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The Boy Teacher and the Father Student#70; The Sound of Silence

Updated on August 24, 2019
Ericdierker profile image

Eric started working with children when he was still one himself. He taught first aid through Scouting. All the way to preaching to youth.

He Looks Up and Not At Me

Who wants answers instead of the quest for them.
Who wants answers instead of the quest for them. | Source

Kids Are Lie Detectors

We do not know when it started. It just happened. Silence. Silence and more Silence. The children and wives do silence and more silence. Sound is silence. Not the sound of your voice. Cruising down the highway with that noise. Crashing waves. Running rivers. Birds. Breath. Feet walking. There is a beating sound that you can feel holding hands. A silent hug may be the best. The sun and the rain. Yes the sun makes noise if you remain quiet that which is warming or cooling makes sound like a board expanding and contracting. The sounds of silence are wonderful.

I have not figured out love. Perhaps love makes a sound, I know that hate does. You can hear and feel it. That hate from not being loved makes a noise. So it would make sense that love is the sound of a comfortable Silence. If I were hating something I would not like the sound of my silence.

Elder Boy

B: How about we just shut up and enjoy the road trip.

F: Fair enough but it seems we don’t spend enough time together and so we should communicate.

B: Maybe that is why we should stay quiet and just enjoy presence.

F: Dude you are trippy because you make noise for a living.

B: That is part of it dad.

Switch to a canyon hike – a big canyon hike.

B: Common dad pick up the pace to get to camp.

F: Go on I like being right here, right now.

B: Dad you are the last in all of us. I can’t leave you alone.

F: Son I need to smell and see and not hear the chatter, plus you know I am pooped out a good rest will to me well.

B: I can’t leave you here alone. You’re too old and feeble.

F: Jerk! Now leave me be.

B: But that rope climb you should not do by yourself.

F: Good point son. Let’s go. But slow down so I can see and hear.

B: You know you are just making excuses for being out of shape.

F: Yes that must be part of it. But what good is being in shape if all that means is that you hurry. Maybe I am getting older and out of shape so that I slow down and listen.

Now this 30 something guy and I really do have conversations like that. Just could because we both have degrees in philosophy. Or maybe he is just a great teacher.

Just To Think On

Before Sunrise

Before Sunrise
Before Sunrise | Source

I Do Not Get It

We switch here to a youngest daughter just turning 30 in a few days. Probably more educated than me out of Berkeley. She is a super conservationist. She has helped me have as close to a Zero Carbon Footprint as I can. A full on treat to me.

D: Dad you have to plant more.

F: Check out all those weeds. We just think we should “grow” things but I say we must let them grow by themselves. I know you get that. I do not water weeds or trees.

D: Good point, you are starting to get it.

F: Hey check this out you can hear them. The bougainvillea’s make a noise in the sun or the breeze. Hold my hand and listen.

D: Wow that is really cool. The flowers are great.

F: Do I look like a weirdo not pulling all the weeds in my rose garden.

D: Who cares? Shssh I can hear the bees.

F: Thanks for telling me to listen to them and give them water and such.

D: Let’s listen to this new music.

F: Ok, I will try to just shut up.

D: Basically impossible for you dad.

F: Hey in that canyon that you have hiked with us it was so bitchin cool we saw an owl but the coolest part was that we heard it’s wings flapping.

D: Wow, Gabe can just be just and quiet and listen for that?

F: Do not look at me. You taught him that. Thanks.

D: You should come hear the river where I live it sounds like Oak Creek.

F: That is the only place I ever got your mom to stop and be quiet. Does she still do that.

D: Dad that is unrealistic. You do know that most people can’t do that?

And the sound of silence beats down on us like a perfect day in the sun. No good for us to convince each other but all to the good for understanding each other.

Please Stand By Me

Somewhere Near Cu Chi

Love wins.
Love wins. | Source

Beyond a Father

The youngest, Gabe on the way home from school and we stop under a crab apple tree in the heat.

F: Son do you know you are a genius like your Hay your big sister?

B: Yes I understand it but E beats me in math and C beats me in reading.

F: Do not think of it as a gift, think of it as a burden and a responsibility.

B: Dad I don’t get it. So I am super smart?

F: Like smarter than your mom or teacher. Take my word for it, it is not fun. Maybe you are smarter than me.

B: That makes no sense to me. I want to be like R and just have fun.

F: That is the most fun of it, you can have a blast with learning and a blast with doing silly stuff. You see you friends who beat you at school are pushed and taught over and over again. You just love to learn. Do not look at me.

B: I guess I get it. Is that why you make me play. Even though I am in the top five worldwide in my game?

F: I reckon so son. I just do my best. They call me one of those because I get equation, E=mc2, kind of like E is for energy, M kind of for mass and C for the speed of light like 2X’s the billionth. And that rascal of the Trinity. We just talk about that stuff but you pretty much get it which is scary.

B: I do not want to scare anyone that is like a bully.

I Am Watching

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    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      3 weeks ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Dora we are having so much fun it is cray cray as we say. Big deal yesterday as Gabe did bad on a test. Wow did we have fun getting into that study. It is like he gets infected by my love to learn. (OK a little bored with my lecturing ;-)

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      3 weeks ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Chitrangada the pleasure of these are all mine. I am glad you enjoy. My youngest is getting into areas in school that I just love like earth science and geography. We have already studied them but the fun this year will be outstanding.

