Does anyone miss their family but at the same is unable to be around them?

  1. TJSMITH profile image74
    TJSMITHposted 4 years ago

    Does anyone miss their family but at the same is unable to be around them?

    First of all, I love my family but at the same time can't stand to be around them.  I feel they do not accept me and yet I feel a need to obtain justification and approval from them in which I do not get. I find it very stressful not to have an family even though all my siblings are alive and moving on with their own lives and families while I cling to the good old days not adapting.  How does someone with similar situations deal with this?

  2. wychic profile image86
    wychicposted 4 years ago

    A resounding yes. It's a long and complicated story, but suffice to say that I had to make a decision to completely cut myself off from certain family members. They were poison to me, and they made it very clear that the only way they wouldn't hurt me is if I no longer interacted with them. I made that decision five years ago, and not a single word passed since then.

    Though I know it was the right decision, it's still hard -- incredibly hard, some days. I know why the decision had to be made, but sometimes my thoughts still stray to the good times, and the positive aspects of their characters. There was a lot I loved about being around them. Unfortunately, that's also what kept me there until the day that knife got buried to the hilt in my back.

    How do I deal with it? Take it one day at a time. Some days it's really hard to not reach out and contact these family members. I feel like I'm mourning someone that's dead, and I just want to go back to pretending they are who I thought they were and stop the grief cycle. So I find something else to do, maybe take my dog for a loooooong walk where I'm away from all computers and phones. If that fails, I tell someone I trust and who knows the situation about my desire to break the silence, and they help bring me back to earth.

    On top of that, I'm constantly working on building my self-esteem and sense of self-worth, building a life where I can feel fulfilled, and most of the time that helps me think I don't care what they think. If I keep working on thinking positively and improving myself, I have hopes that I'll one day no longer feel the need for approval. I'm not going to get it, and I don't want to be the person sobbing over their headstones because they took that phantom token of approval to their graves.


This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

Show Details
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)