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Stress Management - Help with Overwhelming Stress

Updated on March 31, 2017

Feeling Stressed?

Feeling Stressed Seems to be a Part of Modern Life...

We all face stress at some point in our lives. Most people handle the day-to-day stress relatively well, but there are times when it all seems just too much. Being prepared mentally and having a few techniques "up your sleeve" to deal with stress is a good idea.

I have written some techniques that have worked well enough for me that I wish to share them in the hope they give you some relief from your daily stress and even help in times of extreme stress.

I am an optimist and always look at the bright side. My life has had a few tragedies and I am not all that extraordinary. It is just life “happening”. We all encounter some of these in the normal course of life.

What do I exactly mean about tragedy?

Sure there are the biggies, like tornadoes, floods, earthquakes and wars…those affect huge numbers of people; there are other crimes which again are sensational and reported by the media. They affect a smaller portion of persons. Both create a lot of damage emotionally and require professional help.

There are also the quiet tragedies happening in families every day, the passing of loved ones. Conflict at work and home. Personal injury or illness. Even a loss of a beloved pet.

Who among us, of a certain age, has not lost a beloved family member or friend? We all have - or will. It is simply a fact of life.

When I was young, everyone I knew was hale and hearty. M y parents were healthy and I had the energy to keep going no matter what. Sure there were bad days along the way, but nothing overwhelming.

It wasn't until I was 29 that the first overwhelming event happened. There was no reasoning, no remedy, no answer. I lost a brother to a traffic accident; a totally senseless one at that. He was a passenger in a car. The gamut of emotion was unbelievable. There was no relief, none at all. The stress level was unbearable at the time.


"One must not let oneself be overwhelmed by sadness".
Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis

I ranted at at the injustice of it all. I was devastated. Six years later I lost my other brother. I went through the same process, but I had learned some techniques by then. However, the feelings were overwhelming.

Luckily years passed before my spouse suffered a stroke and the resulting turmoil that ensued, I won’t go into it, I managed to get through.

Only a year after my husband’s passing my stepmother was diagnosed with stage four cancer and within the year I was arranging her funeral. Was I overwhelmed? Yes, and that is an understatement. I had to reinvent or find myself, because all my references to who I was were disappearing. Three years later I lost my adoptive mother to cancer as well.

What helped get me through?

Focusing on the good parts of the day…like sunshine and the pattern of clouds, birds singing and watching waves crashing to shore….and yes, importantly, the moral support of a few close friends and family…and solitude …just being quiet and trying to take care of myself in all that turmoil...giving myself room to grieve.

Stress in many forms...

We all need shelter, food and clothes. After that, in a devastating situation one needs quiet and rest. Being overwhelmed is a signal the system is overloaded with stress and needs time out; a break from the stress.

The stress comes in as many forms as one cares to imagine...

Financial ruin…it happens from divorce or squandering spouses or other unforeseen circumstances. Loss of jobs, loss of health, loss of dignity, loss of everything.

Then there is the everyday stress of just too much to do and too little time to do it in. We have all been there at one point or another.

Somewhere in that situation, the soul needs rest to restore the equilibrium. That was the one thing that kept me from being completely overwhelmed. REST. I refused to take on any further stress, if I had a choice.

One remedy that gives solace is: prayer. It is amazing what the simple process of prayer does. No one to censor your words, outpouring of raw emotion that must be expressed and dealt with. Liberating. Read on for other remedies that worked for me.

Sometimes life is dull and gray ...
Sometimes life is dull and gray ... | Source
Source

Getting some control back

Though we control much of our lives, there is much completely out of our control, no matter how well we plan. Those are the tragedies I speak of that can overwhelm.

Here are my suggestions that worked for me...until the clouds lifted...and eventually, they did!

  • Focus on what you can do at this very minute and do that little thing (you will feel a little better doing it)
  • Let your mind go blank for periods of time, listen to music that relaxes you (it is busy in your head and you need to clean house so to speak, so you can deal with the moment)
  • Go out in nature and away from noise if you are able…the calming affect is wonderful
  • Talk to a friend, tell them your problem, but do not keep repeating it…tell it to “get it out” and then focus on your friend as much as you can muster. The change of focus helps. They can share your burden but don't stress them out!
  • Remember to eat, but try not to eat too much
  • Find a group that shares your problem…use their resources to find solutions
  • Spend some time alone to think upon what is the next step you can realistically take
  • Get as much rest as you can get
  • Take good care of yourself


Ten Tips for Stress Management

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  • roanna profile image

    roanna 6 years ago from Virginia

    First relaxation video is great

  • Scribenet profile image
    Author

    Scribenet 6 years ago from Ontario, Canada

    Roanna...Glad you enjoyed the relaxation video.I thought it was great as well...nothing like the sounds of nature to take you away for the 26 minutes it plays! Thanks for stopping by. Cheers!

  • dukeny21 profile image

    dukeny21 6 years ago

    Your hub touched my heart. Thank you.

  • thougtforce profile image

    Christina Lornemark 6 years ago from Sweden

    Scribinet, you have really had your share of tragedies and more. I always admire the human strength that is there when needed. And as you say, there is no choice; we must go on in some way.

    I can so relate to your description of overload and the need for rest and quite. It is no use to try and run away from difficult feelings because they will catch up eventually anyway. There are always some tragedies in a lifetime and you have given some very good advices here. This hub is written from experience and I got a lump in my throat reading about all your hard times.

    Wonderful hub. I push all buttons possible on this one!