    • MsDora profile image

      Dora Weithers 

      3 weeks ago from The Caribbean

      First you have sheer fun engaging in these conversations with your children, then you preserve them in HP articles. You could never be bored for the rest of your life. You've got the good life, Eric.

    • ChitrangadaSharan profile image

      Chitrangada Sharan 

      3 weeks ago from New Delhi, India

      Interesting conversations with children of different age groups. It’s really important to have conversations with our children, even if there are disagreements. When they grow up, they may have different viewpoints. But, that’s okay. Spending time with them, is what really matters.

      Enjoyed going through another one in this interesting series.

      Thanks for sharing.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      3 weeks ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Bill I had to clip them early this morning the were doing the "choke them out" deal. But I clipped them rather than "pull" them. I was looking next door to see if life gets better. Oh well it don't.

    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 

      3 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

      Any man who allows the weeds to grow is a friend of mine. Weeding just seems like a colossal waste of time and energy to me.....high five, buddy!

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      4 weeks ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Pamela, up early here. My boy is sound asleep. So I sat on his bed and just listened to him breathe. They call me crazy but ask why? I reply that I listen. Most folk do not. So it makes me strange to them.

    • lifegate profile image

      William Kovacic 

      4 weeks ago from Pleasant Gap, PA

      You got the whole family involved - you pout it together so nicely. Easy to read with the lessons under the surface.

    • Pamela99 profile image

      Pamela Oglesby 

      4 weeks ago from Sunny Florida

      It is interesting to read your conversations with your children of various ages. Listening to nature and letting the weeds grow is probably a good thing. Sitting or walking together in a comfortable silence is nice. I like to be with someone where I don't have to carry the conversation and it is just nice. Thanks for sharing another good article. Have a wonderful Sunday, full of love Eric

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      4 weeks ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Thank you Flourish,

      My nephew who lived with us for 5 years gave me some really good headphones. They have great sound but I also found that leaving them on but sound off, blocks out sound. I like it.

    • FlourishAnyway profile image

      FlourishAnyway 

      4 weeks ago from USA

      This was thought provoking. We have too much meaningless noise in our lives and don’t stop to tune in to any particular sounds enough to find meaning.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      4 weeks ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Linda now this ain't no joshing. At nine I was trained to track. We would go 20 miles from man and start running for a mile. We would find Elk urine and crap and spread it around our shoes and hands. Our job was to find the Elk and his path without disturbing him. I am quite certain I have crawled over a mile on my knees.

      A butterfly gives out a noise and a humming bird leaves a chirp, more like a tick tick tick, you can track an owl. My boy and lay silent for some time the other day to track a squirrel.

      I just love silence.

    • Carb Diva profile image

      Linda Lum 

      4 weeks ago from Washington State, USA

      Eric, I love all of this, snatches of conversations with 3 of your children, but (for me) the best part was this "Maybe I am getting older and out of shape so that I slow down and listen."

      Uncle Arthur(itis) has put a severe damper on my movements, so I am reduced to smelling the roses instead of pruning them, and I've heard some marvelous things. Did you know that hummingbirds "sing?" I've heard them buzz and flit around, but I witnessed one perched on the fine wire of some chicken mesh (deer protector) and he was singing in a wee tiny hummingbird-sized voice. Deer are not silent. Of course, the males cause a ruckus when in the rut, but the babies cry for their moms if they get lost.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      4 weeks ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Ruby I was doing my sitting thing in my garden and a beetle type creature pinched me. I decided to punish the thing. So I lectured it for five minutes and it ran away.

      So often silence attracts and words chase away.

      Although I must admit I got a good laugh.

    • always exploring profile image

      Ruby Jean Richert 

      4 weeks ago from Southern Illinois

      I like to watch the birds come to my feeder's, you can hear their wings flap. I like silence too. Have a great weekend...

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      4 weeks ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Wonderful Liz but it took me into my late 30's to shut up. My wife is like a wind up toy. Get her started and off she goes. But it winds down. Fun in our home.

      I caution you my good friend to listen to every word. Too soon they are too gone.

    • Eurofile profile image

      Liz Westwood 

      4 weeks ago from UK

      I like the Simon and Garfunkel song. It resonates especially with me as my mother talks non-stop, regardless of whether anyone is listening. So I really appreciate times of silence.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      4 weeks ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Ah Mel you slay me with words. Down in Quarry Canyon a fifty foot high one not trimmed ever. The wind gently whips through and it is the creek and the rustle that you can hear. Home to birds and a near crackling sound as you lay under it in the shade of day.

      Oops sorry I do not mean to wax on not eloquently.

      Off to Chula Veesta bay to just float hearing the gentle waves lap upon the shore. Hopefully a Pelican or two.

    • Mel Carriere profile image

      Mel Carriere 

      4 weeks ago from San Diego California

      This was a wonderful story. I praise you for giving your children some intellectual freedom.

      Have you ever listened to the sound of the Palm Trees? If you ever stop and listen, you can hear the wind whipping through the palm trees. It makes a sound like a dull roar. Remember that expression - keep it to a dull roar? That is what it is like.

      This was super entertaining, with a lot of hidden meanings.

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