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Anti Valentine's Day - Valentine's Isn't Just for Couples

Updated on September 21, 2012

Valentine's Day is an Opportunity to Let Family and Friends Know How Much they Mean to You

Every Valentine's Day my sister and I would wake up to candy in a heart shaped box, a cuddly bear, and other special goodies. My dad treated Valentine's Day in our household just as he did Christmas and Easter. On Christmas Santa Claus would leave us goodies overnight, on Easter the bunny would leave special treats, and on Valentine's Day we knew the thoughtful gifts of love came from Dad. Even now that I'm in my 30's and have children of my own, my dad still mails me a Valentine's Day card and a box of candy.

Valentine's Day doesn't have to be just for couples. It doesn't have to be limited to celebrating romantic love. There are many different types of love all equally important. Use Valentine's Day as a time to let everyone who is special in your life know just how much they mean to you. Let Valentine's Day be your excuse to perform random acts of kindness. This Valentine's Day don't sit back and wait for your love interest to give you a box of chocolates. Instead of thinking about what someone can do for you, use this as a day to pay it forward and do something loving for someone else. In the long run, being kind will make you feel far better than that box of chocolates ever could.

Image: luigi diamanti /

My Husband and I in 2000
My Husband and I in 2000

Anti Valentine's Day Minus the Bitterness

I've heard so many people, my husband included, say they hate Valentine's Day because it was created by greeting card companies to make money. My husband isn't big on Valentine's Day because he thinks it's silly to have such high romantic expectations on just one day a year, because he feels that spouses should love and respect each other every day.

My dad taught me the true meaning of Valentine's Day. Whether Valentine's was created by greeting card companies or not is irrelevant. I believe just like Mother's Day reminds us to honor our mothers and Father's Day reminds us to honor our fathers, Valentine's Day reminds us to do as the Bible instructs and "love our neighbors."

The truth is, romantic love is over rated. Romantic love is selfish. It's all about how great and giddy we feel while the love is still new. So many marriages break up simply when the newness or romantic feelings wear off. That's not true love. True love is patient, kind, and completely non-selfish. True love thinks about what the other wants, needs, and feels instead of how that other person makes us feel and how well they're satisfying our wants and needs.

I don't think being anti Valentine's Day has to be a negative thing. I think it's a great opportunity to show how much we appreciate our family and friends. It's a great time to let that elderly neighbor know we're thinking of them or show compassion to someone who's lost their spouse.

Anti Valentine's Day Ideas

Instead of rebelling against the entire day and being bitter or wallowing in self-pity, use Valentine's Day as an excuse to thank family and friends for their love, care, support, and friendship. No man is an island. We are social creatures and connections with other people are extremely important. Below you'll find all sorts of anti Valentine's Day ideas that have nothing to do with romantic love.

My Oldest Daughter
My Oldest Daughter

Celebrate Valentine's Day with Your Kids

Do something special for your kids this Valentines.

My dad always set out Valentine's goodies for us to find on Valentines morning. It was just as exciting for us as Christmas morning after Santa Claus's visit and Easter morning after the Easter Bunny's visit. In some ways Valentine's Day was even more special because we knew that the treats and gifts came from my dad.

He would give us candy, a stuffed animal, and something practical like a nightgown or clothes. It always made me feel special and reminded me of my dad's love for me.

As a grown woman, who now celebrates Valentine's Day with my husband, I still look forward to my dad's Valentine's gifts and cards that he sends me each year.

Use this Valentines to remind your children how special they are to you. You don't have to limit it to treats and goodies, you can also celebrate Valentine's Day by giving your children some quality time. If you're going out to dinner that evening with your husband, perhaps you can enjoy a fun lunch earlier that day with your kids. You'll be creating memories with them that will last a life time.

Valentine's Gifts for Kids - Give your children a gift this Valentine's Day

Little People Sweet Valentine Set
Little People Sweet Valentine Set

The perfect Valentine's Day gift for your little girl.

Mr. Potato Head Valentines Day Sweetheart Spud
Mr. Potato Head Valentines Day Sweetheart Spud

A fun and playful Valentine's Day gift for your little boy or girl.


