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Things You Can Do To Increase Your Memory

Updated on January 26, 2014

Are you finding your memory fading or becoming as useful as a can-opener at a 'Raw Food Convention'? Do you want to be able to recall things better like how to spel wurds? Are you the kind of person who has a selective memory that is becoming so selective you can only remember your own name during a solar eclipse?

Whatever the issues you might have when it comes to your memory, there is always something you can do to improve it, or so I was once told, if I could remember who said it. At any rate, continue on for some good tips on how to improve your memory and retain the information you need do...something...I forget what, but it will come back to me by the next paragraph, I betcha!

The Next Paragraph

In order to maintain a strong memory, be sure to remain active in a social context.

This works to keep you alert, because when you are alone you don't need to listen to what you are thinking the way you need to listen to what someone is saying when you are with another person.

Hence you need to be attentive in a social context and this improves your memory and keeps your spirits high, your hair in place and your underpants from riding up.

If you stay at home alone all the time, you brain will not be engaged and stimulated and might just take a vacation without leaving you a number where it can be contacted. Engaging in stimulating conversation with others will keep your mind occupied and increase your memory-glands, and as we all know, every woman wants to increase her 'mamery-glans'.

If you need to be able to recall and remember something, try associating it with a humorous image. For example if I need to a-fix the password to my computer solidly in my head, I might link it to an image: say of Newt Gingrich wearing gold-lame high heels. Chances are I won't remember the password but I will certainly have a good laugh trying.

Dori and her Short-Term Memory are Notorious


Short-term and Long-term Memory

Science tells us we all have two kinds of memory: short-term and long-term. Short term is cheaper and you can buy it at Target and Wallmart, but long-term is only sold on TV and you need a credit card. If you wish to remember something special, try moving it from your short-term to you long-term memory, and then back again several times, while eating a pepperoni-stick and smiling at an Elm tree. This will stamp the fact so indelibly in your mind it will appear as a marque running across your forehead every time you think of it.

De-Fragment Your Memories: Remember to Sleep

If you want a state-of-the-art,all-systems-go kind of memory, then you should remember to get your sleep and give your brain a chance to de-fragment your memories.. If not it will become like a computer that has files flung everywhere on the hard-drive and that forces it to take longer and longer to find those files.

When your brain is looking for a file, say, on 'how to cook an egg' and it has to dig through files on 'the love life of chickens', 'what came first the chicken or the egg?' and so on, before it can find the directions to cooking an egg...well that's going to take too much time and let's face it, your brain will probably get distracted by the clucking noises and forget what it was looking for.

Just remember this simple equation if you want to stay on the ball (and not fall off it and scrape your knee:)

brain function = the price of coffee beans during a heat-wave in Moo-Moo Equador divided by the number of times you blink while saying the word 'bodacious!' during a heat-wave times the square root of Justin Bieber's tax-return sin 20 yellow dolphins
brain function = the price of coffee beans during a heat-wave in Moo-Moo Equador divided by the number of times you blink while saying the word 'bodacious!' during a heat-wave times the square root of Justin Bieber's tax-return sin 20 yellow dolphins

Finally Don't Forget the Tip of Your Tongue

Have you ever tried to recall something and found it lying on the tip of your tongue? If so, you might try removing your tongue and washing it in a mild solution of vinegar and water. This will remove any memories which you can then place in a mason-jar for safe keeping.

Visualization techniques are a great tool to improve memory but only if you are good at making pictures in your head without the help of a slide-projector. If you are trying to memorize information such as lists or charts, try drawing the chart on a piece of paper, and then eat it with a Cesar Salad (no croutons--they tend to clog brain's passing-lane and will force you to drive behind a man wearing a hat with a little feather it in perched at 'a jaunty angle' and you don't want that.

Improve your memory with the "POPCORN" method


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