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4 Ways to Reclaim Control Over Your Life

Updated on August 11, 2020
Avyukth profile image

Avyukth is a passionate individual who believes in living life on his own terms.


The world we live in is extremely complex. Every small action creates a chain of reaction. There are so many factors that shape our lives. We cannot control everything that happens. But we can definitely control how we respond to that. So here are some ways to reclaim your control over life.

Understand Your Triggers

All of us have certain triggers. These could be positive or negative. They are specific words, conditions or situations that evoke certain emotions in us. Knowingly or unknowingly, people are pulling these triggers causing you to feel a certain way.


Follow these steps to identify your triggers

  1. Choose a particular emotion. For example , let's take anger.
  2. Think about all the situations where you were overwhelmed with a certain anger.
  3. Analyse these situations and look for patterns.
  4. You will start noticing common features in all these situations. It could be betrayal, dishonesty, unwillingness to understand etc.
  5. You can conclude that these are your triggers for anger.
  6. Similarly, identify your triggers for other emotions as well.


One of the main reasons people lose control over their lives is because of their emotions. They don't understand why they are feeling a certain way. And they make decisions based on these temporary emotions. It also makes them an easy target for manipulation.


When you identify your triggers, you gain control over your emotions. You stop thinking with your heart and start thinking with your brain. This helps you make better decisions and be in control of your life.


Introspect regularly


We are all occupied with our busy lives. We rarely take a step back to just think about what we're doing. We just follow the herd. We do what is expected of us by society. But the truth is, we weren't meant to lead such small lives.


Life is supposed to be a beautiful and fulfilling experience. And it will not be so unless you do the things which you really want to do.The best way to figure out what you want in life is introspection. Spend time alone regularly. It is important that there are no distractions. The more time you spend with someone, the more you will find out about them. So naturally. through introspection you will start discovering yourself.

You can take a close look at your life. Figure out what you like and what you want to change. Figure out what is important to you. Start living according to those terms. This way you will have control over your thoughts, actions and ultimately your life.

Stick to your plan

When you don't plan things, you just end up reacting to situations. Out of sheer luck, if those situations are in your favor, you'll be happy. Otherwise, you will feel miserable. Your life should not happen by chance. You should make it happen by choice. This does not mean that you should plan out every single detail of your life. But you should at least have a sense of direction as to where you are headed.

Be rigid about your goals but flexible about your methods. There might be a 100 ways to reach your destination. If there's a roadblock, you change the route, not the destination. A ship needs to figure out the direction and then set sail. It can't just go to the middle of the sea and expect the waves to move it. It'll end up somewhere and might even crash.

You don't need to have your whole life planned. But it is important to have short term plans or goals. This will keep you on track and make you feel in control of your life.


Come to your own rescue


Don't be dependent on others. We keep waiting for someone else to create something magical. The movies have convinced us that one day a hero will arrive. Or that the government will change and a great leader will arise. And once that happens, everything will be fine. I am sorry to break your heart but that is not going to happen. When you think like this, it shows that you strongly believe that someone else controls your life.


If you want something, stop waiting for someone else to make it happen. Go out there and do what is necessary. There is no limit to human potential. You can achieve anything you set your mind to. You need to be bold and take the first step. Slowly, the right people will come along and the right things will happen.

© 2020 Avyukth Krishna


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