Heartaches.

"Heartaches."

Heartaches

are like a toothache

in the middle of

your sternum,burning like sterno

freshly lit.

Joy reduced to ash,

ashes pulverized by

the continued beating

of the heart.

Between aches

comes a roaring in my ears

pounding like funeral drums

in my temples.

Great loss

recently excised 

that managed to 

stay around long enough, 

to grip my heartstrings

and pull them, 

like spastic elastic

far beyond their ability

to stretch as they break

The exact reverse 

of what it feels like

when you're first in love.

That rush of adrenaline,

the lump in your chest,

the I can't catch my breath,

ohhhh,there she is

pitta-patter

pitta-patter

pitta-patter

But heartache

is a caustic crush

a-drain-a-line

in reverse

through a meat grinder

of pain.

Memories churning,

grief returning,

Oh to just cut

this aching heart out,

and throw it as far

as the most distant star,

tumbling in scarlet

and yellow flame,

through the universe.

But then the soul 

will step through

that hole left by 

its expulsion

bringing with it

eternal sorrow.

Heartaches take time,

rest, and rejuvenate

focus on something  

more beautiful,

that is still around.

empty the mind

of all the burrs that 

stirred the heart into

agony....and just breathe.

Relief came  to me 

somewhat when

I held the hand 

of my small child.

He knows so 

little of heartache.

I looked for a 

second or two

into his eyes, 

where the depth 

of those pools

know mostly peace 

and joy for now.

and it swept me 

with a flood

of tears as he just said 

" I Love you!."

How sad that the magic

of love children know 

so young

can simply wear away 

as their eyes see the reality

of the world at large.

As their hearts are burdened

with words that wound

and adult games that hurt

and love that is not

uncompromising.

Heartaches begin then

and their  youthful 

elation fades.