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Why the Law of Attraction Doesn't Work for Everyone

Updated on March 30, 2012

The Big Part Feelings Play in your Prayers

To look at something and to look for something involve completely different dynamics and will give different results. However, having said that not everyone seems to realise this.

If I spend hours watching baseball everyday then I would be looking at the activity and as such it wouldn't necessarily result in me becoming a better baseball player.

I think most people would accept that to become a better baseball player I would need to do something more than simply look at the game being played for hours on end.

There are many people who say they want to be wealthier but they feel poor. They never seem to make any connection between the feeling of poverty and the poor condition they find themselves in. No matter what a person says they want their condition betrays how they feel and what they are subconsciously motivated to achieve.

A wealthy person doesn't feel poor and a poor person does not feel rich. It is the feeling that dictates the condition you wish to create. Bottom line is, if you seek wealth then persistently feeling poor is ultimately going to sabotage what you consciously desire.

James Allen & Rhonda Byrne

There are many people who have read the book and watched the movie, The Secret by Rhonda Byrne but who have been unable to achieve their goals using the Law of Attraction described by the author. In this article I seek to explain why these people have failed and explain how their misunderstanding can explain why we don't always get what we pray for.

I would also highly recommend the book, As A Man Thinketh by James Allen because The Secret is based on the ideas put forward by James Allen in his book published in 1902. The ideas you will find in both of these books are not new and have been around for thousands of years to even before the time when Jesus uttered the words, “Seek and you shall find.”

Implementing the The Law of Attraction

In order to create what you want or to achieve your goals The Law of attraction requires that the following three basic elements be employed in your prayer:

  • Firstly, create what you want, clearly in your mind's eye, in as much detail as you can. That which you desire must appear real and as if you can see, touch, hear, smell and even taste it right now.

  • Secondly with your desire in your mind's eye, conjure up the feeling of expectancy. This is the kind of feeling you once felt as a child going to bed on Christmas Eve expecting to wake up in the morning to presents from Santa.

  • Thirdly, while keeping the goal in your mind's eye and the feelings of expectancy you must now add to this mix a feeling of thankfulness, the way you would feel after you have received what you have asked for. This is a very important ingredient and requires some practice to conjure up feelings of gratitude as if you have already received what you asked for.

All three ingredients are necessary for the cake to turn out properly.

Expectancy in everyday life

I often go jogging with my children and when we do we bring our 10 month old dog Bella with us. I was recently out on a run with my girls and Bella along the old Douglas to Peel railway line and it was Father's day. The girls wanted to run further so I headed back and waited for them at the entrance to the run.

I noticed that as they approached there was no sign of Bella. When I asked them where she was they said she was just behind them and had stopped to play with another dog. I told them to go back and look for her. When they returned with Bella I explained to them how they had made the same mistake many people do in relation to expectancy and the part it played in the Law of Attraction.

My girls had learned to expect that the dog would always eventually follow them. What they had failed to realise is that they were imposing expectancy on a completely different dog and one who had not yet learned to support their reality. The dog before Bella also didn't always follow in the beginning and it took time for him to learn to live up to their expectations of him.

I explained that Bella would also have to be taught to follow and until she did they had to be vigilant and not allow their minds to drift when she was out with them. Until such time as Bella proved that her behaviour fit what they expected they had to keep consciously focussed on the task.

The Effort Required to Create Change

Our minds wander if we don't give it something to do. This in itself is not negative except that a wandering mind tends to be drawn to old ways of thinking which then in turn attract old feelings associated with these thoughts. It is the feelings we feel that ultimately attract the people and experiences that create the old reality.

So when we are in the process of creating a new reality it is imperative to keep your eye on the ball or in other words keep consciously focussed on dwelling on the new thoughts that you know will conjure up the feelings that will attract the people and circumstances to create the new reality.

There is mental and emotional effort involved and that is something many people are simply not willing to invest. It is one thing to plant an apple tree and it is something else to then pray for a harvest of oranges. We get what we seek though what we seek is often times subconsciously driven and therefore we end up getting the old reality over and over again.

The Importance of Gratitude

I have written a separate article dealing with gratitude and how it is impossible to be unhappy while feeling grateful. You Attract What You Think About Most.

