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Who I Once Before Today

Updated on August 2, 2017

Assalammu alaykum, Wr. Wb

Dear Uriel.

Right after reading your Let Us Cry NOT ALONE

I started typing the words which flooded inside my restless thought

But then I found myself fall asleep in front of my Laptop

Realized time almost midnight

Because my Baby Kitten already nested in one of her favorite spot to sleep at night

Inside the arch on the back of my neck

I tried to continue

But my Kitty decided to interfered

She jumped and lied on top of the keyboard

With her big innocent eyes asked for full attention

I had no choice but to give up

And gave her the bed she wanted every night


Just like always ( :D )

The next day I tried to continue

But oh, how weird

It become too long than I ever intended

But hey, I think it’s all right

Beside it is not me who have to read it ( :D )

This is your homework, Sister!

Don’t stop before you done! I warned you! :D :D :D

I am 33 years old, far older than you

A woman who hardheadedly choosing to be single

Inside I just growth

From baby, suddenly turned into 100 years old

My life was too easy, they said

East princess with all privilege

I was long paralyzed under trance

Hypnotized by the love of those who hold me as their favorite’s one

But damn, what others had seen not always the truth!

I failed to understood what love really is

I got mislead when had to built

Real human inside that beautiful spoiled lady

So when the world falling apart

The princess frozen by fear

Finally she realized

That she never had any wings

How to save herself?

How to save all she had?

How she will able to live

If she couldn’t able to wear that irresistible crown anymore?

At that moment

There is nobody wanted to cry with her

Since all of them chose to Mourned

Over the failed of their sweet little Princess

Knowing this then

She was death...

No storm will able to wake her ever again

For sure...

for sure.


Hmmm... I want to tormenting you by pushing you to read further but somehow, I feel terrible, mostly because you said you didn't have much time even only for scracth. Hehehe... (Hey, the offer still open widely! Which hand you need? Left or right? ;P )

To be honest, it is because my Baby Kitten already staring at me with full of hope. How I can refuse that sweet meow? Hhhh... Bed time now and I need to surrender to her need. Hehehe. Beside, it is more fun if you have to visit me again tomorrow so... see you tomorrow, beautiful one! :D



Submit a Comment
  • Freya Cesare profile imageAUTHOR

    Freya Cesare 

    9 years ago from Borneo Island, Indonesia

    Thank you, Rehana. It is really kind of you. ^^

  • Rehana Stormme profile image

    Rehana Stormme 

    9 years ago

    Aww, that was really sweet.......

  • Freya Cesare profile imageAUTHOR

    Freya Cesare 

    10 years ago from Borneo Island, Indonesia

    MIcky Dee: Just like I like yours. Hehehe. Thank you, Sir.

  • Micky Dee profile image

    Micky Dee 

    10 years ago

    Very beautiful Freya! I love all your writing. God bless this Freya!

  • Freya Cesare profile imageAUTHOR

    Freya Cesare 

    10 years ago from Borneo Island, Indonesia

    Hey accaetnna! Hehehe. If come from you, that kind of comment mean so much to me. ^^ thanks.

  • acaetnna profile image


    10 years ago from Guildford

    Simply beautiful words - what more can I say?!!

  • Freya Cesare profile imageAUTHOR

    Freya Cesare 

    10 years ago from Borneo Island, Indonesia

    Mentalist Acer: Yes, it is very true! So you know how that's feel. Soooo awful! Being princess give people so many privilege, but with that, they also have so much responsibility and restraining, and in so many cases, have to grow become someone else under the name of nobility. I am so lucky because I was born in this era, while everything come by choice, and I can have myself before everything too late. Thank you, Mentalist Acer. ^^

  • Freya Cesare profile imageAUTHOR

    Freya Cesare 

    10 years ago from Borneo Island, Indonesia

    Dear Uriel, the poem is sad but not intended to be gloomy. That is part of my memory which happily already far behind me. I wrote it to show you that sadness indeed have many forms. In so many times different people put a hope over different things, which sometimes far from reality inside their own life. Ah, how simply if we can exchange unwanted reality to others who wanted it,while others did the same to us too! But life indeed will never that easy.

