Virtual Gift Giving
The Great Recession
By the way, what was so great about the Great Recession? It has changed the spending habits of many Americans-permanently for some including those employed full time. The gainfully employed are scrutinizing gift lists and methodically finding ways to pare them down. Income cannot be spent the way it used to be. The unemployed with no income are virtually shut out from the holidays. We feel your pain here at Virtual Gift Giving and pledge to remove the barriers preventing your holiday cheer.
Got the Blues?
Just because you have been eliminated from the job market is no reason to despair. Is your personality giving you the blues during the holidays? No need to feel left out in the season of merriment because you have the "wrong" personality type as defined by horoscopes and Myers Briggs. Are you youthful and energetic? Your exemplary employment traits are best used to your advantage by hightailing it out of town-forever. It does not mean you have to surrender the holiday spirit of gift giving. Not by a long shot.
How, you may ask? Here at Virtual Gift Giving we have all of your answers. We have combined the finest products and merchandise available with outstanding quality and cost savings. We pass along to you-our very best unemployed customers-shopping ease. No need to worry about missed delivery dates and disappearing packages. After all, theft increases throughout entire neighborhoods experiencing high unemployment rates.
Your Reality is Our Reality
Rest assured that we completely understand your reality. To prove it, we have created a Virtual Reality Gift Selector. This new and nifty APP can be easily downloaded for FREE! Now there's a word you don't hear too often. The APP will allow you to let's say-place an order for a nice blue sweater with red and white trim. Representatives will take care of sizing and gift-wrap. On your special day, you simply present the gift to your loved one via your smartphone APP and wait in anticipation as a representative unwraps the gift in front of your very eyes. When we say easy, we mean it! All you have to do is wait in anticipation for the smiles, oohs, and ahhs! Simple. It has to be. You are unemployed. Are you feeling a bit extravagant? Virtual Gift Giving does not charge extra for the luxury of viewing pricier gifts. Your loved one will adore a glossy photo of a pair of diamond earrings or a brand new BMW.
We Are Proud-We Didn't Say Smart
As we speak, Virtual Gift Giving has global seasoned representatives available to take your special orders. As soon as you make your selection, Virtual Gift Giving staff confirm your photos, gift-wrap the photos, and send them right back to you. We proudly state with confidence that American job seekers will not replace our qualified staff. Why should they?
Millions of Photos
Virtual Gift Giving uses only uses the highest resolution photos available for our APP's. That new BMW with leather interior? We have made available millions of photos to choose from. Insolvency is king here. No cash or credit cards are accepted. Remember when we said we feel your pain? Since you don't work and have plenty of free time on your hands, take up to six leisurely months to view your gift selections. There are no additional fees on our extended plan.
Pride in Giving
At Virtual Gift Giving, we pride ourselves on thinking out-of-the box-because you can't afford to put a gift in the box. For the upcoming Easter season, we even developed an Easter APP just for you! If the cost of a baked ham dinner set with fine linens and flatware escapes your budget, simply click on Virtual Gift Giving Easter APP and order photographs of fancy dinners. New for 2018 are beautiful pictures of baked ham with mashed potatoes and veggies, turkey with trimmings, and quaint mouthwatering deserts. Thumb through your favorite magazines for delectable ideas and give us a jingle.
Share the Love
Lastly, we want to share our love for festive music with our customers. Created with you in mind, please sing along to the tune of "Let it Snow."
Sung to the tune of "Let it Snow"
Oh, the holidays make you feel sick
'Cause your bank accounts’ anemic
But we’ve got an APP that’s cool
Your Virtual Gift Giving Tool!
When the family is giving gifts, you don’t have to feel left out
With the Virtual Gift Giving App, you too can jump and shout!
To the long-term unemployed all over the place, Virtual Gift Giving wishes you and your loved ones the happiest of seasons. May prosperity be yours in 2018.