ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Her Name Is Heather - Losing My Sister To Alzheimer's Disease

Updated on December 27, 2020
vocalcoach profile image

Audrey's desire to help others understand human behavior led her to study psychology. Why do we fear love? Here are answers to this question

Source

Symptoms Of Mild Alzheimer's Disease

Alzheimer's disease affects people differently. This disease progresses in several stages: preclinical, mild (sometimes called early-stage), moderate, and severe (sometimes called late-stage). After extensive research, plus my sister's doctor's diagnoses, these are the most common symptoms in the early stages:

  • Problems coming up with the right word or name. Heather cannot recall most words
  • Trouble remembering names when introduced to new people
  • Having greater difficulty performing tasks in social or work settings.
  • Forgetting material that one has just read
  • Losing or misplacing a valuable object
  • Trouble handling money and bills
  • Increased anxiety

Who Will protect the innocent child?
Who Will protect the innocent child? | Source

Her Name Is Heather


Lashes laced with fringe

Feathering her beautiful face

The innocent child hides angel wings

Longing for a safer place

Her name is Heather


Afraid to eat from off her plate

Her trust is buried deep in fear

Reaching for her sisters food

Safe to swallow ghosts disappear

Her name is Heather


Rebellious spirit since her birth

Defying voices filled with rage

Unfair punishment lingers near

Beyond her years at any age

Her name is Heather


Senseless beatings fragile heart

To love or not to love

Scars wrapped in silk a tear apart

Too proud she wears them like a glove

Her name is Heather


Who will protect the innocent child?

Tornadoes whirl around her

Invisable rage a natural state

Poisons lurking to even the pure

Her name is Heather


The womans enemy now are seizures

Grand Mall is the name

Her body broken bruised and punished

The grown child there is no blame

Her name is Heather


Dementia steals her life away

Insideous thief of the mind

Grabbing chunks of memory

She cannot seem to find

Her name is Heather.


She is my sister in the dark

Trying to find her way

The time will come to claim her peace

"Take me home" is what she'll say

Her name is Heather.


God bless her for the life she lived

I'll miss her when she's gone

We'll only be a note apart

I'll find her hidden in my song.

Her name is Heather

Trying To Talk With Someone With Dementia

"So what did you do today?" (This is the third time my sister has asked me this same question.) A bit irritated I replied, "I told you...I went to the symphony." Then my sister asked again, "Who went with you?" My reply for the third time, "Randy."

Our phone conversation was getting on my nerves. My sister, Heather, had problems using the new cell phone. Every other sentence was interrupted by a dial tone. She wasn't the least bit aware of swiping the "end call" shown clearly on her cell phone.

This behavior is caused by dementia. Heather's long-term memory is amazingly clear. However her short-term memory is not. Seeing her slip in-and-out as my sister is like losing her again and again. It's tough!


Dementia Impacts Memory And Social Skills

Dementia refers not to a specific condition but a group of diseases that impact memory, thinking and social skills.
Dementia refers not to a specific condition but a group of diseases that impact memory, thinking and social skills. | Source

Feelings of Guilt

Once the conversation has ended with my sister, and my emotions have had time to cool down, I'm left with over-whelming feelings of guilt and sorrow. "Shame on me for being abrupt with her. What's wrong with me?" I tell myself, "Next time I'll be more patient and understanding." After all, it's not her fault.

Still I ask myself, "When the abusive behavior affects the quality of my own life is it okay to withdraw and stop talking to her?" I search for answers. How do I honor my own feelings and still be there for my sister?

In Conclusion

I feel that my sister is gone. I hear her voice but somehow it's changed. Even the look, the familiar eyes, the strong movements of her body, are under the spell of this devastating disease. I want to save her. I want to rescue my sister. I can do nothing.

My heart goes out to all those who suffer from Alzheimer's as well as those left trying so hard to understand what has happened to their loved one.

“I want to tell you how much I miss my mother. Bits of her are still there. I miss her most when I’m sitting across from her.”

– Candy Crowley

This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and does not substitute for diagnosis, prognosis, treatment, prescription, and/or dietary advice from a licensed health professional. Drugs, supplements, and natural remedies may have dangerous side effects. If pregnant or nursing, consult with a qualified provider on an individual basis. Seek immediate help if you are experiencing a medical emergency.

© 2015 Audrey Hunt

working

This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://corp.maven.io/privacy-policy

Show Details
Necessary
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Features
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Marketing
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Statistics
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)