A Life in the day: Adulation

The moment of anticipation surrendered to the consummation of reverence. Adulation is inherent with distance; as one gets closer to the source, the intensity of the light has a tendency to blind the human element. None the less, the charge of adrenalin was overwhelming intense. Kevin came infocus holding his precious daughter Chelsea as he pointed in the direction of his grandparents while he whispered the significance of the moment to his adored daughter.

As I peered to my left I scrutinized the blissful gaze within the eyes of my bride which the tolling years had withered and weathered away all too long ago. The tilt of my head signaled the bemusement of my sorrow despite the jovial occasion. My thoughts acquiesced for a just moment to reminisce of the yesteryears. As we walked toward jubilation it occurred to me the problem with wisdom was it comes with age and ache.

“And then one day you find ten years have got behind you No one told you when to run, you missed the starting gun.”

In fact, it was the disguise of my curious acumen which noticed the absence of my son’s significant other that broke the melancholy. As if to expunge the very thought I blurted out, where’s Kiley? My wife had not seen her son or granddaughter yet, thus allowing me to point them out by placing my arm over her shoulder, as if I were taking aim... Merely the pretext to justify what I hadn’t done since I recall that look in her eyes, seemingly many lifetimes ago.

I continued my charade proclaiming to my wife, “there they are”, as I scoped Chelsea’s mom appearing as a silhouette in my sightline, well beyond in a distance. Of course my wife would know I meant her son and granddaughter even though she, like I, scouted a group of three. Although the time lapse may have only been a microsecond, it was then I heard the alarming accoutrement of the all too familiar sound of bells and whistles.

My capitulation relented to the adulation of the moment. The close proximity of the ‘objects’ of our affection became too great to emotionally contain, an overwhelming force of nature if you will. Predictably and as planned, my wife consumed our grandchild with inestimable kisses, which provided me the opportunity to peer over my son shoulder as we embraced to glimpse at his significant other. As she struggled to make progress toward the immediacy of the pack, the alarming echo reverberated between my ears.

“So you run and you run to catch up with the sun but it's sinking Racing around to come up behind you again. The sun is the same in a relative way but you're older, Shorter of breath and one day closer to death.”

As she unsettlingly sauntered toward our tight circle, she became incontrovertibly hysterical, ultimately leading to the point of dysfunction. It was then I heard the music of Elton John playing in my head, “I’ve seen that Movie too.” As we attempted to progress to the outer confines of the Greenville Spartanburg Airport in South Carolina, it became increasingly obvious the young mother had become emotionally overwhelmed by the reunion from the perception of an untailored eye…

What should have been a 2 minute walk turned into a 15 minute drama with several breaks in between. Noone could be that overjoyed. The words were not spoken, the roaring silence was deafening.And I wept inside but shed not a tear, as I sheltered her ruse. So I said, ‘you guys have a seat here while Kevin and I get the car. And she said to me, ‘we missed you guys’ as I noticed she had not shed a tear while she continually wept hysterically. As we hugged I glimpsed an image of my Drill Sergeant in my minds eye, and so then I knew.

“Every year is getting shorter never seem to find the time. Plans that either come to naught or half a page of scribbled lines Hanging on in quiet desperation”…

As was, is and always shall be the case, in my minds eye I revert to the beginnings… Adulation is inherent with distance; as one gets closer to the source, the intensity of the light has a tendency to blind the human element . The withering blissful gaze is far too great a price to pay in the name of adulation.