ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Book Review of Conflict Free Living by Joyce Meyer

Updated on November 4, 2013

A book about finding peace in relationships

If you find your life full of conflict and unsatisfying relationships, Conflict Free Living by Joyce Meyer is for you. This book is all about relationships: how to have satisfying, peaceful and love-filled relationships that are mutually edifying.

Joyce usually writes from personal experience. She says on the first page of this book that conflict almost destroyed her life and her ministry. Through diligent Bible study, especially passages pertaining to peace, Joyce began to understand how she could find peace in her life and her relationships.

Joyce says learning to resist conflict and strife is the key to peace and happiness in relationships. She quotes numerous Bible verses pertaining to peace such as Psalm 37:37 which say “Mark the blameless man and behold the upright, for there is a happy end for the man of peace.”

Amazon has the best prices on Joyce Meyer's books

Conflict Free Living: How to Build Healthy Relationships for Life
Conflict Free Living: How to Build Healthy Relationships for Life
This is the book described in this review. Click here to purchase.

Author Joyce Meyer speaks from personal experience

One thing that attracts people to Joyce, her books, and her ministry is her willingness to be so open about her own failures and shortcomings. This makes others feel she is on their level instead of looking at her as a spiritual giant on a plane that they could never attain to. For example, in her books she frequently talks about how much she and her husband clashed in the early years of their marriage. Conflict Free Livingis no different.

In chapter nine of Conflict Free Living entitled “Disagree Agreeably and Magnify the Positive” Joyce talks about the conflict that arose with her husband Dave because of their differences. She goes on to say:

"One day in the midst of a verbal quarrel, Dave looked at me and said, ‘Joyce, I am doing the best I know how to do.’

"‘Well, so am I,’ I responded.

“We were finally just plain tired of picking on each other all the time and bickering. We actually shook hands. ‘Dave,’ I said, ‘I want you to know that I accept you today just the way you are. I believe that you are doing the best you can.’

‘Joyce, I accept you today the way you are,’ Dave replied. ‘I believe you are doing the best you can, too.’

“That was a new beginning for us! We finally started allowing each other freedom to be who we are.”

Freedom needed in relationships

“People need freedom in order to grow. But God can’t change a person if we stand in His way. God could not speak to Dave because I was too busy speaking to him. God could not change him because I was trying to change him. God needed my faith, not my help. Set the people in your life free, and trust God to make whatever changes are necessary.”

She also had to experience a similar epiphany with two of her four children which she discusses in the following chapter. She had intense conflict with her oldest son Dave for many years because he was so much like her. She says:

“After I forgave (son) Dave (for not meeting her expectations) and told him that I loved and accepted him, our relationship began to heal and change. Not long after that, God called him to go to Bible College. When he graduated from college, he married and spent one year on the mission field in Costa Rica. When he and his wife returned from the mission field, he took a job with us. He is now a key leader in our ministry.”

And finally: “The very things that I struggled with so much in his personality as a child have become the biggest blessing to us in his role in our ministry.”

Lack of peace begins internally

Joyce points out that strife often begins within a person, and relationship conflict is often an outgrowth of inner turmoil. To have peace, one must learn how to identify the symptoms of strife such as: pride (defensiveness), bitterness, hatred, judgment and criticism, deceptions and lies, anger, rebellion, unrest, and fear and negativity.

Pride often manifests itself in an unwillingness to admit we are wrong. Destructive words often follow, but soft answers and a gentle tongue promote peace. Humility is requisite for peaceful relationships. Strife in relationships also inhibits God’s blessing. We need to forgive offenses and look out for the interest of others while trusting God to look out for our interests.

Sometimes conflict stems from an individual’s feelings of insecurity and low self-worth which manifest themselves in self-hatred and self-rejection. Joyce says that if we don’t get along with ourselves, we won’t be able to get along with others. The other person (often unintentionally) either reminds us of what is missing in ourselves or what we don’t like about ourselves. How can we make peace with others if we can’t make peace with ourselves?

The book is written from a Biblical perspective and includes many Bible verses as references and encouragement to trust God to change us and help us with our struggles.

This is just a sample of the wonderful gems to be found in this book. It is probably one of those books that needs to be read more than once or referred to every so often to fully grasp the principles that are presented within.


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    No comments yet.


    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

    Show Details
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
    ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)