Mudsock Theater Of The Mind, Pt. 5
The Helpers, Ep. 5
(NOTE: This is the fifth episode of the Omar and Butch series, not entitled The Helpers. I'm still working with that. It looks different because this is the first script I wrote where I tried to format the script the way radio scripts are supposed to be for professional production. The odd numbers that appear for no apparent reason are actually page numbers, and the cues start from 1 at the top of each new page. Also, I've added two new characters: Daruska (who first appeared in Episode 4) and Logan. In this episode, The Helpers travel to Village de Fleuves, where they meet a man named Monsieur Chien. Hope you enjoy it.)
Episode 5: River of Death
An Original Audio Drama by
Mudsock Theater of the Mind
“Episode 5: River of Death”
Omar: Man of action, speaks with British accent.
Butch: Thinker, tinkerer. Somber.
Daruska: Young woman, early 20’s. Excitable. Czech accent.
Monsier Chien: Villain, werewolf (loup garou). Speaks with French accent.
Logan: Server-woman at castle, likes Butch. Speaks with slight Scottish accent.
Scene 1 – Forest outside Village de Fleuves-Day
1. MUSIC: THEME SONG FOR THE TRAVELLERS
2. OMAR: Hello, everybody. My name is Omar. My
friends Butch and Daruska and myself are
travellers. Adventurers, if you will. We
travel from place to place, searching for
people to help and adventures to join in.
Sometimes we have to look. Sometimes
adventure finds us.
3. SOUND: LEAVES CRUNCHING.
4. OMAR: Barker’s last note had been more cryptic
than usual. All it had really said was
that we needed to go to Village de
Fleuves, a bustling port town that sat at
the conjunction of three rivers.
5. BUTCH: Full moon out tonight.
1. OMAR: Oh come on, mate! You of all people can’t
believe that sort of thing!
2. DARUSKA: Ty vol, he’s right! I wouldn’t have
thought that you would believe in such
3. BUTCH: On the contrary, I’ve seen men turned into
rocks, fish, vegetables and a lot of other
things. I’m not taking any chances.
4. OMAR: Is that why you have the Examiner out?
5. BUTCH: No. The pH readings for the river we’re
walking next to has a higher acidity
level than it should. I don’t understand
6. DARUSKA: Is it all right to drink the water?
7.BUTCH: Yes, but not too much. Also, there’s
something moving toward us at high speed.
1. OMAR: What? And how fast?
2. BUTCH: I don’t know, but we’re about to find
3. OMAR: (BEAT) Where is it?
4. BUTCH: Just over the hill, there!
5. DARUSKA: (CHALLENGING) Who are you? Show yourself!
6. M. CHIEN: (HOWLS LIKE WOLF)
7. DARUSKA: (HOT ON MIKE WHISPER) What was that!
8. OMAR: What does the Examiner say, mate?
9. BUTCH: That whatever it is, that thing’s moving
away from us. Very quickly.
10. DARUSKA: Ty vol!
11. OMAR: How far to Village de Fleuves?
1. BUTCH: About three clicks. We should be there
within the hour.
Scene 2 – Inn in Village de Fleuves-Night
2. OMAR: And we were, within less than an hour the
three of us were in Village de Fleuves, and
found an inn to spend the night at. We
also found a tavern to grab a bit of nosh.
Before we could even ask the server what
food was available, she set a plate in
front of Butch. (PAUSE) Get off, mate! Is
that what it looks like?
3. BUTCH: Yes, it is.
4. DARUSKA: Ty vol! Is that spaghetti? Nemám pochopit,
I don’t understand. Why?
5. OMAR: Lot of questions.
6. BUTCH: As usual.
1. DARUSKA: Don’t talk about me like I’m not here!
2. OMAR: There she is! When’s the last time you saw
a plate of that, eh?
3. BUTCH: Twelve years. And it’s a little in-joke
between Omar and myself.
4. DARUSKA: (SLIGHTLY DISAPPOINTED) Oh.
5. BUTCH: Miss! Miss!
6. LOGAN: (OFF MIKE) Just a moment!
7. OMAR: What is your problem, Butch? Are you going
to mess this one up?
8. DARUSKA: What do you mean, mess this up? What’s
9. LOGAN: Yes sir? Is anything wrong?
10: BUTCH: I didn’t order anything yet.
