Degrees of Blonde

1. 60

   OLYHOOCHposted 11 years ago

   7 degrees of Blonde   
    
   FIRST DEGREE   A married couple were
   asleep when the phone rang   at 2 in the morning. The very blonde wife
   picked up the phone,   listened a moment and said "How should I know,
   that's 200 miles   from here!" and hung up.     The husband asked, "Who
   was
   that?"     The wife answered, "I don't know, some woman wanting to know if
   the coast is clear."     
   
   SECOND DEGREE   Two blondes are walking down the
   street. One notices a compact on the   sidewalk and leans down to pick it
   up. She opens it, looks in the mirror   and says, "Hmm, this person looks
   familiar."     The second blonde says, "Here, let me see!"     So, the
   first blonde hands her the compact.     The second blonde looks in the
   mirror and says, "You dummy, it's me!"     
   
   THIRD DEGREE   A blonde
   suspects
   her boyfriend of cheating on her, so she goes out and   buys a gun. She
   goes to his apartment unexpectedly and when she opens the door she finds
   him in the arms of a redhead. Well, the blonde is really angry. She opens
   her purse to take out the gun, and as she does so, she is overcome with
   grief. She takes the gun and puts it to her head.     The boyfriend yells,
   "No, honey, don't do it!!!"     The blonde replies, "Shut up, jerk, you're
   next!"   
   
   FOURTH DEGREE   A blonde was bragging about her knowledge of
   state capitals.   She proudly says, "Go ahead, ask me, ... I know 'em
   all."
       A friend says, "OK, what's the capital of Wisconsin ?"     The blonde
   replies, "Oh, that's easy .. it's W."     
   
   FIFTH DEGREE   Q: What did the
   blonde ask her doctor when he told her she was pregnant?   A: "Is it
   mine?"
      
   SIXTH DEGREE   Bambi, a blonde in her fourth year as a UCLA Freshman,
   sat in her US   Government class. The professor asked Bambi if she knew
   what   Roe vs. Wade was about.     Bambi pondered the question; then,
   finally, said, "That was the decision   George Washington had to make
   before he crossed the Delaware ."     
   
   SEVENTH DEGREE   Returning home from
   work, a blonde was shocked to find her house   ransacked and burglarized.
   She telephoned the police at once and   reported the crime. The police
   dispatcher broadcast the call on the radio, and a K-9 unit, patrolling
   nearby, was the first to respond.     As the K-9 officer approached the
   house with his dog on a leash, the blonde ran out on the porch, shuddered
   at the sight of the cop and his dog, then sat down on the steps. Putting
   her face in her hands, she moaned, "I come home to find all my possessions
   stolen. I call the police for help, and what do they do? They send me a
   BLIND policeman!"     OKAY, FORWARD THIS TO ANYONE ELSE   YOU MIGHT THINK
   NEEDS A LAUGH TODAY

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2. 0

   Home Girlposted 11 years ago

   Being a smart blonde I usually leave my door unlocked. Any burglar will try to open it, find it not locked, realise that there is nothing to steal (otherwise people would have locked it) and will peacefully walk away! Isn't it smart! I am thinking of leaving a message on the door: "Do not bother - nothing to steal here." 

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