ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Why Having Doctor Jekyll as a Roommate is a Bad Idea

Updated on April 25, 2013
Well, it's the other guy you need to worry about.
Well, it's the other guy you need to worry about. | Source

There has to be a better way to pay rent

It’s one of the biggest first steps you’ll take in your adult life.

You’ve decided to move out of your parents’ home and get a place of your own. It’s a rite of passage. You’re claiming your adulthood and starting your life. You’ve finally left the nest and will be flying on your own.

Or will you?

The biggest problem will always be paying the rent. Unless you have a great job with decent pay, you might need a little bit of help. Since you have decided you’re an adult, going back to Mom and Dad to help finance your independence kind of defeats the purpose. If you’re lucky you have a close friend who will be willing to be your roommate. That’s the ideal situation – until you realize the guy you’ve known for most of your life is an unbearable slob who, unbeknownst to you, has a habit of sleep yodeling.

Such things can ruin a friendship.

The alternative to living with a friend is to go through the more adventurous route of living with a complete stranger. In days past, people used to post an ad in the newspaper or work through a mutual friend who has a similar dilemma. Nowadays we use Craig’s List. You can either post something there or see if someone else has made a post which fits your heart’s desire.

The entire exercise of living with a known friend or working with Craig’s List is tantamount to the old game show “Let’s Make A Deal” with Monty Hall. When you go through the Internet to find a roommate you’ve decided that you don’t want to keep the money in your hand and you want to go for what’s behind “Door Number 3”.

So, when you see the post that reads, “Roommate wanted: Medical man seeking understanding roommate to share an apartment while dissecting the human soul. No pets, nonsmoker. Email at”, you may wish to exercise a bit of caution.

But then again, you must remember that real estate is expensive and doctors earn a bit of coin. What have you got to lose?

What You’ve Got to Lose

There are a plethora of natural problems that come with sharing a space with a medical man. We can all understand the stray beaker in the sink as well as the dangers of leaving a Bunsen burner lit in the middle of the night. When a man is driven to chemically separate the aspects of good and evil, he might lose focus on the everyday things.

You can let a lot of things pass when your roommate has such impeccable references and seems to be almost pathologically clean and innocent of all the evils around him. He’s a great conversationalist with tons of friends and interesting colleagues. You should consider it a blessing that such a neat individual has little chance of losing the one month security deposit.

However, getting a message about your roommate’s “friend”, Edward Hyde, who you’re supposed to offer any and all manner of hospitality, might be a bit of a strain. It’s also a bit intimidating when Hyde, a hulking brute, has a habit of coming into the apartment at all hours of the night and throws his white shirts with curious red, blood-like stains on them in your laundry bin.

Doesn’t he know about delicate washing and that they should be soaked first?

Edward Hyde may not have any respect for your stuff. And you’ve been told that when he calls you “a quivering piece of human filth” while finishing off the last of your grandmother’s home baked cookies, you should simply ignore him and make a note of it.

You may feel that the best thing to do is tell him that your cookies were clearly marked and that everything on the left side of the cabinet is yours and that everything on the right is Jekyll’s.

Material possessions are transient. Remember that as he’s urinating on your iPhone.

Having a friend with violent psychotic mood swings is a problem in any relationship. When that happens, you’ll need to remind your roommate that he’s responsible for his friends.

It’s a question of remembering that we all have friends in low places. It seems that Hyde is everything that Jekyll is not.

Collateral Damages

I know what you’re thinking. Sure, Doctor Jekyll has one really bad butt wipe friend, but at least he keeps neat.

Well, it’s true. As part of the nature of the beast, doctors, particularly surgeons, have to be somewhat meticulous. He’ll always keep his bathroom tidy, dust when he has to, picks up his clothes, and folds the towels.

Were that only true of his friend, Edward.

You should not be surprised if Edward is eating crackers on the couch and watching porn the night you decide to show your parents the new place. The volume will be pumped up and he’ll be in your robe, violating it. And while you insist that he keep the robe, you’ll find it back in your closet – unwashed.

You will also find where he’s been hiding his porn… in your DVD jackets – specifically in your Disney films. This is always something to be wary of when you take care of those nieces and nephews of yours.

Consequently, I mentioned that Doctor Jekyll’s bathroom will be immaculate. The main reason for this is that Edward's been using yours. A good rule of thumb is to keep your dental floss in a secure place and to never let your toothbrush out of your sight. Weekly bathroom cleanings can and will take hours longer than they have to.

You may also wish to finish any food you eat in one sitting. Cookies are particularly vulnerable to Edward’s shenanigans as chocolate flavored Ex-Lax can easily be overlooked as one of his special additives to your desserts.

Just remember that financial reimbursements from Doctor Jekyll cannot buy back the time you’ll spend in the poor man’s reading room nor will it buy enough therapist sessions once you’ve figured out where your toothbrush went.

Would you live with a monster if it meant living in a nice apartment?

See results

Final Words

Living with a doctor looks good on paper.

Chances are he’ll be making a high income and offer to introduce you to a new and better class of people. Unfortunately, this will not be true with Doctor Henry Jekyll. He and Edward Hyde are a package deal.

I recommend that should you ever realize how bad your living relationship is with your roommate, especially if it gets violent, antagonistic, or abusive that you should make plans to move out. After all, this is your home, too. If you can’t relax in your own home, then it really isn’t a home in any definition. Sure, you can claim that those four walls will shield you from the elements and the cold, but no amount of structure or temperature comfort can make up for a paranoid night where you’ll be on your guard against an unexpected attack.

Finding that one person to live with is much more than money, status, and a well decorated apartment. Once you realize you’ve been living with an abusive monster, you should pack up and leave.

And I’m not just talking about Edward.


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    No comments yet.


    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

    Show Details
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
    ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)