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Run Butt Naked, Five Things I Wish To Do Before I Leave This Earth

Updated on February 13, 2012

Places To Go And Things To See

Places to go and things to see, that should be my motto as we all have many things we wish to accomplish before leaving this Earth. I started with a hundred things I wish to do before I leave this earth and decided after the request was only asking for five in which paradigmshift so graciously bestowed, I figured I could share the top five things I wish to do before I leave this earth and leave the other ninety-five for later as this hub would end up being quite lengthy. People would get bored and run for the hills if I listed them all. Beginning with number 5.

5. Run Butt naked in the woods , you know like Tarzan and Jane only I don't want to swing on a vine as I certainly do not want a vine burn, ouch!!!

4. Get Breast Implants like the ones on mdvaldosta hub page, they always say bigger is better!!

3. Recieve a signed autograph by Pest and Goldentoad before they become famous as once that happens they will forget all about us! They will go off with the petroleum jelly, margaritas and beer, but I do hope that Toad remembers his credit card!

2. Get a score of 100 on HubPages at least 2 times and have it last for at least

3 seconds, just enough to click it on my digital camera!

1. Now if I named my number one then you would not be curious about the other ninety-five so I will leave it for another time.

So here ends my list of places to go and things to see , as I want to go to the woods and I want 2 autographs, signed, sealed , delivered and a score of a 100 that I can click and see on my digital camera, is that much to ask for?

copyright 2009

Pest

GoldenToad

mdvaldosta

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    • AEvans profile imageAUTHOR

      Julianna 

      9 years ago from SomeWhere Out There

      Aragon: You have just ressurected this one , there is also a part II. You would like to be Tarzan and I hope you fine your Jane..:)

    • Aragon5000 profile image

      Aragon5000 

      9 years ago

      lol @ run butt naked in the woods like Tarzan , would definitely be cool to have Jane with me when I do this

    • AEvans profile imageAUTHOR

      Julianna 

      9 years ago from SomeWhere Out There

      rmr: Let me see what I can dig up for bail money, just in case...:) lolololol

      linjin: I am glad you enjoyed it.

      Dana: With sharks, well that is a must see let me know when you go , I will cheer you on from the crowd.:)

    • dana825 profile image

      dana825 

      9 years ago from Chicago

      Honestly, who doesn't want to run butt naked through the woods? If you put on like a loin cloth then you could swing through the trees and be like Tarzan and Jane. I think that would be freaking AWESOME! I however, prefer swimming with sharks to running butt naked through the woods. But this was funny.

    • linjingjing profile image

      linjingjing 

      9 years ago

      Five Things I Wish To Do Before I Leave This Earth

      Good article

    • rmr profile image

      rmr 

      9 years ago from Livonia, MI

      I saw the titlle and I thought: "AEvans would never steer me wrong. I'll give it a try." I guess I should have read the part about being in the woods! By the way, I don't suppose you could lend me a little bail money?

    • AEvans profile imageAUTHOR

      Julianna 

      9 years ago from SomeWhere Out There

      Mr. Nice: I am working on the other 96 things on my wish list and I will definitely share them with everyone when I have them complete.:) I enjoyed your response and I hope that we get to 100 together. :) I also think, I am thinking what you are thinking..:)

    • Mr Nice profile image

      Mr Nice 

      9 years ago from North America

      Hi AEvans!

      On #5 I don't agree with you running butt naked in the woods...Why not in the crowded city streets? You will get lots of attention.

      #4 They always say bigger is better!! It's not about what you are thinking. Are you thinking what I am thinking?

      #3 If you think they have even 1% chance the get the get the signed autograph now, you never know people change......hahaha.

      #2 Score of 100 me first......just kidding but looks like it will happen soon.

      Please fill in the blanks for 96 more things on your wish list ----------------------

      Enjoy rest of your weekend.

    • AEvans profile imageAUTHOR

      Julianna 

      9 years ago from SomeWhere Out There

      I won't kiss and tell.. purrrrrrrrr.... :)

    • Pest profile image

      Pest 

      9 years ago from A Couch, Lake Odessa, MI

      Okay. If you promise to be a good girl...shhhhh people are watching. They musn't know our kinky ways! ;)

    • AEvans profile imageAUTHOR

      Julianna 

      9 years ago from SomeWhere Out There

      pleasssssseeeeee and how could you wear those things, your big toe wouldn't fit in there!!!!! I will give you your J-Lube back, if you give me my heels..Pleassssseeeee

    • Pest profile image

      Pest 

      9 years ago from A Couch, Lake Odessa, MI

      Who says I was going to where those FIVE INCH heels??? I will give them back...say please!