Gratitude is another very important ingredient if you wish to use the Law of Attraction to create your heart's desire. Gratitude is a feeling that comes after you receive something that you have been seeking. To deliberately conjure up feelings of gratitude before you have even received what you pray for creates the environment for receiving what you seek.

You can create the feelings that draw to you what you want regardless of whether you have received it or not. Imagining you already have received what you asked for is the key and the mind doesn't care whether it is in your hand or in your heart the feelings for both will be the same and if it isn't in your hand those feelings will ensure that is.

Fantasy to Reality

It is not enough to simply visualise what you want, you must add the all important ingredients of expectancy and gratitude to the mix for the Law of Attraction to work for you.

Visualising what you want is the act of looking at your desire. By visualising your desire you are creating the fantasy but the fantasy will remain in your mind and never be manifest in your reality if you do not actively seek what you want.

To seek what you desire you must explode outwards from you the image you have created within. To do this you must apply expectancy and gratitude.

Prayer to St Anthony and Original Prayer

Whenever, I can't find something I say a prayer to St Anthony and I have always found it. The reason I always find it is because I apply all all three ingredients of seeing what it is I am looking for, expecting to find it and feeling gratitude for finding it.

This was how prayer was originally taught but somewhere along the line people have forgotten to actively seek what they desire and do not explode outwards from their internal fantasy what it is they seek and so it remains as an unanswered prayer in the hearts of many today.

Missing Piece of the Puzzle

This article is not for everyone but for those of you who have tried using the Law of Attraction and have failed perhaps it may be the missing piece of the puzzle and you now use the fabric of the illusion we live in to create whatever your heart desires.

Life is a game but unless you know the rules it is going to be anything but fun!


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    • profile image

      Judeth 5 years ago

      I'm having a very big issues that need to be solved asap like in a week. I'm giving up so slowly on life and keep in faith of the LOA but nothing came from it. What should I do? I felt like I did everything you mentioned in the article.

    • Spirit Whisperer profile image

      Xavier Nathan 6 years ago from Isle of Man

      Mr Happy, we are both not just on the same page but it is as if we are using the same eyes to read that page. I don't know why but having you back has lifted my spirit. I thought about you while you were gone and I looked forward to resuming our exchanges.

      Lots of people are too focussed on the material things of the world and only use the Law of Attraction to acquire money and things. I consider using the law like this useful but it is not in things that we find peace and happiness. There are far loftier wishes to be had. (my opinion)

    • Mr. Happy profile image

      Mr. Happy 6 years ago from Toronto, Canada

      This is a great piece of writing Mr. Spirit Whisperer! I think you are completely right in saying that after visualizing a goal or a wish (I like wishes because they come true for me) one should have a "feeling of expectancy" regarding the result(s) wanted. I do wish I am getting this right (right in the sense of being on the same page with you now - lol).

      "Feelings" are just as important as the visualizing part. To visualize without feeling what one visualizes is stopping short. One can wish for example to own a Porsche but if one cannot literally feel themselves comfortable with getting in their Porsche, driving around, etc. then, that Porsche will never happen. I think one has to ... this is a little hard to explain ... one has to not only visually see their wish but feel it, believe in it as it has already happened. In the example I gave, one should visualize the colour of their Porsche, where it is parked, the sounds it makes ... one should feel the vibrations of the engine, the wind blowing through their hair as they put the top down ... and so on. Visualizing and feeling the future makes it happen.

      Writing things-up can help at this. And obviously honesty with oneself and with the wish made. In pursuing the Law of Attraction being "innocent as a child" helps.

      Of course, these are just my opinions. I am thankful for you writing this.

      P.S. As a kid when I owned my first dog or puppy better say, I used to hide from her but always kept her within sight. Sometimes I would let a short whistle to get her attention. I did this in a big parking lot. Either way, I would see her all of a sudden start looking around and then start searching for me through the rows of cars when she would realize that I was not close to her. This became a game ... for her to find me so, after a while I never had to look for her because she never let me out of sight (or smell - that works better with them). I had fun with that.

    • RealHousewife profile image

      Kelly Umphenour 6 years ago from St. Louis, MO

      Ha! No I didn't recognize him with the glasses:) that is cool! I love the photo!

