ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

How to Know If They Are Right For You...

Updated on July 13, 2016

It seems with divorce rates at an all time high. The number of people married several times is also increasing. According to a recent study... those married three to four times, are up to 30% more likely to suffer heart disease and other stress related illness than those married once, and especially long term. Many young people start out on a life-long pattern of impulsive pairing that usually ends in disaster.


Choices, choices, choices

Quite often in this increasingly superficial, materialistic world; we rely on the wrong factors to determine our mates. Having been through more than a few failed relationships; in retrospect, there were signs of trouble early on. Most of us ignore those signs.

Certain things seem to outweigh their "bad-points" for us, and we march blindly ahead. Things like: Their physical attractiveness

their finances

our loneliness

rebounding from a break-up too soon

a desire for intimacy

an unhealthy self esteem

If we all followed better judgement (easier said than done), we might see the signs that would clue us to later troubles. Here are a few:

  • They don't have any interest in your dreams. Anyone not willing to listen to your dreams are probably not planning on the long term anyway.
  • They only talk about themselves. Those people that are their own greatest fans. They might as well marry themselves. Let them... please.
  • All the blame for failed relationships goes to their exes. If the ex was always at fault: which well be the case,and yet what does that say for their judgement? They always pick the worse people... now they are with you...hmmmm
  • They are withholding contact information. Obviously this person is otherwise engaged...Nuff Said!!!!
  • They are rude to other people. In stores , restaurants, or theatres they are rude to wait staff or salespeople . Closely watch this one, if they can treat any human being with so much disdain; guess who's next????
  • They never let you pick the movie. Could be a sign they are control freaks, or even a worse kinda freak. Although you may (you women especially) like some assertiveness in a mate. Too much, however, is just too much!
  • They ALWAYS let you pick the movie. Could be a sign they would rather be anywhere else in the universe. If they are that polite though(as may be the case); they should allow you the polite turn, and pick the darn movie already!
  • Does not communicate with their family. Although it is a sad fact that some people come from broken, and sometimes horrid families; be leery if that person doesn't express any valid reason to shun the family. They may, in fact, be the broken, horrid one.
  • Does not want to meet your family. Although some nervousness about meeting them initially is understandable; too much off-putting could mean you aren't so special in their eyes.
  • Not liked by, children, dogs, or parakeet. Not to group children and pets; however they do seem to share an inherent intuitiveness that is often uncanny.
  • Insecurities. Does this person need constant reassurance that they are smart, funny, attractive, and the like. Insecure people may feel the need to call you several times a day. This may be great if you both feel the need to communicate so much... it may be cute and romantic. Be forewarned that such a need could be a sign of jealousy,possessiveness, or worse!

Although no one is perfect, and to find perfection in a mate you'd probably have to leave the planet... it is reasonable, however, to have certain expectations. Remember too that just as one should not go to do the grocery shopping when hungry, when you are seeking a mate jumping into the dating pool too soon after a broken relationship can blur judgement.

It is also true that being too long away from a relationship can cause a similar calamity. Although loneliness is often the understandable motivation in seeking a mate it should't be sole reason to be with anyone. We should always remember, that we should be with someone worthy of our time ,and efforts.

Laurinzo Scott 2012


Have you looked for one or more of these signs, either now or in the past?

See results

This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

Show Details
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)