ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel
  • »
  • Books, Literature, and Writing

Bargain Pie-Stage Three in Grief Series

Updated on January 29, 2013
I'll Take it!
I'll Take it! | Source

I'll trade you this for that!

Apple crisp? Aloo? Banana cream, Blackberry, Pumpkin? Well, pies, that is.

Ummm...doesn't really matter which flavor you choose, in my line of thinking. Bargaining for something that can't come to fruition, is either an exercise in futility--or a very simple notion! I wonder which? I am guessing it's the former. Funny thing is, we all do it! Not only that, but we all want to do it! It brings comfort, peace, transient happiness. It brings pies that delight; then get ravaged in no time. And, that empty tin spitting back in your sad pie face--is not pleasing in the least.

We all get to pick our choice of pies though--and choice is critical to personal well-being; whatever unbearable hunkering is blanketed in pure ambrosia-- in the moment. One electric word for surviving this painful process--whether it's brought about by loss of a loved one; a job, or any other significant loss in your life is: coping. We'll reach for whatever will alleviate, or lessen, the pain in a whole mess of ways. (Just how some say it in the South! Then, you'll hear, "She's such a mess!" It almost sounds good. Doesn't it? It's not intended to be nice, however. You got that though, I know.) Ultimately, what's bad is just that--and we try our best as humans to make it better. And, eventually, we get there... Well, most of us do, I think. Sort of. Time plays with us like the grand puppeteer that it is, for just a while first. Kind of like a fat cat batting a three-legged, baby mouse about for as long as he pleases--as an appetizer to the inevitable. Need I say more?

Apparently, we all find methods of coping ( good, bad, or both!) in our response to loss. Even more than Baskin Robbin's offers! Here are a few that you can read about in-depth on changingminds.org. Well, these are principally the negative approaches we gravitate toward:

  • Adaptive : provides positive help.
  • Attack: pour misery onto others.
  • Avoidance: run from the issue.
  • Behavioral: effects what we do.
  • Cognitive: alters what we think.
  • Conversion: turns one thing into another.
  • Defense: Freud's theory.
  • Self-harm: do bad stuff to ourselves.

If you wish to learn about the more positive and productive coping measures to take--after you've exhausted (and gotten bored with) all of the destructive options; there are a number of them to choose from, according to this site. (Why do I find the negative choices so much more interesting? I'll answer that: Probably, because they require less effort on my part, and don't justify indulging in pie over and over, again.)

In the end, I say, find the flavor that works best for you--and stick with it! It won't let you down. But, before we go, please pass that lovely Rhubarb Cream pie with the lattice crust, over there. The one that tastes best suits me (at least for now). It's bittersweet. You know, just like life. Besides, I know how to make a mean version. Want some? Don't we all like pie?

Comments

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    No comments yet.

    working

    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: "https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr"

    Show Details
    Necessary
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Features
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Marketing
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Statistics
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)