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Out of tragedy...

Updated on March 23, 2017

When you’re coping with grief it can feel like your world has been turned upside down. Nothing can really prepare you for surge of emotions that envelop you and the effect they will have on your thinking. You can find yourself just ‘going through the motions’ during the first few weeks or even months, feeling numb and detached, as if in a dream-like state. It’s hard to know where you are, let alone how to move forward. Yet with a positive mindset, these times can be a rebirth of sorts, a painful start to a journey of personal re-discovery.

Moments of realisation
As time passes and you feel more able process what has happened, you inevitably find yourself having profound thoughts on life. It’s a stage of grief when you might have a heightened sense of your own mortality and our existence can appear desperately fragile. Each day feels more precious than ever, prompting you to examine some of your own life-decisions. It’s in these moments when you can experience moments of unquestionable clarity, that if chosen to act on, can be used to propel your life in a more positive direction.

Maybe you’ve been in an unhappy relationship for many years, or found yourself stuck a soul-destroying job that has been getting you nowhere. It could be that you once played a musical instrument and have allowed the distractions of everyday life to smother your creative side. Whatever choices you have made, losing someone can lead to you evaluating your life in a more honest way and can give you a much needed reality-check. Once aware of the truth in your situation, it becomes hard to ignore, and with a little positive thinking can provide the inspiration to start forging a new, more fulfilling course.

Changing things is rarely easy, especially when you’re hurting, but feeling like you’re doing something constructive can go some way to help with the healing. Changing the dynamics of your life can be cathartic and empowering as well as giving you a sense that the loss of a person wasn’t in vain. Allowing yourself to recollect happy memories you had with that person can be upsetting, but it can also have an energizing effect and can help you to feel their support throughout.

Good advice
It’s true when people say that the loss of a loved one is something you never get over, but there are many valuable things than can be learned from the experience to find solace in, things that might otherwise have taken years to understand. Rather feel alone when you have big decisions to face, turn to them for advice, as the sentiment underlying in their words would in no doubt be to follow your heart.

Losing someone can provide the catalyst to make the changes necessary to find some much needed balance and harmony in your life, something which you know they would have wanted you to find. So take forward the good times you’ve spent with them, the conversations, the laughs and their ongoing support, and thank them always for their parting gift.

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