    • AEvans profile imageAUTHOR

      Julianna 

      9 years ago from SomeWhere Out There

      Pest, I knew you stole my stilettos give those back!!! Shame on you , my feet are far smaller then yours , what would make you think that your big foot could fit in those???? grrrrrrrrrrr.....give themmmmmmm.........back!!!

    • Pest profile image

      Pest 

      9 years ago from A Couch, Lake Odessa, MI

      that secret is hidden deep inside of my closet, along with my high heels.

    • AEvans profile imageAUTHOR

      Julianna 

      9 years ago from SomeWhere Out There

      I seeeee your friennnnnddddd told you huh??? Uh huh sure your friend did!!! You know I know about how you know J-Lube, I won't let the secret out. :)

    • Pest profile image

      Pest 

      9 years ago from A Couch, Lake Odessa, MI

      My f f f f friend told me about the stuff. Really...J-Lube is the bees knees of lubes!

    • AEvans profile imageAUTHOR

      Julianna 

      9 years ago from SomeWhere Out There

      J lube??? Already have some...Lol:) What would you know about J lube??mmm??

    • AEvans profile imageAUTHOR

      Julianna 

      9 years ago from SomeWhere Out There

      mmmm.. I like the margaritas but I am not a real beer kind of woman, honestly I prefer wine. Wouldn't the petroluem jelly be a little sticky on the vine???:)It could be interesting. :)

    • Pest profile image

      Pest 

      9 years ago from A Couch, Lake Odessa, MI

      Really??? J lube is the best! For the serious swinger that is.

    • mdvaldosta profile image

      Joe 

      9 years ago from Valdosta, GA

      How about getting drunk on margaritas and beer, and swinging on a vine naked lubed with petroleum jelly? That's be the ultimate.

    • AEvans profile imageAUTHOR

      Julianna 

      9 years ago from SomeWhere Out There

      NewLife: I certainly can , can't I? You know me well!!

      Sixtyorso: I will definitely be careful and especially on March 17th Lol..:)

      Anna Marie: I have been working on the other 95 and I am hoping to have it up on HP in the next couple of days. Write your own list and have fun with it, as I am looking forward to it...:)

    • Anna Marie Bowman profile image

      Anna Marie Bowman 

      9 years ago from Florida

      Great list!!! I have to agree on the breast implants! I am saving up for them already!! I have wanted them ever since I had my daughter, and decided I am done having kids! I am inspired to write my own list!! I don't know how I will be able to stick to just 5, though. I look forward to your other 95!!!!

    • sixtyorso profile image

      Clive Fagan 

      9 years ago from South Africa

      Great fun hub. Oops we are having fun. Maybe this can lead to this hub being flagged I mean B**bs and Bu** have been used extensively. Beware the ides of March, Caesar was assignated on March 17! LOL and he comments are great too!

    • New Life profile image

      New Life 

      9 years ago from Chandler, Arizona

      Nice - only you can think of stuff like this

    • AEvans profile imageAUTHOR

      Julianna 

      9 years ago from SomeWhere Out There

      I think you could too!!!:) I am soooooo excited I get an autograph!! Yippeee!!!!:)

    • Pest profile image

      Pest 

      9 years ago from A Couch, Lake Odessa, MI

      Ahhhh a vacation then! I need to get out of this snow anyway. i think i could just pay my way with autographs now.

    • AEvans profile imageAUTHOR

      Julianna 

      9 years ago from SomeWhere Out There

      You are going to have to drive a long way, I am on the west coast!!! :) Be prepared to travel. :)

    • Pest profile image

      Pest 

      9 years ago from A Couch, Lake Odessa, MI

      Ae, i am flattered and will never forget my friends here. Of course you can have that autograph! In fact I will hand deliver it! I just need your home address! :D

    • AEvans profile imageAUTHOR

      Julianna 

      9 years ago from SomeWhere Out There

      BeatsMe: Nice to see you and thank you for the compliment.:)

    • BeatsMe profile image

      BeatsMe 

      9 years ago

      Hi AEvans, good list. :)

    • AEvans profile imageAUTHOR

      Julianna 

      9 years ago from SomeWhere Out There

      Toad: aahhhh that is sweet , when I do it I will see if I can get a witness in exchange for the autograph.:)

    • goldentoad profile image

      goldentoad 

      9 years ago from Free and running....