1. LOGAN: Yes sir, is there anything wrong with your
meal? Have you tried it yet?
2. BUTCH: (PAUSE, MOUTH SLIGHTLY FULL) Mmm! No, this
is really very good spaghetti! (PAUSE) Um…
3. LOGAN: Aye, sir?
4. BUTCH: You prepared this yourself, didn’t you?
5. LOGAN: Aye, sir! And sure none of the boggin
toerags here would hae figured that out!
6. BUTCH: Um, do you always give such, personal,
7. LOGAN: (LAUGHS) I’ll be back for your friend’s
8. DARUSKA: What just happened? Ty vol, why does he get
food and we don’t?
1. OMAR: A better inquiry might be whether we should
find Butchie a preacher or not.
2. LOGAN: Now then, laddie and lassie, what will ye
Scene 3 – Inn in Village de Fleuves-Night
3. OMAR: So we finished our meals and went to our
separate rooms. As always, Daruska got her
own room while Butch and I shared a room
with separate beds.
4. SOUND: CLOCK TICKING
5. BUTCH: What’s going on with Daruska?
6. OMAR: Are you really that thick?
7. BUTCH: I know you said she took a shine to me, but
come on! It’s been four years!
1. OMAR: Almost five, and yeah, I think she got the
point a long time ago. But some things die
harder than others. A better question might
be what’s going on with you and…
2. BUTCH: Logan. Her name’s Logan.
3. OMAR: Yeah, right. You two spent a good stretch
chatting. Didn’t she have a house to get
4. BUTCH: Ah, no. She’s a widow.
5. OMAR: I’m guessing she already knew you’re a
6. BUTCH: Yeah, somehow she did.
7. OMAR: Yeah, mate. Well, anyway while you and um,
Logan, were chatting, Daruska and I poked
around a bit.
8. BUTCH: And what did you find?
1. OMAR: That strangely enough, we have an invitation
to see the head man of this village tomorrow
morning, around eight o’clock.
2. BUTCH: You’re kidding!
3. OMAR: No, I’m not. So let’s get some sleep, ‘cause
tomorrow it’s chocks off!
4. BUTCH: Just one thing, though…
5. OMAR: Yes, Mr. Elliptical Ending?
6. BUTCH: How did you receive this invitation?
7. OMAR: From a hunchbacked dwarf in a wheelchair.
8. BUTCH: Now you’re joshing!
9. OMAR: Yeah, mate, I am. Now get some sleep!
Scene 4 – Chateau du Chien - Day
1. SOUND: WIND AND FOOTSTEPS
2. OMAR: The next morning Butch had a heaping plate
of eggs and Daruska had a seething bowl of
teenaged jealousy. After that, we asked
Logan how to get to the head man’s house.
Even I had to admit to being surprised at
3. LOGAN: Ya dinna hae to worry. I’ll be walking you
4. OMAR: Poor Butchie nearly spit out his eggs, and
Daruska got the oddest look of
satisfaction and anger on her face.
5. DARUSKA: Ty vol! I should have known you were
involved in this somehow!
6. LOGAN: Settle down lassie! Everyone in Village de
Fleuves works for him.
7. BUTCH: Him who?
1. LOGAN: Don’t worry your pretty head, Butch.
You’ll know as soon as you need to. Now
finish up your food, there’s a bit of a
slog to get there.
2. OMAR: Of course, neither Daruska nor I got any
food, but Butch gave us the rest of his
eggs. Then we started out.
3. SOUND: FOOTSTEPS
4. DARUSKA: Ty vol!
5. BUTCH: (CALMLY) I gotta say, it’s well hidden.
6. LOGAN: Aye. You’re so much like him.
7. BUTCH: Yeah, well, you’re a lot like her.
8. OMAR: Save it for the wedding night, you two.
9. DARUSKA: I’m going to be sick.
1. OMAR: Certainly posh, though.
2. LOGAN: Aye, it is that. You know, the three of
you are famous.
