How to Handle Life's Struggles?
You definitely wouldn’t want to be in the dark for a long time. It’s now time to start a new beginning. See for yourself the positive impact of such a difficult time you have been through. As Confucius once said, “A gem cannot be polished without friction, nor a man perfected without trials.” Now, how do you start to live a new life?
1. Forgive the past.
They say the hardest is to forgive. It’s a process. It’s reminding yourself everyday to do it because you want to free yourself of further pain. You no longer want to reminisce past disappointments, feelings of betrayal and hurtful actions or words towards you. You no longer want to be held as a victim.
Tell yourself that you will no longer run towards pain. Enough of thinking of how to take revenge - to inflict hurt. You did what you know is right at that moment. Going back to your senses, you realize that those bad people are gone. No longer there to hurt you --why rewind everything in your mind. Relinquish the plan to be vindictive. Trust that time will reveal to you -- who matter and who no never was.
2. Value the gifts gained from the struggles.
The greatest gifts you will receive from every struggle are the gift of friendship and valuable lessons. You may tell yourself you had enough - enough pain, conflict and struggles. After much thought, struggles will reveal to you the people you can trust - who stood the test of time. They are willing to take the difficult journey with you as your protector, shield and comforter.
The hardest lessons to learn will give you much strength as you face tougher struggles. They are actually propelling you to be a better individual. The greater pain you experience from such struggle, the bolder you become. Knocking down an insurmountable problem before seem so impossible, but now you know that nothing is too big for you to handle. Now, you won’t be annihilated by problems.
3. Adopt a new mindset.
People operate in different ways. Some sulk themselves in sadness, disappointment, and fear in the face of struggles; others adopt a positive attitude. Remember that you have the power to change your thinking, to turn the struggles in your mind to bring about a positive change in you life. Remember that your destiny is not stuck in the past. Your destiny is in God’s hands. Your life is too precious to be spent with negative people who will never ever lift you up.
Constantly remind yourself that this life is a gift. You have to continue your journey and start a new life. You will only find the right path when you let go of negativity. Don’t carry that burden with you. Admittedly, it’s hard to trust again. Turn your negative self talk into the following:
- I know I can find a trustworthy friend. Now, I know how I wanted to be treated.
- I know I can find the right people who can help me with my career. Now, I know what kind of mentors I want to be associated with - morally upright, compassionate and intellectual.
- I know I can find the right place for me to grow. It will be a place filled with honest, dignified, compassionate and honorable people.
4. Believe that every struggle comes with a purpose.
Every struggle will show you what you like, how you want to live your new life and the people who you want to be with. The struggles are meant to bring clarity into your life. They are meant to help you discover your purpose. You might have been a victim of abusive relationship. You now help raise awareness against abuse and empower the victims. How do you do this? Believe in yourself. Believe in your capacity to build the new life that you want to live.
Believe that there is a purpose for every struggle you went through. You had to go through some rough patch to be in a better position -- to be better than the inflictors. Believe that everything happened for you to reach your highest potential -- to be the best version of yourself.