      I can't believe I skipped this one and I will never forget my friends! I'll trade autograph for the right to witness your naked butt running! However, I think I am getting the better part of the deal.

    • AEvans profile imageAUTHOR

      Julianna 

      9 years ago from SomeWhere Out There

      diggerstory: Thank you for stopping by and saying hello, it is good to see.:)

    • diggersstory profile image

      diggersstory 

      9 years ago from #1 Tourist Trap O Town USA

      hehehe monkey boy loves running free and neked in the woods/jungle... best times. Thanks for your kind comments and taking the time to stop by. YOU rAWk our world!

    • AEvans profile imageAUTHOR

      Julianna 

      9 years ago from SomeWhere Out There

      Pam: You have that right "butt" has became a naughty word and to think we all have one. Lol:) I am looking forward to going through the woods with my luck I would get poison ivy and that would end that free moment. Lol:)

    • Pam Roberson profile image

      Pam Roberson 

      9 years ago from Virginia

      Careful now! In light of recent events, saying BUTT might be trouble along with those cartoon people pole dancing on a vine. lol! ;) Just kidding. ;)

      Fun and funny hub AEvans. Hope you get all those things and more...especially running butt naked through the woods. :D

    • AEvans profile imageAUTHOR

      Julianna 

      9 years ago from SomeWhere Out There

      countrywomen: You are so funny!!! I am working on part II, thank you for the wonderful comment.

      Paradigm: Thank you for making this request as it was a joy to write and you know I am going to aski Toad and Pest about that as that may be a grand idea!!!Lol

    • ParadigmShift... profile image

      ParadigmShift... 

      9 years ago from San Jose, CA

      I think I know how you can get all four at once.

      Tell Pest and Toad they can trade pics of you running in the woods with your new implants for their autographs and partial funding. Then also use the pics to write a hub about your adventures, including a pic of the autographs used to trade!! Guaranteed 100!!

    • countrywomen profile image

      countrywomen 

      9 years ago from Washington, USA

      AEvans- For 5 make sure you go with your "Tarzan" as you may attract some "unwanted" attention. For 4 sometimes "Good things come in small packages". For 3 I am sure they would swap autographs with you since even you may be a celebrity soon. For 2 I am sure when you keep writing such good/funny hubs then the magic number isn't far (and btw you can use software tools/tips like screenshot to capture that magical moment). For 1 I guess it is better to leave out some surprises in life and you never know whether the unexpected exceeds our wildest expectations..hehe

      Thumbs up for a entertaining hub.

    • AEvans profile imageAUTHOR

      Julianna 

      9 years ago from SomeWhere Out There

      bigdadyt819: Those could hurt and then someone would have to spend hours removing them, Lol.:)

      Elena: Could you imagine?? Those boobs I bet would clear the area...Lol:)

      blondpoet: That is hilarious!!! with my luck I would end up in the same situation!!!

      sixtyorso: I wish I could understand too, aaahh one day we will all hit 100 and it will stick!!:)

      Princessa: Thanks so much and I hope that I can get all 5 accomplished :)

      DJ: You a streaker???:)

      Cris A: I have been pestering and determined to get them..:)

      C.C. Riter: You are so welcome and and I don't understand the dam things either, let me know when you can run again..Lol:)

      Tom: That is hilarious after deliverance I guess it would be a little complicated to run the woods. You look good for your age.

      jjrubio: Honestly I couldn't do them either not that big anyway , did you check out that article? LOL:)

      The Sandman: I live in a warm climate, however it is still chilly in the woods, thank you for the compliment. :)

      Loan Consultant: I have to think about that one, but I will let you know.Lol:)

      Single Mama: Thanks I am writing a list about the other wishes as well. :)

      aka-dj: That is a great idea and I will let you know when I take them..:)

    • aka-dj profile image

      aka-dj 

      9 years ago from Australia

      Nice minie bucket list. Achievable, I think. Maybe take pictures of all 5 (LOL). :)

    • Single Mama profile image

      Single Mama 

      9 years ago

      lmbo! love ur #2 & #5..

    • TheLoanConsultant profile image

      TheLoanConsultant 

      9 years ago from Orange County

      Hahahahahhha! Which woods did you have in mind?

    • blondepoet profile image

      blondepoet 

      9 years ago from australia

      Haha jjrubio another thing we have in common.