3. BUTCH: What do you mean?
4. LOGAN: Aye, we’ve heard tell of stories about
two or three people who travel round from
place to place, helping out people who
need it. One of the most famous is the
5. DARUSKA: Metal men? Muži z kovu? Co to znamená?
6. BUTCH: It was from before we met you.
7. OMAR: How do you two understand each other?
8. LOGAN: Aye, so much like him.
9. BUTCH: But some things still confuse me.
1. LOGAN: Ah, the joy of the question.
2. DARUSKA: I’m a little tired of this.
3. OMAR: I’m with you.
4. BUTCH: Have people been dying here? Or
5. LOGAN: Aye, there’s many have gone missin’.
6. BUTCH: And what about the wolf?
7. LOGAN: Ah, Butchie! You do get to the quick of
it, don’t ye? Hauld yer wheesht and
listen. About five year ago, as most here
reckon, the head man arrived and took
over the chateau. It was already built,
but the previous owner met a violent end.
The why is still a mystery, but the new
man came in and wheesht! The auld man was
nae skint but the new man is minted!
1. LOGAN: (CONT FROM PREVIOUS) Well, about four
years gone, people began disappearing.
Not many at first, mind ye, about one
every five months. And we heard the most
unearthly howling in the forest. Lately,
it’s been getting worse, and there’s
nothing to be done aboot it. But now
you’re here, which is pure brilliant
2. BUTCH: I don’t know that I would call it luck,
Logan. We’re here because we’re needed.
3. LOGAN: No, man, I dinnae expect you would call
it that. Well, here’s the door to his
room. I cannae come in wi’ ye. (SHORT
PAUSE) Ah Butchie, yer sleekit! He’ll be
expectin ye! I’ll see ye by and by!
4. OMAR: I wonder where she’s going?
5. DARUSKA: As long as she goes, I don’t care.
1. OMAR: We opened the door and walked in. It was
a large, posh room. A large desk faced
us, and a large chair was turned away
from us, toward the window on the other
side of the room. We walked in and closed
the door, then stood waiting. But not for
2. MSR. CHIEN: Monsieurs et Madamoiselle, I presume?
3. BUTCH: Yes sir, it is us.
4. MSR. CHIEN: Le baisser du matin, the kiss of the
morning. I love it everytime it comes and
every time it goes away. Let me turn to
look at you! Mognsieur, your reputacion
preceeds you, you are extrêmement poli,
you have very good manners!
5. BUTCH: Merci, Monsieur, ahh….
6. MSR. CHIEN: Chien. Je m’apelle Monsieur Chien.
1. DARUSKA: Really?
2. OMAR: A great pleasure to make your
acquaintance, Msr. Chien.
3. MSR. CHIEN: And yours as well. You know, the three of
you have a certain amount of fame, but I
don’t know your names.
4. BUTCH: Actually, I think you already know our
names, though possibly not the name of
our lovely companion.
5. DARUSKA: Really? Should I introduce myself?
6. BUTCH: I wouldn’t.
7. MSR. CHIEN: You must be Butch. Your reputation has
come before you.
8. BUTCH: Merci.
1. MSR. CHIEN: Your ami, Omar, is known as quite the
clever fellow and man of action, but you
are said to be able to see around corners.
2. BUTCH: You flatter me, Msr. Chien. I have to
wonder why are you flattering me?
3. MSR. CHIEN: Tres bien, Msr. Butch! You are quite the
clever homme, n’est ce pas? And you, Msr.
Omar, would you care for a cigar?
4. OMAR: That’s quite tempting.
5. MSR. CHIEN: I hoped you would say that!
6. OMAR: Merci, Msr. Chien.
7. MSR. CHIEN: Allow me, s’il vous plais.
8. OMAR: Thank you very much. (INHALES AND
1. MSR. CHIEN: It is rare that I get to display true
hospitalité vraie, it gratifies my very
soul. And please! May I have the pleasure
of knowing the name of this belle jeune
2. DARUSKA: (FLATTERED) Ty vol, Msr. Chien! You are
quite the charming man!
3. MSR. CHIEN: Příjemný pán, n’est ce pas?
4. BUTCH: I don’t know that this is a good idea.
5. MSR. CHIEN: Dělá mu starosti o kuřata když by se mělo
týkat s vlky.
