ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

House For Sale: Tales From an Innkeeper's Crypt: First in a series about Kari

Updated on March 21, 2010

I've been trying to sell my house, right? The market is bad and it's not selling, so I came up with an idea so that Kari, my house-keeper and her husband, could buy it. They decided to do it. That was six months ago, but now I'm tired of the whole dam thing. They keeping pussy-footing around...putting it off.

First they say they're putting their house up for sale, then they change their minds and decide to do a little rehab and staging...change the paint in the kitchen...put in new flooring....the old flooring was ruined when the washer over flowed...from the back of the machine. Kari took it apart while it was still full of water....what did she expect? The water ran through the whole house and ruined the kitchen floor so they had to put in a new one in.

Then they put in a new tub...took Marty three or four days...I think he miscaluculated the size of it or something. Anyhow, Kari is always taking things apart and then she can't get them back together. She did it with my electric canopener, then the microwave, and the alarm clock in one of the guest rooms. She's really good at destroying things.

I used to have numbers on the oven knob on my stove, but not anymore. She's a clean freak which is really good for someone working in a bed and breakfast. She loves to clean bathrooms and appliances. She kept scrubbing and scrubbing the oven knob on my stove til she scrubbed all the numbers off. How am I supposed to find 350 degrees without any numbers? I freaked out and laid into her about it so she drew three black circles on the knob...one for 250, one for 350 , and one for 450.

Then the next day in her continued cleaning frenzy, she scrubbed them off again, without even noticing and forgot to tell me before she left. Have you ever tried to find 350 on an oven knob that has no numbers? I was burning everything.

I put a couple of slices of pizza in for dinner and moved the knob to what I thought was 350 and set the timer. When I opened the oven door, smoke poured out and little black slices of pepperoni stared up at me. I was so mad I lost my appetite. I ran to my laptop and mailed Kari a scathing description of what had happened, beseaching her to return tomorrow and draw on some more circles.

More tales from an Innkeepers crypt

I'll never forget Robin, The naked Irish farmer, The exhuberant honeymooners

Comments

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment
    • alekhouse profile imageAUTHOR

      Nancy Hinchliff 

      9 years ago from Essex Junction, Vermont

      You know, Dolores, you're probably right But I've noticed a difference in Kari lately...some changes. I will be writing about it soon, right now we're getting ready for the Kentucky Derby so I'm really too busy to write.

      I've been training/working with her for 16 months. In the past few, I've given her more and more responsibility. Fortunately I was a teacher and know how to break down tasks into small increments and to use continual re-inforcement to aid learning. I worked with lots of students with similar cognitive problems, so I guess I'm functioning as a mentor, and I thing she's starting to "get it". She really wants to do it.

      Maybe I've been emphasizing the negative too much, because she has a lot that's positive going on too. You'll see what I mean when I publish the hub.

    • Dolores Monet profile image

      Dolores Monet 

      9 years ago from East Coast, United States

      I read another one of your hubs about Kari (obviously reading them out of order). I can't imagine how Kari and her husband will run the bed and breakfast. They just don't sound like they have the skills. I imagine you'll be glad to be far away in Austin so you don't have to see the demise of the business.

    • alekhouse profile imageAUTHOR

      Nancy Hinchliff 

      9 years ago from Essex Junction, Vermont

      Yeah, that's my house. Wanna buy it? It's a beautiful house and I'm really gonna miss it. it has fouteen foot ceilings. I'll be moving to Austin TX where all the houses are ranch and the ceilings are not high. Just hope it's not claustrophopic. :=)

    • Green Lotus profile image

      Hillary 

      9 years ago from Atlanta, GA

      What a mess alek! How frustrating and I do hope everything gets sorted out soon include the sale. If that's your house in the picture..it's gorgeous!

    • alekhouse profile imageAUTHOR

      Nancy Hinchliff 

      9 years ago from Essex Junction, Vermont

      Thanks for the comments. Didn't realize there were rednecks in Oregon. I thought they were all here in Kentucky.