    But this Hub only the beginning. Tomorrow you will find another one. ^_^ You have to read it, ok? Or I will tell your Cat to bite you!

    I never really have love to Cat before. My parents against pet, mostly Cat. They taught me to considering Cat as dirty animal, just like Rat and can caused disease. But then I am totally grown up and realized that my parents just have too much unnecessary phobia. At that time I decided, once I have enough money to spend, I will buy that white and fluffy Anggora Cat, not because I like cat, but simply because that kind of Cat is really beautiful and I really love to touch animal fur. Hahaha

    But then I found my Baby Cat. She was too small to be stray. Maybe her mother moved her from somewhere and had no chance to take her again. She is so weak, hungry, dirty and not even able to eat hard food yet. I couldn't able to left her alone to die there so I took her home. I tricked my parents said that my youngest cousin is the one whose adopted her, but once we brought her home, I told them the Baby Cat is mine. LOL. 33 years old independent woman and still have to fight with parents over adopting a pet! Imagine how lame is that!

    Since that time she become the greatest friend for me. She is weak still, easy to get flu, but very active too. She used me as her bed, usually sleep on top of my tummy, chest, neck, anywhere suitable for her. LOL. And I brought her everywhere with me.

    People said the way I treat her is too much because she just a cat. I told them I don't know she is a cat, I thought she is my baby girl. Hahaha! So, am I as crazy as you right now? LOL

    You do have me in your facebook, dear. And I did sent you my YM. You didn't get it yet?

    Write for me as much as you like. There is no limitation in here. Hehehe. Until tomorrow, Uriel. Another Hub ready for you inside my saving. :D

  • Mentalist acer profile image

    Mentalist acer 

    10 years ago from A Voice in your Mind!

    Dear Freya,one does a little research to find the life of a typical princess crys as many tears as the nieve peasant under the Noble Guard.;)

  • Uriel profile image


    10 years ago from Lebanon

    lots of typing mistakes LOL i was in a hurry sorry :D:D:D:D:

  • Uriel profile image


    10 years ago from Lebanon

    Freya my enegentic friend,

    1- Hugs to you, i simply feel closer to you than before. I do love your words and sometimes i just feel like you are reading them to me in the back of my head.

    2- i was ready to forfeiting but i read your hub and i felt a smile on my face. Perhaps the poem is sad, but for some reason [ which i seem not to know] it brought a feeling of security [ who knows ]. i have to say i identify with the girl in the poem. [perhaps one day we can talk about all that:P]

    3- i didn't find the poem dark or depressing i don't know why but i felt its uplifting effect as i read it to the end. Perhaps it is your kitten and your soul poured on paper that made me smile . [ i have to say i have a really weak heart when it comes to cats. I simply melt when i hold them. Yes i am a cat lady ( at 19 :( ) and i really simply love them. I do understand when you talk about them meowing and giving you the eyes O_O which make you feel sorrowful :D But sometimes just a moment of peace with my cats makes the present much easier :D:D ~YEH crazy i know~

    But i have three cats (and one wild cat which has suffered lots of trouble ) tamashii (means soul in Japanese) is my fluffy orange and white cat, dragza in white and grey where as Ash is GREY from head to toe.

    Yet ash has this twin brother [who exactly looks like him and apparently they were coming in shifts to eat :D:D]

    All in all, back to the poem, i love it. It simply made me smile though i was almost going to cry right now in the library because the computer crashed with all my material on it and my usb earlier this day went crazy.

    I don't know if this falls under the COMMENT, but i just felt like writing it so :D:D:D

    Loved it and girl i hope i can add you on facebook or anything {msn, yahoo..} it would be glad to get in contact with you !

    hugs and Salam, May you always find peace and happiness my sister


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