6. DARUSKA: Msr. Chien, you are so naughty! (LAUGHS)
7. OMAR: What did he say?
8. BUTCH: Basically, he called me a worry-wart.
9. DARUSKA: I am Mademoiselle Daruska.
1. BUTCH: That was really not a good idea!
2. DARUSKA: (FLIRTATIOUSLY) But tell me, Msr, about
3. MSR. CHIEN: Ah, you know what my name means, do you
not? Yes, I was born on un jour amer, a
bitter day indeed. You might think that
my parents did not love me because they
gave me un nome de ci type, a name such
as this. And under other circumstance,
you might be correct. But my parents,
they loved me with un amour qui est tres
profound! They knew what I was like, they
saw what life would be with me, so they
did the most loving thing any parents
could have done for me. They abandoned me
to a pack of wild dogs living in the
4. BUTCH: Je comprehends.
1. OMAR: What does that mean? Did you just say
that you understand? Because I don’t
2. BUTCH: I think we’d better be leaving.
3. MSR. CHIEN: Non, mes amis! My story is not finished!
4. DARUSKA: The door is locked!
5. MSR. CHIEN: You see, as I grew from le petite homme
to a man, I learned that my parents had
done me a great service!
6. BUTCH: Are there any other doors?
7. OMAR: No, I can’t find any!
8. MSR. CHIEN: I learned that in fact, the wild dogs of
the forest were my true parents, I was
their true offspring, their progéniture
1. OMAR: Try the windows!
2. MSR. CHIEN: And I believe you came here expecting
possibly a werewolf, a wolf man, n’est ce
3. DARUSKA: He’s between us and the windows!
4. MSR. CHIEN: (VOICE DEEPENING AND BECOMING ROUGHER)
But as your clever Msr. Butch has
surmised, I am no mere wolf man! I am
5. OMAR: Unable to escape, we stood and watched
Msr. Chien as he transformed from a man
into something that was half-man and half
wolf. It was horrible, he was all long
and shaggy if he didn’t stand upright and
have hands, I would have thought he was a
wolf. Leaping onto his desk, he started
toward Daruska. Butch and I both tried to
block him, but with a snort of contempt
(CONTINUED ON NEXT PAGE)
1. OMAR: (CONTINUED FROM PREVIOUS) he swatted
Butch aside. He fell on the floor and
didn’t move. He looked at Daruska closely
for a second, then swatted her too,
causing her to fall down unconscious.
Then he turned to me.
2. MSR. CHIEN: A loupe garou is not like you ordinary
3. OMAR: I’m beginning to see that, Msr. Chien.
4. MSR. CHIEN: Don’t call me that! I hate that name!
5. OMAR: But that was how you introduced yourself
6. MSR. CHIEN: It is the name my parents gave me when
they cursed me forever! They were
bitterly poor, they didn’t have enough to
(CONTINUED ON NEXT PAGE)
1. MSR. CHIEN: (CONTINUED FROM PREVIOUS) eat, and they
couldn’t feed another mouth. They
cursed me, saying that I was like the
luck of dead dogs for them!
2. OMAR: Le grand chien de la faim!
3. MSR. CHIEN: Exactly! And I will never forgive them
for it! But the worst is that I am
trapped in form, never to truly be a man
again! Never to enjoy the company of a
beautiful woman! Never to enjoy the
company of mes propres enfants aimés!
4. OMAR: I can understand that might be a
5. MSR. CHIEN: You know nothing! Zut!
6. OMAR: But what are you doing here? In Village
7. SOUND: (BIG CRASH)
1. MSR. CHIEN: C’est bon, you ask such a question? What
have I been doing in Village de Fleuves?
2. SOUND: (BIG CRASH, OMAR YELLS IN PAIN.)
3. MSR. CHIEN: Aahg! Je déteste les gens! (HOWLS,
BREATHS HEAVY) Il y a eu deux ou trois
petites anicroches, there were problems.
I came here to get away, to stay here in
my chateau and hunt at night away from
the people. But I was not left alone.
4. OMAR: She came to you?
5. MSR. CHIEN: Oui, she came one nuite brumeuse, a
night of very dense fog. She said that
she could cure me, that I could be with
a woman and have children.
6. OMAR: You know she’s lying to you?
1. MSR. CHIEN: Perhaps you are right, but that’s not
all. It’s been getting worse. I used to
only have to do this once a month. Now I
must do this every day. Soon, I will no
longer be a man at all, but only a wolf
all of the time. If she can cure me, I
need to be cured.
