How to Bring More Positivity into Your Life

It can be so easy to slip into a negative pattern or a toxic way of life. It seems to be human nature to focus on what is wrong instead of the good in life. With all of the negativity in the news and media we can easily end up depressed and feel hopeless. We need positivity in our lives more than ever.

No matter how bad things seem to be there is always something to be thankful for. Everyone has something good in their life. Instead of focusing on what is lacking in your life focus on what you want to bring into your life and what is good in your life right now. What you focus on expands. If you focus on the bad that is all you will see. If you focus on fear it will draw in more negativity. Instead, look for the good in life. When you feel bad sit down and write down your blessings. Focus on all that is good in your life. It does not hurt anything to count your blessings daily and be thankful for them. You can start a Gratitude Journal and make time daily to write in it. The more grateful you are the more blessings you will bring into your life.

Positive affirmations are a good way to be more positive. The energy we put out in the world returns to us. If we send out negative energy that is what we will attract in return. If we think positive, speak positive, and live a positive life as much as possible we will attract more blessings to us. A positive affirmation app is a good reminder of how we should think. I use the free app from the Google Play store called “My Affirmations.” Positive affirmations pop up on my phone during the day and help me to maintain positivity. I can be having a frustrating moment and the affirmation that pop ups on my phone can encourage me and get me back on track.

Sometimes we can be our own worst enemy. We can be guilty of being very critical of ourselves. Especially considering how much social media influences our lives today. We do not see behind the scenes and what someone's life is “really” like. We only see what the individual wants us to see which is typically the “perfect” or best moments. We compare ourselves to others and all of the “photo shopped” (retouched) and filtered photos on social media and beat ourselves up for not being perfect or good enough and feel less than because we don't have all of the material things we see our social media contacts with. It is a huge injustice to compare ourselves to others. We all have our own journey and we are all as unique as our own finger print.

Stop the negative self-talk. Start doing mirror work. Mirror work is where you look in the mirror and compliment yourself. Start out picking out things you like about yourself and compliment yourself on them daily until you can tell yourself, “I love you” without crying or feeling uncomfortable about it. This is a good way to build up healthy self-esteem and self-confidence. For more on mirror work please check out Louise Hay's book titled, “Mirror Work.”

Learn how to deal with stress in healthy ways if you have not already. Leave alcohol alone when your depressed because it is a depressant and will only make you feel worse. It will magnify your negative emotions. Drugs and alcohol are like bandaids (a covering) and will not heal your life. Take up yoga and/or meditation. Exercise is an excellent way to relieve stress. Take a walk in nature. If you have a pet spend more quality time with them. Take time out to connect with nature. Feed the birds and squirrels and observe their beauty. Take time out for yourself to reflect and think. It is okay to have “Me” time to be alone, relax, and do something you love or just “do nothing” if that is what you need. You do not have to explain yourself to others and can just “be.”

Do you have anyone in your life that makes you feel “overwhelmed” or extremely “drained” when they come around? Most people do and these people can suck and drain the life out of us. These people are the “energy vampires” in our life. If we want more positivity in our life we need to at least distance if not totally remove these people from our lives and set up some healthy boundaries. I had to learn the hard way not to be a “people pleaser” and set some healthy boundaries so that I could create a much healthier and happier life for myself.

In the past I felt so used, abused, and victimized. I kept wondering why I attracted these toxic people and situations to me. I was not respecting myself or my time so how could I expect others to show me proper respect? If we want respect we must be more assertive and learn how to say no, mean it, and maintain healthy boundaries. It can be scary at first but is liberating and so well worth it in the end.

I had to wake up and realize my self-worth and value. I had to realize that I was worthy of a better life. I had to learn that when people lash out or are cruel to me it is not because I am inferior or lacking in any way. Their behavior had nothing to do with me and everything to do with who they are. Like the old saying, “Misery loves company.” Happy people do not harm others. “When another person makes you suffer, it is because he suffers deeply within himself, and his suffering is spilling over. He does not need punishment; he needs help. That’s the message he is sending.” -Thich Nhat Hanh

Honor yourself and your feelings. If something does not feel right it probably is not. If you want to say, “no” do not feel bad about it. Do not beat yourself up for needing time to yourself. It is safe to be honest about your feelings. Even if your feelings seem inappropriate or at odds with others they matter. Always honor yourself and how you feel. The most important relationship you will ever have in life is the one that you have with yourself! At the end of the day you have to live with yourself. You set the tone for how people treat you. You do not have to be a “people pleaser” to have friends. The right friends will respect you and how you feel.

Be your own best friend. It is not selfish to put your needs first because you can not pour from an empty cup. If you allow people and the world to bleed you dry you will have nothing left for your family and the people who depend on you. Energy vampires and other toxic people will bleed you completely dry and walk away. You will be left to pick up the pieces all alone. On the other hand, true friends will respect you and be there for you.

You cannot build Rome in a day. Lasting changes will take time. It took a long time for life to get messy and fall apart. As a result, it will take time to create healthy habits and change life for the better. It will take a lot of time and hard work but I assure you that it will be well worth it! Only a fool knows everything. We will be learning and growing for the rest of our lives.

Everyone deserves a more positive and healthy life. Lasting change take time. Be patient with yourself and do not give up. Do not beat yourself up if you fall back into your old bad habits. Just start over the next day and keep trying. Be kind and gentle with yourself. Reward yourself for small steps. By being more mindful and with daily practice you can and will bring more positivity to your life.