Life's Little Annoyances: Part Duh.

Types of people with annoying personal idiosyncrasies are all around. Unfortunately you will run into many types of them throughout your life. They can be your mother, sister, brother, cousin, friends, anyone really. Here are a few that I have annoyingly discovered throughout my life.

Long gone are the days of "can I borrow a cup of sugar?" or a neighbor only saying hi as they pick up their paper from the front lawn or yawningly grab the mail from their curb mailbox. These days, the average neighbor seems to want more. Actually, catching you at every bad moment to tell you a story about nothing. These days neighbors are wanting you to come in, have a seat and watch tv with them as if you don't already spend your days working ungodly amounts of hours. Barely getting time to even wash dishes, heck even brush your teeth. Let alone sit down and watch Dancing with the Stars with them. If not that, you get a stray knock on your door from a neighbor that lives alone. You come clear from the other end of your house to answer said knock only to find out it is your neighbor who only wants to find out what your Facebook name is so they can friend you. Really? Seriously? I stopped in the middle of my laundry day for this? Door slam....

But perhaps that's just it. Life has become so complexed that working is all we have allotted our time for. And then when we get home we are not in any type of mood to deal with such requests that seem so foolish. Who has time to work a 10-12 hour day and come home to entertain the neighbor? Or maybe it's just the fact that the neighbor has a couple of personal issues that they are trying to drag you into. Only making your life miserable and contemplating moving to other residences. I think most of the time it's the latter of the two. Today, neighbors need to learn what "personal space" means. A neighbor coming over to have you help them tie a knot in their tie is not appropriate "getting to know one another" behavior. It's flat out annoying.

First of all this does not have to be a stranger sitting two rows behind you. Chances are high that the loud movie talker is your movie buddy. And how 'bout the ones that have a heavy Barry White undertone when they whisper? They think that just by whispering that solves the issue of talking too loudly. Little do they realize that with their heavy voices, they can be heard just as far as a loud talker. And it's just as annoying. Then you end up embarrassed or annoyed because you know everyone can hear them and their muffled incoherent tones. So what do you do? You give them some finger to the mouth action and say "shhhhh...." They get it for a while but when the next scene worth talking about comes up they are right back at it again. In the end, in order to enjoy your film there's a decision to be made. When it's your pal, either have a face to face talk with them before the movie or shush them again during. If it's some random stranger 2 aisles down, I'm not sure what can be done. You can try the shushing strategy or if you're feeling pretty brave you can go up to them and tell them to shut their pie hole, while clutching a can of mace in your hand of course.

*Dear morons that don't know the mace line was a joke, please do not try this. That's why our world is in such shambles now. Too much acting before thinking.

What is a question changer you might ask? These are the ones where you ask them a question and they give you an answer that seems like the answer to another question. For example if you asked them, "how many times did you go downstairs?" and they answer with, "he left this morning." What? How was that even remotely close to the answer you were trying to get out of them. I don't know what they have managed to hear in their heads but it's not what you've asked. It's quite annoying. It's also not what you want to deal with in a race against time. Say you rob a bank and ask the getaway driver where the getaway car is. The last thing you want to hear is, "It's got a powerful engine." No one cares about the powerful engine. You just want to know where that engine's location is so you won't get busted by the coppers. It's also difficult dealing with a question changer because it means your question still hasn't been answered and you have to repeat yourself and hope and pray you get the reply you're looking for.

I'm sure you all have run across this rather annoying annoyance. This bothersome irk comes while most likely telling a story. In your excitement you carry on with the details of it and the minute you hit a break in your story to deliver the finish of it, the person you are talking to ends your sentence for you but it's all wrong. It throws you off, you pause to hear what they just said, blink and politely say no and finish with what you were going to say. It's no big deal at first because you know that the story you're telling is exciting and maybe, just maybe, they want to join in and giddily help you tell it. But as you continue your tale they keep doing it and you have to say no again and finish it correctly, again. Before too long you're so exhausted with trying to keep track of your own story it's too much to bare and even continue in this Abbott and Castello-like fashion. I always just wonder if they even realize, not only that they're doing it but that they're always wrong 100% of their endings. Is it that they want to feel like they are on the same page with you? Fine, we can always be on the same page but let's end the story the same as well. Shall we?

So you're carrying on a convo with one of your friends and it's got all the makings of one of the best conversations you've had in your life. Someone else happens to be in the room listening in. No big deal. You're kind of enjoying the audience. They're happily listening to the two of you banter on. But then, they cause a hiccup in the flow by wanting to join in on the conversation with one of their "this happened to me stories." The two of you, blindsided by this, turn to the now conversing third party with excited head nods and smiling faces eagerly awaiting the punchline. Ears bent to hear every word of their thrilling interjection. But as they continue to speak, you notice how this story that they have brought to the table, doesn't seem to fit the topic that was being excitedly discussed before. And not only that, this new addition to the conversation is said with less enthusiasm, less momentum. In fact it's downright droll and the point of it still hasn't shown up. Bringing the whole conversation that started out with such energy to a screeching halt. And now you find yourself listening on and on waiting to hear the point of the story or see how it relates.

Lesson? When you see that person coming, go the other way. If they come in on you in the middle of a conversation again, just greet them with such enthusiasm as to completely sidetrack from the conversation. You have to do this right so they forget you were even in the middle of exchanging dialogue. They will be so happy that you've greeted them in such a manner they will forget to ask what you were even talking about. This totally keeps them from adding to anymore of your future conversations with their long boring, pointless, non-related life stories.

Life's annoyances often comes in the form of the human persuasion. There are so many funny yet annoying qualities from certain people you have to laugh at it or go crazy trying to deal with them. Some personalities you come across make you physically want to do them harm but those are the moments when you should stop, take a breath and realize you also have your own "issues". One shouldn't throw stones, or call the kettle black, or however that saying goes without having three fingers pointed back at them. Basically, we all have our moments of getting on someone else's nerves so make sure you check your ego at the door, take a look at yourself too and laugh at yourself as well.