    • Spirit Whisperer profile image

      Xavier Nathan 6 years ago from Isle of Man

      RealHousewife, thank you for visiting and your comment and support are always greatly appreciated. Do you like the Picture? I used gimp2 like photoshop and the guy in the picture is my son Jake.

    • RealHousewife profile image

      Kelly Umphenour 6 years ago from St. Louis, MO

      SW - love this. I do believe that there is a lot of power just in positive thinking. I liked how you used the Bella example. I could see myself jogging along taking for granted that the dog was following me - and turning around to see that it was gone! Lol. Kind of like my kids in the grocery store:)

      Up and awesome!

    • Spirit Whisperer profile image

      Xavier Nathan 6 years ago from Isle of Man

      Thank you always exploring for visiting and I can see from your comment that you are already actively using the secret and your success is your motivation to persevere. I appreciate your kind words and I am very glad to have found you too.

    • always exploring profile image

      Ruby Jean Fuller 6 years ago from Southern Illinois

      I'm learning that each day i remain positive in my thoughts and don't revert back to old habits, ie, thinking about past mistakes, blaming others for a failure, then i am able to look forward and expect a good outcome on something new i might want to try, in other words, i have faith that i can achieve a new goal. I want you to know that your words have helped me immensely, not only in this hub but others as well. Thank you.


    • Spirit Whisperer profile image

      Xavier Nathan 6 years ago from Isle of Man

      Oh barbergirl you are in for a real treat!

    • barbergirl28 profile image

      Stacy Harris 6 years ago from Hemet, Ca

      I haven't actually heard of The Power - or at least that I remembered. I will definitely have to check it out and put it on my to read list!

    • Spirit Whisperer profile image

      Xavier Nathan 6 years ago from Isle of Man

      Tina you are very good to read and comment. It sounds like there are big changes occurring in your life and I am glad if what I write is of any assistance in these challenging times for you. Keep your chin up girl and trust yourself.

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      Xavier Nathan 6 years ago from Isle of Man

      yes, Ava you are absolutely right. My father sent me a copy of the book "As A Man Thinketh" when I was in my teens but it wasn't until my 30's that I could truly appreciate it. With each reading I get so much more from it. Thank you for for reading this hub and your thoughtful comment is much appreciated.

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      Christina M. Castro 6 years ago from Baltimore,MD USA

      S.W.,Thank you for this excellent hub. I will be certain to look for this movie by Rhonda Byrne. I believe that viewing this movie in entirety and reading the book will give me a completely full understanding of the subject. I am in the process again in evaluating certain relationships in my life right now. As always, I appreciate your efforts that you put toward enhancing this inquisitive mind of mine.

    • Ava Marx profile image

      Ava Marx 6 years ago

      Excellent hub. The Law of Attraction is so often misunderstood. FWIW: As A Man Thinketh is one of my all time favorites. Great job!

    • Spirit Whisperer profile image

      Xavier Nathan 6 years ago from Isle of Man

      Barbergirl, thank you for taking the time to read this hub and your thoughtful comment is much appreciated.Yes, it is difficult to change but the effort you make is greatly rewarded as you already recognise. Have you read The Power by the same author. If you haven't you should try the audio book because the music really does add to the experience and helps you conjure up the feelings you desire.

    • Spirit Whisperer profile image

      Xavier Nathan 6 years ago from Isle of Man

      Thank you SuperheroSales and rorshak sobchak for visiting and commenting.

    • barbergirl28 profile image

      Stacy Harris 6 years ago from Hemet, Ca

      I heard about the secret before, but I don't remember where. Instantly, I had to seek out the DVD for it and waiting inpatiently for it to arrive in mail from Netflix. I think the hardest part about the whole process isn't to go back to the original ways of thinking. At the time that I watched the video... I had a lot of bad things happening. It seems when you are constantly fighting off the bad more bad always comes and you can do nothing but think of the bad. Your mind always wanders back to it. In my attempt to think positively, I found how hard of work it really was to keep that way. It takes focus and discipline and in my case a little sweat and tears as well. I am still working on it so I can't say it is succesful, but success will follow with more success! And it is definitely a good reason to try and stay positive!

      Great Hub! great topic!

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      rorshak sobchak 6 years ago

      I really enjoyed your hub. Great job!