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Am I Sensitive?
I have intended to write this hub several times before, but the time just did not seem to be appropriate. As life passes us by, and we encounter many people and circumstances in our life, we are forever gaining knowledge. Some knowledge just sits around and waits for us to recognise it, other knowledge, like a butterfly flutters on the breeze of our imagination until we open our minds to accept it. And at other times, we close our mind to outside influences that are just opportunity's that are lost to us.
The New Choice English Dictionary gives us two explanations for the word 'Sensitive,' the first talks about sensitive as a reaction to something tangible, such as an allergic reaction to face cream, or sticking plasters, possibly soup powder and in some cases, medicines. Whilst the second explanation says "having the power of sensation", the capacity to feel, and be over-sensitive to the awareness of feeling. Both of these explanations are correct.
But let us look at the latter explanation of sensitive in more depth. I am a Sensitive , but I am not sensitive to tangible things such as I stated above. I am sensitive to atmospheres, emotions, cruelty, stress, and pain. One part of being a sensitive is the ability to empathise with any other living material in your life, be it people, dogs, cats, horses, zoo animals, or even in extreme cases vegetables! I am an empathy driven human being.
Now don't jump up and down and think psychic I am no more psychic than most people that I know, and to be honest, the speaking to the dead adventures is not for me. I do have the ability to smell familiars, for instance a perfume or certain body smell of someone who has passed over. I also can open my soul to feel their touch, a loving hug or a caress of the face, but I am afraid of the visions that if I totally opened up my soul to, I would see too many things to cause me distress.
Being a Sensitive can be misconstrued as a gift, but more often than not it is a curse. You can't switch it on and off like a light bulb, because your senses are always too frequent. It isn't hog wash or an illness or even a disability and it is normal to approximately 5% of the earth's population. Many people believe that if you were a sensitive child, you will become a sensitive adult, that is certainly true in many cases. Or you may simply be stood in a bus queue and suddenly feel empathy for the unknown person standing next to you.
I am constantly being told by people who do not know me well enough to stop "being sensitive", believe me I wish I could. But that form of sensitivity has nothing to do with being a Sensitive
About twelve years ago I met a famous psychic medium, before anyone had ever heard about him. The great scouser (from Liverpool), Derek O'Coragh. He was on tour with a fellow psychic medium from Scotland whose name escapes me. I met him in the bar of a hotel in Ballyshannon, County Donegal, whilst out for a night with a girlfriend. I had never met him before then and only looked in his direction because of his scouse accent, I was born in Southport twenty one miles away from Liverpool, and his accent was music to my ears.
Derek approached me standing at the bar and said, as I thought to everyone in general "I always meet one," as he repeated it again turning to face me, I felt a little intimidated, "One what?" I asked him. "A sensitive with a gift to become a psychic" he replied drawing heavily on his cigarette and blowing puffs of smoke into the air above us both. I wont bore you here with the dialogue that past between us, or the fact that I thought he was a madman until he told me what I could see through my bedroom window as a small child. Well he got me there.
However, I was not about to enquire further about physic abilities, no way. But what he did tell me about being a sensitive made perfect sense, because I had felt like that since a very small child.
I have always been able to devote my care and attention to the grief stricken people around me. Stricken by the feeling of being in pain, not just physically but mentally too. I try to stop myself from going there because it isn't comfortable. I feel like I have had a skin full of beer and am about to be sick. But Derek advised me to look on my sensitivity as a friend rather than a gift. I should offer my friendship to the needy and the people that I love unconditionally to benefit their quality of life, accept my feelings gladly and be proud of my inner qualities. I do this everyday, but all to often I am misconstrued as being pushy or interfering and then it is I who become sensitive to rejection and cross words.
I will never close my mind to being a sensitive, but sometimes I can experience an emotional overload. This results in me becoming so tired that I just want to sit and be alone for a few days, no not antisocial, just at peace.
Many of my Hub Page buddies comment about my ability to discuss controversial topics sympathetically. That is not easy by any means, but it is just who I am and not what I want to be.
So I thank everybody who has left a comment regarding any controversial topic I may have covered, this hub is for you. I am not a great writer just a good listener with a very open soul, and you my Hub Buddies are my inspiration.