    • akirchner profile image

      Audrey Kirchner 

      9 years ago from Washington

      Good lord - and here I thought being a B&B owner was all glorious fun! I would be insane if anyone messed with my oven dials but thankfully I have digital! Someone would seriously be getting a slap. I sure hope it works out for you SOON - what a terrible time to be trying to sell and I surely hear you. We think about it but we can't bring ourselves to do it right now so are just sticking tight no matter what or how much we continue to feel 'lost' here in redneckville!

    • alekhouse profile imageAUTHOR

      Nancy Hinchliff 

      9 years ago from Essex Junction, Vermont

      That's a good thing....laughing , I mean. Thanks, Rose

    • rosecobra profile image

      rosecobra 

      9 years ago

      Oh ok, I told a little white lie...I really did laugh, but still sorry for the mishaps:)

    • alekhouse profile imageAUTHOR

      Nancy Hinchliff 

      9 years ago from Essex Junction, Vermont

      Don't be sorry. This piece was meant to be funny...laugh away! Thanks for the comment.

    • rosecobra profile image

      rosecobra 

      9 years ago

      I'm sorry for all the mishaps, but I did giggle just a little, I'm sorry.

    • alekhouse profile imageAUTHOR

      Nancy Hinchliff 

      9 years ago from Essex Junction, Vermont

      Hey VS, Thanks for the thoughtful comments. Well, they have actually given me some earnest money and have put their house up for sale, finally. I think they're just a little intimidated by starting a new life, in a new house, as Innkeepers.

      I am a clean freak, so the fact that Kari does such a great job of cleaning pleases me. I just have to keep an eye on her so she doesn't go to far. Did I mention that she was OCD?

    • VioletSun profile image

      VioletSun 

      9 years ago from Oregon/ Name: Marie

      I have to admit I chuckled softly at the visuals of a super neat freak scrubbing off the stove knob numbers. LOL. I guess she doesn't realize what she is doing while cleaning, but yikes it can't be fun not being able to cook! In a way its a blessing to have a super clean housekeeper. I have been in hotels, where I paid good money, and I was not exactly impressed with the cleanness, so I usually sprayed everything with Lysol before settling down.

      Hope you find someone who will follow up on the commitment to buy your home.

      Enjoyed reading while sipping a cup of coffee!

    • alekhouse profile imageAUTHOR

      Nancy Hinchliff 

      9 years ago from Essex Junction, Vermont

      OMG...thanks for sharing. I do know these people quite well. She's been working for me for a year. Hope this doesn't happen to me.

    • flread45 profile image

      Frank 

      9 years ago from Montana

      Sounds like a couple a--holes we sold to and ended up loosing the property,because they conned others into buying part of the property when it didn't belong to them.

      So the lawyers came after us.

    • alekhouse profile imageAUTHOR

      Nancy Hinchliff 

      9 years ago from Essex Junction, Vermont

      Thanks, Tammy for taking the time to check out my place. Glad you liked it. And thanks for the comments.

    • TamCor profile image

      Tammy Cornett 

      9 years ago from Ohio

      Oh, he IS, lol...did I ever tell you about the time he fixed my dryer with a guitar part???? haha

      Anyway, what a frustrating position for you to be in, wow, I hope you get it resolved soon...

      I have to say, though, that your place is just beautiful--I googled it and spent quite awhile browsing through your website!

      Tammy

    • alekhouse profile imageAUTHOR

      Nancy Hinchliff 

      9 years ago from Essex Junction, Vermont

      I tried to get new knobs, but the stove is so ancient, no one has parts for it anymore. Went to home Depot and Lowes. They had knobs but they wouldn't fit my stove. Tom, I've tried everything, guess I'll have to stick with Kari's little black dots until I move to Austin.

      And the numbers are not etched in, thanks for all the suggestions. You sound like a real handiman.

    • Tom Cornett profile image

      Tom Cornett 

      9 years ago from Ohio

      Sounds like a living nightmare. You might be able to order a new knob from the manufacturer of the stove. Check close with a magnifying glass and see if the numbers are etched in..if they are you can get a white paint stick from a hardware store and fill them back in.

      I really hope all turns out OK for you. :)

    working

    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

    Show Details
    Necessary
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Features
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Marketing
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Statistics
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
    ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)