and find it and be ready for when it comes along.
If a 28-year-old "child" still lives at his or her parents' home, it would not be out of line to ask for a monthly rent to compensate for use of the premises and food. Meaningful help with domestic chores also should be part of the deal. The "child" needs to know the importance of paying one's way through life and earning enough money to do so regardless of the kind of job.
Why would they be refusing to work? Do they not have bills, responsibilities? Are they lazy out of their minds? How can they not be bored? If you are still paying their bills, you need to cut the cord. They are way past the age of being an adult, which is actually 23 because that's when they graduate and can pay all of their bills through working. Though the market isn't a great, there are still jobs out there even if they have to settle. If they are married and their spouse works, that is their problem that they need to sort out.
I would say if your child has an attitude like that then you have failed miserably in their childhood training. This kind of attitude reeks of "entitlement." No one has a "right" to get exactly the job they want with the perfect amount of income. It's great to have a desire to excel and reach those goals, but to refuse to work if the criteria is not ideal is just lazy and disgusting.
What measures would I take? I would probably inform him that we will no longer be paying for his needs and strongly urge him to get some kind of job if he finds starving a displeasing alternative...
Kick them out of the house, or start charging them rent to stay. They probably need to start being more realistic about the type of job that they can get right now. They will probably have to aim lower and then work their way up from there.
I suggest you first have to understand why they don't want to work.
Ask them nicely, sit down and have a talk, don't get mad at their stupid excuses and use your experience to talk them into thinking.
Cutting the cord all of a sudden may lead them into committing crimes.
You have to know the root cause for their unwillingness to work, to solve this problem.
Good Luck!
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