- Books, Literature, and Writing»
- Commercial & Creative Writing»
- Creative Writing»
- Humor Writing
You can't say that
In the current world in which we all live in, political correctness has became a way of life. There are certain terms which shouldn't be said, and there are certain things which just shouldn't be done.
You certainly don't want to yell out the word Bingo during a Bingo game when you don't have it on your card, and you don't run into a crowded firehouse and holler movie. It's also not very funny to pull a fortune out of a Chinese fortune cookie, which reads "Oops... wrong cookie".
There are certain politically correct terms, which I can't stand to hear. Phases like user friendly, down sizing, and the word issues. If there's a problem don't call it an issue. After all a problem is a problem. An issue is a copy of a magazine or a daily newspaper. Instead of reinventing words just simply say what you mean.
Where I'm employed it has become politically incorrect to smoke inside anymore. I guess the good thing is that we all can still smoke, but it's outside now. During the Springtime, and fall of the year it's not all that bad. But it's a totally different story in the hot Summer time, and the cold Wintertime of the year.
We have little smoking booths for those foul weather days at work, and we all have an agreement and a standing rule for when we must be inside of them. It's a simple rule, but I'm going to have to use the "F" word to explain it - "If you have to fart then take it outside".
Something happened just the other day at work, which at the time wasn't all that funny. However when we all look back at what happened, we can't stop laughing. Hopefully it will be just as funny when it's turned into a hub here.
With foul weather upon us now we all had to take refuge inside of one of the smoking huts. When inside the golden rule must be followed. One of our coworkers decided he better step outside, and so he did. He wasn't the least bit upset that he had to leave the smoking hut with us and simply just made himself at home outside in the crisp cool morning air. We all could see him, from inside the smoking hut, just standing there puffing on a cigarette looking up at the morning sky, and just enjoying life to it's fullest. When we all noticed that all of a sudden he picked up his right leg and shook it as if he was trying to shake something out of his pants leg. We weren't so sure what was going on at this point, and someone yelled "What are you doing?". He acknowledged that he was just freshening up the outdoor air.
Now this is where the really strange part came into play, and still nobody quite understands why. Possibly it was just human curiosity that just got the best of everyone that was inside the smoking hut. But one thing was for sure, and that is that all of those people who were in the warm heated smoking hut started to file out into the cold air, like a bunch of zombies, and surrounded him in a circle. They then all exchanged pleasantries back and forth out in the cold air. Of coarse the topic being discussed at this point was what our coworker had just accomplished. He was like a proud parent of a newborn baby, and didn't hesitate for one minute on giving out any of the details of his exploits to us. After everyone seemed satisfied with his version of what just happened, they all dispersed and went about their daily routine.
Now if someone was not familiar with all of this, and saw this for the very first time, they might think that they were watching an episode about how primates interact amongst one another in the wild on a National Geographic show on the History channel. The announcer would of probably narrated the television show something like this - "The primates fascination level finally reached the point where they had to leave their warm surroundings to investigate the interesting situation, which was just outside their perimeter. Their eager desire to learn from the outsider had got the best of their interest in primate affairs of others. The smaller primates then all of a sudden surrounded the bigger primate in a tight circle and chanted to him "Do it again, do it again". The bigger primate had no problem sharing his passion with his new found friends. The entire group of primates now satisfied with their new found talent returned back to their warm surroundings and licked themselves to sleep."
This could probably be an entire 30 minute show or even possibly an entire series on The History Channel just like Ice Road Truckers or the Alaskan Bush People. Besides the whole premise of that show is simply about a person driving from point A to point B in the snow. What's the big deal, we've all done it, and people watch it on television. Give a show like this an opportunity, and people might watch it as well.