I'd like feedback on my Hub: An Avoidable Death

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  1. Siddharthasb profile image60
    Siddharthasbposted 8 years ago

    Hi Hubbers,

    I'd like some help with passing the Quality Assessment Process. Will you please give feedback on my Hub An Avoidable Death. What can I do to improve? Thanks!

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    1. theraggededge profile image97
      theraggededgeposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Hi there,

      Quite an interesting account. However, is the Hub about Richard Heck or about the lack of freely available medical treatment in the Philippines? Who is your audience for this article? Focus on one issue, using the other illustratively.

      Change the title to include the subject's name.

      You dive straight in without introducing the topic. You need an introduction that states what the hub is about, why you wrote it and why it is important that we read it.

      Bring his photo to the top right, next to the introduction.

      Break up the text into several capsules with sub-headings. If you always start a hub with a list of sub-headings (also known as an outline), your writing will have more focus and be less waffly.

      Expand the article a little; it's a bit short.

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      1. Siddharthasb profile image60
        Siddharthasbposted 8 years agoin reply to this

        Thanks for your feedback. The aspect of length can be incorporated in future hubs. I'm not proficient on the photo aspect though. I also wanted to include it up front but didn't manage to.

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        1. theraggededge profile image97
          theraggededgeposted 8 years agoin reply to this

          You can use the small arrows on each module to move them up and to the right.

          The Learning Center will also have a lot of information about formatting a hub. If you look around at other hubs, you'll be able to see what works and what doesn't. The way you present your work is a big part of it.

          Good luck!

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          1. Siddharthasb profile image60
            Siddharthasbposted 8 years agoin reply to this

            Thanks.

            replyreport
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