American Idol Top 7

What the crap bombs is Quentin Tarantino doing on American Idol? Not only was that disturbing, but the movie voiceover man was terrible. We miss you Don LaFontaine! Accept no substitutes for him, not Quentin Tarantino. I don't care if QT has a movie to promote; it makes no sense for him to be there. Since he's a director, he's there to direct them? Maybe they should have given him full control over the Ford video this week so it wouldn't have been so overwhelmingly cheesy for once.

As a result of their severe mistake last week (going 8 minutes over on a highly-DVR'd show is like kicking a nun in the shins just for fun), we were only given two judge's opinion per contestant. Interestingly, Paula and Simon got to critique both Danny and Adam. Paula probably would have quit if she didn't get the chance to verbally drink Adam's nectar. You know what I mean-even if I'm not quite sure what I'm getting at.

Onto someone else who bothers me, what is up with Allison's hair? It's like she has a reverse mullet. That doesn't make her a rocker chick (an expression I have always loathed with my entire soul), it makes her look like a wannabe-hip soccer mom from 1986. Someone help the girl out! As for her rendition of "I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing," I didn't like the arrangement because it seemed like her singing didn't match the accompaniment. It's the same thing every week, which if you like her, then it's great. She's consistent. But if you don't like her, as I don't, then her lack of variety is annoying and her performances are tedious. Was it a compliment that Simon thinks she's the girls' only hope? There's only one other girl left, and ol' Lil can't keep herself out of the bottom three. Allison's problem is her personality, as demonstrated by her story about the gang going to the movie premiere; I fell asleep while she was talking.

Then there's Anoop's version of "Everything I Do (I Do It for You)." This is an amazing song from a classic Christian Slater movie being sung by a fellow Tar Heel, therefore, I'm biased. (Side note: QT knows my boyfriend Christian from their work together on the only QT film I'm really into, True Romance.) I dig Anoop and he had some great notes, but part of his performance sounded like a Disney version. Not that there's anything wrong with that. Maybe I'm just quietly being brainwashed by Zac Ephron's appearance on every single show on television... scary thought.

Quentin Tarantino has obviously confused "rockstar" with "theatrical hot-mess" when referring to our good friend, Adam. I get why people like him and are entertained by him, but would you listen to 10-track CD of him screaming? I also don't listen to soundtracks from musicals, so I'm coming from a different place than most of his fans. Anyway, his jamming out with the backup singers and the band was not as cool as he thought it was. While he may be original, I could have predicted exactly the way he would perform "Born to be Wild," especially the way he ended it. At least he has a good time-and as Simon would say good for him. During his performance, Paula was making her O-face, while I sat annoyed. Simon was right--I'm with the people who despised it! Vocally, people can't talk smack about him, but the theatrics are slowly eating away at my soul.

Lucky-man Matt...what was that pocket-watch chain on his vest Tuesday night? The harder they try to make him look cool, the worse off he is! I didn't hate his version of "Have You Ever Really Loved a Woman." However, there were some crazy notes in the middle that were borderline painful, and he definitely tried to do way too much. I really liked the beginning though. I agree with Randy, the beauty of the song is the simplicity and Matt lost that. I'm not sure he deserved the save, even though I really like him. It makes me very nervous for next week when two people have to go home. What if it's Danny and Adam-what would the judges think of their decision then? I severely doubt it will be, but it's fun to daydream about Armageddon.

Wasn't it adorable when Ryan called Danny "baby"? Man-love always warms the heart. I wonder if Danny secretly dedicated "Endless Love" to cute little Seacrest. I wasn't sure about this choice because it's kinda a boring-ish song, but I once he got going, I dug it. The end was way better than the beginning, as he seemed restrained for the first half. Danny is in the same consistency boat with Allison, but I'm on his side. I'm buying what he's selling!

Speaking of Hottie-McHottersons, I kind of like that Kris chose the lesser-known (as labeled by the judges) song, "Falling Slowly." It started out a little meh, but the second half was bombtastic. That's one of the few times he has remained true to the actual song and didn't redo it, Kris Allen-style. Obviously, I don't know anything about pitch because I didn't agree with Randy at all, and neither did Kara.

I wish Lil would have done something fun this week. It makes me sad to say, but she has begun to overstay her welcome. The critique is the same every week, as is her response. I understand her frustration, but she just needs to do what she feels and if it gets her kicked off, at least she was true to herself. I agree with Simon. There were some nice moments, but it could have been better.

My personal order based on this week's performances:

Danny Gokey

Anoop Desai

Kris Allen

Matt Giraud

Allison Iraheta

Adam Lambert

Lil Rounds