2. OMAR: So, what? You’re supposed to kill us,
then she’ll cure you? That’s balmy!
3. MSR. CHIEN: De combattre est fou, I know this. Yet,
as I become more wolf than man, un
bagarerr is all I crave. She did not
want me to kill you, she did not think I
could do it by myself. (CHUCKLES)
Although right now I think I don’t agree
with her. Still, she has plans for some
last great fight with you. And she said
something about a “Barker.”
4. OMAR: Yeah, I know something about that.
1. MSR. CHIEN: C’est bon. Here is the key to the door,
mon frère. Take it and unlock and leave,
because I cannot contain any longer and
if you are here I will be forced to rip
out your throat.
2. OMAR: My friends, what about my mates?
3. MSR. CHIEN: Are in no danger, they are unconscious.
I will hunt only what moves, and you
will have to move. Please, mon frère,
go. I cannot hold it back any longer and
you cannot fight me. If you are still
here I will be forced to kill you, no
matter what she might have said or might
want herself. Bon jour.
4. OMAR: With that, Msr. Chien fell on the floor
and writhed around in agony. Although he
was already pretty hairy, he started to
look even more like a wolf. As quick as
(CONTINUED ON NEXT PAGE)
1. OMAR: (CONTINUED FROM PREVIOUS PAGE) I could, I
got up and unlocked the door and started
running. I got down three different
hallways when I heard him behind me.
Finding the first door to run through, I
discovered a dining hall where a woman I
knew was setting plates of food.
2. LOGAN: What’s this? Are you all done with Msr.
3. OMAR: Woman if we don’t start running we’re all
going to be done for.
4. LOGAN: I am not “woman!”
5. SOUND: (HOWL)
6. OMAR: We’re both going to be “dead” if we don’t
7. SOUND: (RUNNING, BREATHING HEAVY)
1. LOGAN: What happened? What’s going on?
2. OMAR: Did you know your boss was a Loupe
3. LOGAN: Aye!
4. OMAR: And you still took the lot of us to see
5. LOGAN: When a man can turn into a wolf, you
tend to do what he says!
6. OMAR: Good point! Now run!
7. SOUND: (RUNNING. HOWLING IN DISTANCE. SNARLING)
8. OMAR: We ran down several more hallways, then
I asked Logan if there was any kind of
bell tower or anything we could climb
since he could track us down using his
sense of smell.
1. LOGAN: Odd you should mention that! He had one
built a few months ago!
2. OMAR: So where is it?
3. LOGAN: This way! Follow me!
4. OMAR: Like I have a choice? (HOWLING) Right
5. SOUND: (RUNNING)
5. OMAR: We ran up some stairs and got to the
bell tower. There was a ladder going up,
but nothing else. Fortunately it wasn’t
bolted in. I don’t often wish I had a
gun, but right then was one time I did.
We climbed up and I pulled the ladder up
after us, just as the great hairy wolf
got to the bottom of the tower. It was
not too high for him to jump up, but the
tower itself didn’t give his wolf form
(CONTINUED ON NEXT PAGE)
1. OMAR: (CONTINED FROM PREVIOUS) any foothold to
climb after us. For the moment, we were
safe. Unfortunately when I pulled up the
ladder it was too tall, and it fell out
the opening down to the ground. Still,
better than the alternative. The wolf
spent a bit of time pacing underneath
the opening, but every once in a while
as it looked up, I caught it’s eye and
it seemed to really be trying to look at
me. Logan noticed that.
2. LOGAN: What’s going on? Seems that beast is
trying to say something to you, almost.
3. OMAR: Yeah, remind me to tell you later.
4. SOUND: (SNARLING)
5. LOGAN: I had you pegged for trouble, Omar.
6. OMAR: Yeah, well don’t get shirty. I think
1. LOGAN: Aye, well not a moment too soon. Looks
like rain, and if we stay up here much
longer I’m sure to get dead drookit.
2. OMAR: She was right, I could hear thunder in
the distance. I didn’t know why a loupe
garou would run out in the rain, but run
he did, I watched him run off into the
woods. I could hear the howling in the
distance. Shortly, Butch and Daruska
appeared at under the bell tower.