    Tina

  • Scribenet profile image
    Author

    Scribenet 6 years ago from Ontario, Canada

    dukeny.Thank you for your comments! I am glad to have touched your heart; it is what drives the writing. What good is experience if one doesn't share it? :)!

    Tina, thank you so much for your kind comments!

    Human strength is there in amazing quantities when needed...however, when faced with such circumstances, there is a certain amount of care one has to give oneself first so that there is that strength to go on and be there for others.

    It is so easy to get overwhelmed and feel out of control...so I thought I would share what worked for me and hopefully I will be able to help, in some small way, someone going through difficult times, whatever they are.

    Thanks again for your comments! Maggie

  • b. Malin profile image

    b. Malin 6 years ago

    A Wonderful and Inspiring Read Scribenet. I too would like to think (most of the time) that I am an Optimist. Life is not always kind, we lost my niece to Suicide five years ago. I became my Sister's strength...Strength I didn't know I had. Thanks for the Video too.

  • Scribenet profile image
    Author

    Scribenet 6 years ago from Ontario, Canada

    b. Malin, Thank you. That is exactly what I meant about strength. You can get it. Where it comes from, I have no idea, but with it you can help those you love as you did for your sister even though you were both grieving. My condolences to you both. I am glad you like the video...a little reprieve in a busy world! Hugs!

  • glowingrocks profile image

    glowingrocks 6 years ago from New York

    Life is full of ups and downs.Little time to rest and relax in this busy world we live in today.Thanks for sharing these useful points with us.

  • Scribenet profile image
    Author

    Scribenet 6 years ago from Ontario, Canada

    glowingrocks,you are so correct!

    Modern life is hectic and we get lost in the hustle and bustle of life...it is nice to pass on what works for me, when the world gets to be too much,too busy, too loud and too complicated! Thank you for your comments! Have a peaceful, relaxing day!

  • chspublish profile image

    chspublish 6 years ago from Ireland

    You have learnt so much from your life and how to take care of yourself and now others. Well done. The video music is gorgeous.

  • Scribenet profile image
    Author

    Scribenet 6 years ago from Ontario, Canada

    Hi chpublish! Thank you for your kind comments.

    Those tragedies were difficult to experience, but the human spirit is resilient and age does give a perspective of the big picture. It is life happening!

    I have learned to bless the people that have been a part of my life and celebrate the joy and love they gave.

    Knowing they would want me to go on and honor their memory seems to be part of the process for me.

    My heart goes out to those that go through the process,which is always emotionally painful... so hopefully there is something of value to help someone in any unfortunate situation they may find themselves in.

  • marcoujor profile image

    Maria Jordan 6 years ago from Jeffersonville PA

    Scribenet~~ I LOVE this article/ your views and outlook... I am currently looking for HUBS to link to my latest article and I am linking this, as it ties together beautifully to me...

    Thank you for an inspirational read~~ Voted UP, BEAUTIFUL & AWESOME...!

  • Scribenet profile image
    Author

    Scribenet 6 years ago from Ontario, Canada

    marcoujor... Thank you so much for the link to your article! Links are always appreciated! Thank you also for your kind comments. I am pleased you found this article inspiring...it is great when an article works and especially wonderful when it inspires! That is the best reward for me as a writer!

  • tonymac04 profile image

    Tony McGregor 6 years ago from South Africa

    Excellent and uplifting. Thanks so much.

    Love and peace

    Tony

  • Scribenet profile image
    Author

    Scribenet 6 years ago from Ontario, Canada

    Hi Tony, I am pleased you found this article to your liking; I value your comments! I wanted to send the message to all who are struggling in some way in the hope, that, there is some comfort in this Hub.

    Thanks for stopping by! Cheers!

    Maggie

  • Om Paramapoonya profile image

    Om Paramapoonya 5 years ago

    Scribenet, your personal experience, optimistic attitude and practical advice are very inspiring. I've been a bit overwhelmed lately. Glad I found and read this hub. Thanks. :)

  • Scribenet profile image
    Author

    Scribenet 5 years ago from Ontario, Canada

    Thank you, Om for the compliment.

    I wrote this Hub knowing how bad it can be to have overwhelming anxiety with life's events. It is helpful to share the steps that worked for me to reduce the anxiety until life resumes a more normal path. Sometimes you just need to step away for a little while and take care of yourself!

    So...take care! Cheers!

  • jpcmc profile image

    JP Carlos 5 years ago from Quezon CIty, Phlippines

    It's so easy to be overwhelmed especially at work. The stresses can really take a toll on anyone. But overcoming it is a matter of slowing down and focusing. The book Focusing by Gendlin is a great resource I used to help me focus.

    Great tips - especially the one on taking care of yourself. Many forget to do this.

  • Scribenet profile image
    Author

    Scribenet 5 years ago from Ontario, Canada

    Hi jpcmc! Welcome to HubPages and thank you for the extra resources! Hopefully, the book will help someone just when they need it!

    I agree being overwhelmed one tends to try to speed up, when the best idea is to slow down and focus on priorities. Sometimes, we just cannot "do it all"!

    Thanks for stopping by! Cheers!

  • stanwshura profile image

    stanwshura 4 years ago

    You did a fantastic job on this hub! Comprehensive, an easy read, and it's even multi-media! I am printing it out and reading it again.

  • Scribenet profile image
    Author

    Scribenet 4 years ago from Ontario, Canada

    Thank you, stanwshura! These tips came from tough times and they were invaluable to me. I felt motivated to write them out in the hopes they could offer some relief to others as well.

    I am so glad for the feedback. :)

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