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Run! It's Hairy Arm Guy!
Beware! Beware! Yon lassies and other such members of the feminine gender! Yes, I'm talking to you, all of you delectable young ladies out clubbin’ with friends, smiling and dancing and tossing your hair! Take heed, and escape while you still have a chance, for here comes Hairy Arm Guy!
You know the type, sure you do. Everything is a ‘Snap!’ to this guy; it’s his favorite gesture — hairy forearm extended, fingers loudly popping. Perhaps that's because it lets him show off his artificially-indoor-tanned wrist encircled by his gaudily oversized fake-platinum and ebon clunker of a timepiece, with its 43 functions and extreme Euro-techno death-defying/spelunking/Everest-scaling/scuba-diving/base-jumping/race-car-driving/fighter-piloting styling. (Man, do guys like this struggle to over-compensate, or what?)
And it’s not just his arm that is hairy. It’s unfortunately also his neck, back, knuckles, nostrils, earlobes and perhaps other areas you’d rather not contemplate. Eeeeeewww! T.M.I.!
Run, girls, run!
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