Give the Gift of Love this Valentine's Instead of Receiving it.

Give the Gift of Love this Valentine's Instead of Receiving it.
Give the Gift of Love this Valentine's Instead of Receiving it.

Celebrate Valentine's Day with Your Parents

Do something special for your parents this Valentines.

Don't wait for Mother's Day and Father's Day to let your parents know how much you love and appreciate them. Use Valentine's Day as an opportunity to make them feel special.

If you don't live near your parents, then you can mail them a card. Perhaps you could send your mom flowers (think about may have been years since your mom has received flowers). You could also mail your mom and dad each their favorite candy or treat.

If you live near your parents, take them out to lunch or dinner. You could even go to their house and cook them dinner. If you'd like to do something practical for them to show you care, clean out their car and fill the tank with gas. If their is a chore that is difficult for them, take care of it for them. You could got over to their house and take out their trash and mop and vacuum, for example. Any of these tokens of thoughtfulness will be greatly appreciated.

Share the Spirit of Valentines with Friends, Loved Ones, and Neighbors

Share the Spirit of Valentines with Friends, Loved Ones, and Neighbors
Share the Spirit of Valentines with Friends, Loved Ones, and Neighbors

Celebrate Valentine's Day with Your Friends

Do something special for your friends this Valentines.

Friendships are important. As a poster that was give to me by a friend states, "Friends are the spice of life." Show your friends that you value their support and fellowship.

This Valentine's Day, you could send each of your close friends a Happy Valentine's Day card or even a free e-card. You could give each of your friends a decorative box of fresh baked goodies. Perhaps you have a few close friends that don't even know one another; invite your five best friends out for lunch.

If you have friends that are single this Valentine's Day, it is that much more important that you do a little something for them. Valentines can be a very painful Holiday when you're single. Be sure to call up your single friends and wish them a Happy Valentine's or send them a card and let them know that someone is thinking of them and appreciates their companionship.

Be the Loving Light in Someone Else's Darkness

Be the Loving Light in Someone Else's Darkness
Be the Loving Light in Someone Else's Darkness

Celebrate Valentine's with Someone Who Makes a Difference in Your Life

Do something special for the people who serve you and your family this Valentines.

All to often we forget the people who serve us and our family. Use Valentine's Day as an opportunity to show your appreciation.

Who might you include in this list? How about doing a little something for: your child's teacher, your preacher's wife, or even your mail carrier. Typically people who are in positions of service do not get compensated well and usually deal with a lot of complaints. Use Valentine's Day as an opportunity to show your appreciation for their years of service.

Have You Celebrated a Non-Romantic Valentine's Day Before? - Have you done something for someone other than a partner on Valentines?

Have you done something special for someone for a past Valentine's Day that you weren't in a romantic relationship with?

See results
Teacher photo on Flickr
Teacher photo on Flickr

One Final Anti-Valentine's Day Idea

Don't forget your child's teacher

My daughter came home from school one day with a flower order form in her backpack. It was to order the traditional single carnation for your child to be delivered to them at school on Valentine's Day. However, there was something new on the order form this year. It was divided in half. One half allowed you to order a flower for your child and the other allowed you to order for your child's teacher. What a nice thought! As a former teacher myself, I of course filled out the form right away. I'm not sure how many parents will be ordering flowers for their child's teacher, but I'm sure that even if just one or two parents think to honor their child's teacher on Valentine's Day that it would make a huge impact. It feels good to know you're appreciated.

Other Ways to Celebrate Valentine's Day

Do something special for someone else this Valentines.

There are many people that you could really help just by showing that you're thinking of them. In today's busy "me" society, so many people slip through the cracks. Giving them just a morsel of your time or a small token of thoughtfulness can mean so much to them.

Here are some ideas:

  • Visit a nursing home and ask the workers which residents have no family. Read to these residents or just give them cards. Giving them even a small bit of attention will mean so much.
  • Do something special for an elderly neighbor. Cook them dinner. Offer to run errands for them for the day. Seeing how your giving spirit touches their life will make you feel great.
  • Visit cancer patients in your local hospital and lift their spirits. You can buy a box of the little inexpensive Valentines that children pass out at school and take them to your local hospital and hand them out to brighten the day of patients.

