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How To Get Yourself Injured At Work

Updated on October 27, 2011

Ten Health And Safety At Work Dont's

Here is how to get yourself injured at work wherever you work and we have some special tips for people today so take note and there maybe a few bonus tips if you're lucky!

Number one: Don't read any signs whatsoever at work, they only serve as reminders anyway and plus who needs reminding of potential hazards when you could get a few days off work.

Number two: Try and eat and drink at electrical machinery and computers as you want to be lazy right? do this as often as you can.

Number three: Don't wear protective equipment as it is simply not fashionable, try to wear loose fitting and garments that have belts hanging and always keep your tie hanging out!!

Number four: Don't wear eye goggles, just wear contact lenses they cut down on face space!

Number five: Always run down corridors instead of walking, who knows you may get excited by skidding along the smooth corridor floor.

Number six: Drink and drugs work best at work so abuse these whlist operating machinery.

Number seven: Never ever wash your hands after going to the toilet, germs are everywhere so how will anyone find out they came from your smelly hands.

Number eight: Always lean back on your computer chair and do a wheely as this helps your back.

Number nine: Don't take any breaks, don't sleep, don't breath, sit down shut up!

Number ten: Climb your workplaces building and do the truffle shuffle right on the roof, right at the edge!!!!

Disclaimer: Try To Be safe at work!!

Health And Safety At Work

Be safe at work and get injured!!
Be safe at work and get injured!!

Comments About Work Injuries More How To Tips!

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    • waynet profile imageAUTHOR

      Wayne Tully 

      9 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

      Cheers k@ri! I'm a fan of the last one, doing the truffle shuffle on the top of your works building, because I can just imagine me doing it!!

    • k@ri profile image

      Kari Poulsen 

      9 years ago from Ohio

      I love Number 1--Don't read any signs at work...I attempt this for the sake of my ignorance! :D

    • waynet profile imageAUTHOR

      Wayne Tully 

      9 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

      Cheers GM

      I was going to add bold text for each point but I was in a rush to get it published as my laptop battery was running out, will do it later!

      Cheers now!

    • GeneriqueMedia profile image

      GeneriqueMedia 

      9 years ago from Earth

      Haha, very funny man. =)

      I have one suggestion though...maybe embolden or use italics more? Just to break up the text a bit. =P

      But great HubMob!

    • Mezo profile image

      Motaz 

      9 years ago from Egypt

      nice hub :) a good idea ..

      keep it up

    • Dame Scribe profile image

      Dame Scribe 

      9 years ago from Canada

      I injure myself with a simple walk on a dark road, love the Hub, lol

    • waynet profile imageAUTHOR

      Wayne Tully 

      9 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

      I thought I'd go for the blunt approach to health and safety at work!

      Cheers Sweetie and mom the mighty!

    • Mighty Mom profile image

      Susan Reid 

      9 years ago from Where Left is Right, CA

      Clever idea, Waynet! I've always wanted a workers' comp claim. Never pulled it off, tho.

    • SweetiePie profile image

      SweetiePie 

      9 years ago from Southern California, USA

      I love your take on this one, and hopefully it will help some people think twice about not such good practices.

    • waynet profile imageAUTHOR

      Wayne Tully 

      9 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

      No just mild injuries!

    • profile image

      ladyvenus 

      9 years ago

      We don't want accident lols.

    • waynet profile imageAUTHOR

      Wayne Tully 

      9 years ago from Hull City United Kingdom

      Yes. aren't I clever!?

    • Princessa profile image

      Wendy Iturrizaga 

      9 years ago from France

      Reverse psychology?

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