      It is so good to be abreast of the situation.Boobs boobs boobs it seems to be a very popular topic at the moment.Dr Benson is obsessed with them in his latest hub,plus I have been reading about them somewhere else but I forget now.(Noooo it wasnt on a X rated page I mean here hahaha)

      You know you can never say too much about the boob can you?Little,big,perk,droopy,lopsided.We need to make a boob club like they have fan clubs as truly the boob is a hot item

    • profile image

      TheSandman 

      9 years ago

      I love this piece, And I hope if your going to run naked through the woods you either live in a warm climet or wait til summer :-)

    • profile image

      jjrubio 

      9 years ago

      Great hub! you are so funny! I think with all the writing you do you are bound to be in the 100 hub Score group soon....I don't think Pest or Toad could forget all of us hot girlees....( ex; you, me, blondepoet) lol.....

      I think that list is "do-able".......

      I couldn't do the breast implant thing though...Mine are big as it is. Wouldn't you worry about having to replace them 20 years down the road? There are so many complications with those things.....I am sure you are perfect just as you are! =)

    • profile image

      C. C. Riter 

      9 years ago

      Tom, you're hucking filarious! good one.

    • Tom Rubenoff profile image

      Tom Rubenoff 

      9 years ago from United States

      Forget the implants - anything more than a mouthful is wasted. I don' t think I'd run butt naked through the woods after seeing "Deliverance." Also, at my age, the whole gravity thing, you know. Thank you for the lovely pictorials!

    • profile image

      C. C. Riter 

      9 years ago

      I have done number 5, now I'd like to do it with you. I wear sandals, oh shit, I forgot, I can't run anymore. LOL the last time I tried that my eyes went crossed. I have a haf boob implant. I too want the autographs. I don't care much about hubscores as I don't understand the damn thing. Thanks for the good read

    • Cris A profile image

      Cris A 

      9 years ago from Manila, Philippines

      Nice list Julianna and thanks for reminding me of the autographs! Better start pestering the two LOL

    • DJ Funktual profile image

      DJ Funktual 

      9 years ago from One Nation Under a Groove

      I used to streak in my childhood.   Good times.

      oh and great hub!

    • Princessa profile image

      Wendy Iturrizaga 

      9 years ago from France

      Done 2 and 5 and it felt fantastic! I am sure it won't take long for you to achieve at least 3 and 2 :) Have a great week!

    • sixtyorso profile image

      Clive Fagan 

      9 years ago from South Africa

      Great five (er four wishes) but I 'll give the boob job a miss. I've had a 100 twice but when I went back to take a screen shot they had gone down again. I wish I could understand hubscores!

    • blondepoet profile image

      blondepoet 

      9 years ago from australia

      Yahooooooo this is a Purr-fect list.

      Number one I have done this.I was skinny dipping down at the river with no-one in sight.Such a beautiful day.Suddenly in the distance I saw a family of tourists heading my way.Nooooooooooooo.I had no time to grab my clothes,so I ran to the side of the bank and ran into the trees.It was quite invigorating in there as I too felt just the way I'm sure Eve felt.Yet it did strike a small hiccup,how would I ever get back to my clothes.Yes this was a very lengthy process,so I re-enacted a few movie scenes I have seen in 'George Of The Jungle" to pass a little time

      Second on the list boob implants,nooooooooooooo I don't need those yet as I struggle to manage the rather large ones bestowed upon me.But if gravity shall ever strike later in life I will be first in line lol.

      Number three alas and alack they will forget us

      Number four hub score of 100 I want in on that one

       

    • Elena. profile image

      Elena. 

      9 years ago from Madrid

      You're not asking for much, are you :-) Good luck with 3 & 2 and be careful with 5 & 4 :-) Those woods can be dangerous with boobs THAT size!! :-)

    • Abhishek87 profile image

      Abhishek87 

      9 years ago from India

      Yeah, you need to enjoy and what better way than to pan out your dreams. :)

    • bigdaddyt819 profile image

      bigdaddyt819 

      9 years ago from Texas

      Watch out for thorn bushes in the woods.

    • AEvans profile imageAUTHOR

      Julianna 

      9 years ago from SomeWhere Out There

      Abhishek87: We will get there together as that hubscore can be something. I am always so serious , so I figured I would lighten up a bit.:)

    • Abhishek87 profile image

      Abhishek87 

      9 years ago from India

      Quite a wish list there :D

      And you got a partner for the Hubscore dream :)

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