Have a Giving Spirit this Valentine's Day

Very little things in life will make you feel as great as serving others.

As Albert Einstein once said, "Only a life lived for others is a life worth living."

This Valentines celebrate a love other than romantic love. Use it as an opportunity to think outside your self and love your fellow man.

Gift Baskets for Her - Give a gift to a neighbor, friend, or loved one.

Gift Baskets for Him - Give a gift to a neighbor, friend, or loved one.

Instead of being anti Valentine's Day, why not use it as a time to show friends and family how much they mean to you?

How Do You Celebrate Valentine's Day? - Are you anti-Valentine's Day?

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    • Lee Hansen profile image

      Lee Hansen 

      6 years ago from Vermont

      I have wonderful memories of childhood Valentine's Day gifts from my Dad just as you do. I loved doing special things for my husband and daughters on Valentine's Day. When I was divorced and single again, Valentine's Day to me was still a cute card sending day mainly for school kids. I like to do special things for family and friends all year long; Feb 14 reminds me to think about others and have some crafty fun with my grandchildren. Oh, I better get on that this week!

    • profile image


      6 years ago

      I love this lens! Nice take on the holiday. I often think that Valentine's Day is overrated. But you're right in saying that it is romantic love that is overrated. And it's sad that a lot of us associate the holiday with that kind of love. You have great ideas to make Valentine's Day more meaningful. When I was younger, my mom would always buy us heart-shaped donuts and it always made my day. :)

    • flycatcherrr profile image


      6 years ago

      I absolutely love the idea of spreading the Valentine's Day joy around, wider than the couples' circle. In the words of the old song, it's "what the world needs now..."

    • christinsword profile image


      6 years ago

      What a wonderful and sober perspective on Valentines Day. Nice lens.

    • Lady Lorelei profile image

      Lorelei Cohen 

      6 years ago from Canada

      Valentine's day is indeed a day of love I completely agree with your dad's view of this wonderful day. I tell my grandchildren that it is LOVE DAY and the day when you tell everyone how much you love them.

    • profile image


      6 years ago

      Fun lens! Featured with my Anti-Valentine's Day / Single Awareness Lens!

    • profile image


      7 years ago

      The idea is cool. I will give it a try to send gifts to people around me on next Valentine's Day!

    • ajgodinho profile image

      Anthony Godinho 

      7 years ago from Ontario, Canada

      I always like outside-the-box thinking and this lens does exactly that! I say celebrate love on some random day altogether rather than waiting for the specific day it's celebrated. Excellent ideas presented here as well as beautiful presentation! :)

    • pkmcruk profile image


      7 years ago from Cheshire UK

      As always incredibly informative and beautifully presented information and a nice take on the Valentine's niche

    • profile image


      9 years ago

      What a heartfelt lens!! I'm a mother of 6 and I have always made holidays special just like your father did, and does. Now.after reading the beautiful memories of your childhood, I realize how my kids will feel later on, when they too have a family. I hope that they keep the tradition with their families. I also like your suggestions of showing love and care to others outside of your immediate family. Great lens! I really enjoyed it! Gazella :)

    • mbgphoto profile image

      Mary Beth Granger 

      9 years ago from O'Fallon, Missouri, USA

      Great lens. You make excellent suggestions. Lensrolling it to my Valentine lens..

    • luvmyludwig lm profile image

      luvmyludwig lm 

      9 years ago

      Great lens! I am lensrolling it to"love is in the air"

    • profile image


      9 years ago

      What a fanstastic idea for a lens! Loved it, such great ideas. - Kathy

    • religions7 profile image


      9 years ago

      Great - found a new giant :) congratulations. This is a wonderful lens.

    • Mihaela Vrban profile image

      Mihaela Vrban 

      9 years ago from Croatia

      I agree with your lens title! You make many great suggestions here! Lensrolled it to Being born on Valentine's day!


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