~Life Commanded Me~

Occasionally life forces us to make decisions which are sometimes hard to bare, yet eventually life commands us to do whats right and fair.

I tried to reinvent this perfect world away from kaos and confusion, hidden beneath layers of fatal lies and disillusion.

Yet I found the more I ran away from life the more life reeled me in, every door I tried to jam, life shoved through and said here I am!

Every window I tried to slam, life shattered the very conscious within, leaving a broken dam of emotions flooding my inner soul, evoking distant memories, forcing my soul to unfold. To find a way through the catacomb of time life! had commanded me.

But the past wasn't done with me yet, unresolved issues and sullen regrets begin to cascade down the boulders of my heart, like a broken silhouette in the wind demanding I let them in.

Unwed pregnancy, infidelity, promiscuous sex, low self esteem had even joined the team, in a run down shack on a road of broken dreams,

yet to me I was the ghetto queen or so it seem, living ghetto fabulous on the ghetto scene, draped from head to toe with name brand clothes from discount stores, bound by streets of fantasy, trapped in a world of poverty.

I dine'd on everything I could get my hands on, at least everything the ghetto could offer me, even had my own cliché on occasions when my heart or ego needed an overhaul that day, "Two wrongs don't make us right but it dam sure make us even, and if you ain't doing it my way, brotha your leaven".

Yes! so I thought I was living large and in charge, but my life was totally flawed and I was the only one who couldn't see humanities bars.

So I reinvented this perfect world away from kaos and confusion, still life in its infamous way came knocking. I stood there in silence as I opened the door, to face the rage that had kept me caged.

Lunged at the pain that once stole my peace, released tears that had became a permanent acquaintance before life would set me free, I had to face my own deep scars in the depth of my own memories, life! had commanded me.

(©)copyright;KarenRussell