Memory Lane - Poem of Hatred

Years gone by, all this time learning to fly.
But now, I don't need wings, only a firearm fixes some things.
Regrets, mistakes and all their friends.
Will shortly come to their 5,45mm ends.

Rejection lies in the toilet, throat slit.
Nostalgia and memories dispatched - no remorse, even for a bit.
I care not for police sirens nearby.
To my "friends" a gunshot says my final goodbye.

Every bench I sat at, everyone I knew.
White Phosphorus rounds, compensate with pain for the attempts you blew.
I have execute authority, to sweep and clear my past.
Always being so afraid that good times never last.

I will hunt your happiness is down.
All your addresses known.
I will wait for you outside after the first petrol bomb is thrown.
Police sirens and warnings now, I hear them clear as day.
My guts full of C4, salvation from all your decay.

Dear Lord, save some kindness for me.
Let me know, how can I redeem myself for thee.
The world pushed and pushed, till no good memories remained.
Tainted, betrayed and all life drained.
Forgive me, if you can, for I shall live and die an angry, disturbed man.

Sleepless nights, their faces all smiles.
First kill self-defense against those who pursued me for miles.
If only it was so easy, to just carpet-bomb it all.
Whatever and whoever I knew, they all must fall.

Sweep every room, of every place I been.
Left none standing, memory lane makes a threshing machine.
Visions of blood and gore, all that is remains.
Despise your happiness, now you're a red mist of brains.

My high school crush, my happy times before.
Should be removed, load incendiary rounds some more.

No one smiles here, all happy thoughts are burned.
A black, damp hole full of depleted uranium, is what my heart has turned.
Memory lane, look what you did!
Paranoia and sadness, more evil my mind has hid.

No real dreams, just reactions to everything around.
All I want now is to become a pile sentient guns; sky to ground.