Time Came To Visit
Time came to visit this morning. It said it could not stay but that we could sit for a bit and share a cup of coffee. It was an unexpected visit, as Time has not been much of a friend lately. We have not visited for quite a while and it is clear, from that first awkward moment between us, that our friendship has suffered.
So Time looked me in the eye and said, “What is it that we need to talk about?”. I thought for a moment and said simply …”you”.
There was a quiet pause, and then Time said “Do you have a problem with me?”. And I replied respectfully…”yes, I guess I do”.
“Then explain it” Time said.
So I began to speak. “There is never enough of you. All my life I have planned for this time in my life. I thought there would be so much more of you to spend with friends and family. I have looked forward to pursuing hobbies and exploring new ones. Along the way I dreamed of sitting with sunsets and following tracks in the woods. My dreams were filled with the smiling faces of those I love and beautiful landscapes of places I would go.”
Again, Time looked at me and said “So, what’s the problem?”
The darker side of me
For a moment, I felt the hostility rising and I stared Time in the face and said “None of that is my reality. The reality is that the time I spend with family and friends is hard. It’s hard to watch your parents fade away and your friends hurting. What part of that do you not understand? And hobbies? What hobbies? There is too much to do now to enjoy hobbies. Look at the world. Don’t you see what is happening? It wasn’t supposed to be like this. Everywhere I look people are suffering from disease, poverty, abuse, or oppression. And, while I’m at this, what about my dreams? Were they so too much to hope for? Did I expect too much, so much that you felt you had to punish me by speeding up, making it harder all the time?”
Time just looked at me and waited.
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The wisdom of Time
A few minutes passed with neither of us speaking and when it seemed we had both become comfortable with the silence. Time said…
“I have not changed, in spite of what you think . I am the same today as I was yesterday. I am the same as I was twenty years ago. And, I will be the same tomorrow. What you do with me is up to you. Having enough of me is all about attitude and priorities. So, if you are not satisfied with me, you only need to adjust yourself. You see, I am you. You call me “Time” but I am really “you. You can control me if you choose to.
If there is not enough of me for you to spend time with friends and family, perhaps you should turn the computer off a few hours earlier. When you feel there is no time for hobbies you should ask yourself when did they become less important? If they really mattered you would be doing them because you are a person of passion. Have you considered that your hobbies may have changed when you weren’t looking? For as long as I have known you, you have said you wanted to make a difference in the world. Did you really think that was possible while you were spending time in those pottery classes? You know you weren’t any good at it. What about all that needlepoint you used to do? You never thought it was good enough to give away and I bet it’s all still sitting in the closet. What purpose did that serve? Sooner or later I had to show you that crafts were not your forte. God knows it took you long enough to see it.
You say your dreams are unfulfilled. Well, is it worth getting the cleaning done if it means missing the most beautiful sunset or finding that elusive track in the woods? Dreams are fine and necessary but you have to chase them. They don’t just come to you on a silver platter.
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There are advantages to being a dreamer. In our dreams, we can dream of a future where there is no more pain and suffering and where all people find joy in the simple things. I am a dreamer and I believe we can create a better world.
Your dreams have changed too, in case you haven’t noticed. I did that to you and I did it with purpose. Your heart is good and your family instilled certain values in you that made you malleable. I knew you had the heart for the fight and so I created opportunities for you to witness the struggle of others in the world hoping you would be moved in the direction of becoming the voice of those that had none. Yes, I have changed things and you are only beginning to realize it. Now, stop resisting and do what you can to make things different. You see, I am you and you can be me, for others in the world.”
And then, Time simply walked out the door and left me with myself.
I am Time. How I spend me, is my choice. I can waste me or I can use me. I have 1,440 minutes in every day and I can use them in ways that matter or I can use them in ways that I will not remember tomorrow. I think Time is my friend after all.
© 2012 Linda Crist, All rights reserved.
“For what it’s worth: it’s never too late or, in my case, too early to be whoever you want to be. There’s no time limit, stop whenever you want. You can change or stay the same, there are no rules to this thing. We can make the best or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it. And I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view. I hope you live a life you’re proud of. If you find that you’re not, I hope you have the courage to start all over again.”―Eric Roth,The Curious Case of Benjamin Button screenplay