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Are We Afraid of Happiness?

Updated on June 19, 2013

A friend of mine and I were talking the other day about how, when things are going well, we get nervous. It seems that when things are humming along, there will soon be a huge bump in the road. Life is like that. You have the good, the bad and the ugly. There can come a point though where it seems the bad and the ugly outweigh the good, at least for some people.

After talking about this for awhile, it suddenly occurred to me that we were both a little afraid to be happy. We felt it would bring an onset of bad luck if we "relaxed" into our good times. We had to stay on guard for the next bad thing that happened. Pretty sad, when you think about it. Now if you're thinking we're both just a little wacky, I wouldn't blame you. However, just to stand up for my sanity a little, I have since asked everyone I know how they feel about this. When they really gave it some thought, the surprising answer was that they too were feeling much the same way.

I have some friends who have that "I don't worry about anything" attitude. To be honest, I don't believe them. I think it's a front, a defense mechanism to some point. If they truly feel that way, then I would love to know their secret! I may worry too much, but it is hard not to these days. People have so many issues to deal with that it can truly make you paranoid and jumpy.

So, back to being afraid to be happy. I am working very hard at changing my attitude. I am trying to enjoy the good and know that the bad and the ugly will pass eventually. I am also trying to realize that being afraid to be happy is not going to save me from the bad times. I have got to get over being superstitious about being happy.

My dad would always tell me, "It doesn't help to worry about things." I would roll my eyes and think he was just being a typical man! I only say this because so many men have told me basically the same thing. I don't know if women actually worry more, or if we are just more open about it. However, I am now starting to understand and appreciate my dads advice. It really doesn't help to worry about things as it won't change anything. The only exception to this is if you discover a solution to a problem while worrying about it. Then you might change the outcome.

For all of us who are nervous about happiness, we need to remind ourselves that the world will not end if we just relax and enjoy it. Just throw caution to the wind and try it. I have always believed that you influence your life with your thoughts and this is no exception. If we get nervous and expect something bad to happen, it probably will. We've "willed" it to, in a sense. So I am trying to let go and not be afraid that just because I'm happy today, I'm not going to be "punished" for it tomorrow!

Everyone have a happy day and really enjoy it!


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    • catgypsy profile image

      catgypsy 5 years ago from the South

      Guest, thanks for reading! I think you're right about not feeling like we deserve to be happy and that's sad, but it can really mess with your thinking. Balance and faith...very well put. Thanks for commenting!

    • profile image

      guest1438 5 years ago

      Great article! So relieved to know that I wasn't the only one who was feeling this way! I guess this fear comes from all of us thinking we don't deserve to be happy - but we all do. I suppose the answer to fear is balance and faith :)

    • catgypsy profile image

      catgypsy 5 years ago from the South

      Thanks Cashmere. I've also learned to not think too far ahead and it helps. Glad you have handled it well too. I think worry and anxiety are harder on you than a lot of physical diseases! Thanks for the votes!

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      Olde Cashmere 5 years ago

      You bring up a great topic catgypsy. Worrying about what is around the corner in our lives was something I was haunted with for a while. It wasn't until I started to focus more on the now of things that I was able to get past this. There's always going to be a bit of anxiety for me but I've learned to curb it a bit. Thank you for sharing, voted up, useful, awesome, and interesting :)

    • catgypsy profile image

      catgypsy 5 years ago from the South

      Thanks for reading Robert! It's hard to break that worrying habit, isn't it? Hope you have a happy day :D

    • Robert Erich profile image

      Robert Erich 5 years ago from California

      This is a good point you make. Although I seldom worry about being too happy, I do often worry about things I cannot control. It is better, as you say, to simply enjoy life and role with the punches when they come. Great article.