If love is a crime
“If love is a crime, then I am a culprit, an offender punishable by heartbreak.”
I have been hurt so many times and each time, there is always someone to help me stand back on my feet and move on and that same person will also eventually hurt me and leave me for another comforter who will end up mending and breaking my heart. What color is love?
I was scared because I don’t want to get pregnant and I was scared because my father will kill me if he ever find out that such a thing happened, he was a descent Muslim but that day, I made up my mind that I was going to go against my upbringing after all he promised that he will marry me.
Believe me, I walked into his bed room and saw him on bed with my younger sister. My heart broke and I cried for years. I hated both of them although I did not report her to our father because I know that doing so means a death sentence. How can I do that to her? Let Allah be the judge.
I detest guys and I vowed never to give any of them my heart but you see, charm is deceitful and gold is pure. This was how I classified him because he was one of the most famous students in campus and he was liked by many, whenever there was a problem in the campus, he would be at the fore front of settling matters, at a time some mistook him for a cult member because of his strong presence in everything.
He was not scared to stand in front of the VC and tell him the wrongs going on in the campus, he was the very person that helped in the investigation and subsequent arrest of two lectures that extolled money from students for pass mark. I mean, the guy trapped me, he trapped me and I gave him my all but he took my innocence and abandoned me for another babe before we left school.
I had two other relationship before I clocked thirty and both ended with me at the losing side, perhaps I was born to be tricked and jilted, so I decided to give guys capital letter NO and I vowed to rather sleep with a dog instead of a man; yes men are dogs in any case so he showed up on my 31st birthday, the one that broke my principal.
The one I called the bull dog. He broke the walls of my heart and like a blink of the eye, he had me and devoured me, then six months into our super bond, I realized that he was married in Spain where he reside so all those sweet talks, all the promises that I will live in Spain with him were all fallacy.After that heartbreak which almost cost me my life because my Dad knew this guy and accepted him because he was a Muslim.
He was a refugee from Liberia and I liked him from the moment I saw him, there was a strong chemical between us, he wasn’t looking for a woman but for shelter, he wasn’t looking for sympathy but comfort and I saw it in him. He was the son of a butchered army general, a onetime first class citizen now refugee in Senegal. We began talking and i made sure that he got everything he wanted.
I did everything to show him how much I wanted him in my life, I wanted to take an oath to show him that I was ready but you see, when it is time, it is time and whatever that will stay will come and will stay.Amidst all we passed through, he did not for one day walk out the door and it is been 20yrs now.
I forgave my sister because she helped me to find my perfect love and she understood because she is godmother to my two daughters.