3. BUTCH: Are you two alright?
4. OMAR: Oi! It’s good to see you two! How are
5. DARUSKA: Ty vol, we’re both dizzy. How did you
get up there?
6. LOGAN: Wheesht! We climbed a ladder that we had
to pull up after us!
1. BUTCH: Really? Where’s the ladder now?
2. OMAR: Uh, it’s out on the lawn.
3. BUTCH: Really? Should we ask?
4. OMAR: I’d rather not discuss that right now.
Right now, let’s just figure out how to
get Logan and me down before the rain
5. LOGAN: Aye, that be soundin’ like the best plan
6. OMAR: So we finally got down, though it was
hardly a doddle. Then the four of us
were standing looking at each other, and
Daruska asked the logical question:
7. DARUSKA: Now what?
8. LOGAN: Well, it’s lighty and I’ve got some food
for ye, though it’s a bit cold now.
1. OMAR: Yeah, so Butch is getting spaghetti…
2. LOGAN: Of course! Made it with me own hands!
3. OMAR: What are Daruska and I getting?
4. LOGAN: I was told you like steak.
5. DARUSKA: Ty vol!
6. OMAR: I agree with that!
7. SOUND: WALKING.
8. OMAR: Well, we had our dinner, and while
eating discussed what we needed to do
next, among other things.
9. DARUSKA: No, I don’t understand. Why are we going
up river? Can’t we just stay here and
wait for the next note from Barker?
10. LOGAN: Now, who’s Barker again?
1. BUTCH: It’s a long story.
2. LOGAN: Is that always going to be your answer?
3. BUTCH: That depends.
4. DARUSKA: Please, I’m trying to eat here!
5. BUTCH: We have to go up river.
6. DARUSKA : I still don’t understand why?
7. OMAR: The high acidity the Examiner found in
the water. We’re betting that there’s
something up there, and that Madame
Rayne is probably involved.
8. DARUSKA: That woman! Doesn’t she ever stop?
9. OMAR: If Msr. Chien was on the level, there’s
only one way to stop her.
1. BUTCH: Yeah, I have a question about your
conversation with Msr. Chien.
2. OMAR: What, you haven’t given me enough agro
3. BUTCH: Never. Why did he call you “Mon Frere?”
4. OMAR: (PAUSE) You know, this is very good
5. LOGAN: (PAUSE) Did I just miss something?
6. DARUSKA: These two have been travelling together
too long, sometimes they say things that
no one else can hear.
7. BUTCH: Like a dog.
8. OMAR: Or an old married couple.
9. BUTCH: (PAUSE) Logan?
1. LOGAN: Yes, love?
2. DARUSKA: Seriously, I’m trying to eat.
3. BUTCH: Do you think you’ll be coming with us?
4. LOGAN: (LONG PAUSE) I can’t, Butch. Not now.
5. BUTCH: I…see.
6. LOGAN: Butch…
7. BUTCH: Yes, Logan?
8. LOGAN: What was her name?
9. BUTCH: Cadha. Her name was Cadha. What was his?
10. LOGAN: His name was Bert.
11. BUTCH: Is it because…
1. LOGAN: (ON TOP) Yes, Butch. It is. I’m not ready,
2. OMAR: That pretty much ended the meal. The three
of us went back to the inn and packed our
gear. The next morning we set out to
follow the river upstream to see what was
going on. On the way out of Village de
Fleuves, something caught our eye.
3. DARUSKA: Who’s house is that?
4. OMAR: I’m guessing that’s Logan’s house.
5. BUTCH: Yes, that’s Logan’s house.
6. OMAR: The three of us fell silent and moved on
in the early morning sun. It was a cold
morning, and we all felt that what was
waiting for us might be more dangerous
than anything we’d ever done before. But
as we walked on, Butch looked back. He
(CONTINUED ON NEXT PAGE)
1. OMAR: (CONTINED FROM PREVIOUS) looked back at
the candle in Logan’s window.
2. NARRATOR: This has been The Helpers, Episode 5:
River of Death. The show was performed
by Mudsock Theater of the Mind. It was
written by Chris Neal and recorded at
Studio Cubed. Thank you, and good
copyright (C) 2013 christopher w neal all rights reserved