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Extrovert among Introverts - How to Survive

Updated on September 15, 2013
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A Few Facts:

(If you find this to be negative, keep in mind that I am an extrovert..... )

Ignoring others is a natural tendency of the Introvert, as they do not find it easy, or rather necessary, to share their thoughts and feelings with others. They are brooders, contemplating their navels in silence. They do not need the opinions of others in order to make decisions. Somehow they manage to work it all out on their own and often, by the time they have 'worked it out', they no longer 'feel like' carrying it into effect.

They don’t know - or rather don’t care – whether their views on matters are in line with those of the extroverts. They enjoy the challenge of pinning them to their own frame of mind, contemplating the pros and cons. By doing all of this all on their own they generate the energy they need to survive.

The introvert generates energy in a state of social isolation, applying it however with the same diligence as the extrovert. An introvert can be just as outspoken as the extrovert, but they will seldom spend time justifying their statements. The introvert, as much as the extrovert, can be a remarkable leader and soul of a party.

Introverts tend to see extroverts as dominating, aggressive, overbearing, arrogant and offensive, while extroverts tend to see introverts as cold, reserved, negative, revengeful and snobbish.

The Extrovert

The extrovert generates energy in the presence of others. In solitude many of them survive by becoming writers of fiction. Creating fictive characters and events gives them the opportunity to generate the energy they need to survive. Or they listen to loud music, or make their own, in an effort to kill a silence that drains their energy.

Acceptance and approval of the crowd is important to the extrovert. For them pondering is tiresome; they need action; they need to be active and productive; they 'think and ponder on their feet'.

And this is but only a few facts about introverts and extroverts.

The Wall Between Us ~ Lyrics

The world I live in is an alien to you

The clock that ticks is slower
Than you have ever seen
What does it take to make it to your side
I'll just open this door on this wall and walk inside

The wall between us has been built up instead of down
But all it takes is trust and love to burn it to the ground

Things are very different on my side
Where temptation finds you, it grabs your neck
With nowhere left to hide
The sun will always fall and will never rise
Maybe one day I'll see this sight that has never hit my eyes

The wall between us has been built up instead of down
But all it takes is trust and love to burn it to the ground
The wall between us has left me in my cage
Ignoring it will bring a lonely death brought from age

What will it take for me to get you through this
The ignorance we've brought up front
Will benefit from our missing out.

Personal Experience:

I was born an extrovert. According to the most recent test I scored 75% on Extrovertedness. But this doesn't mean that I don't need time to be alone. Of course, I need time to rest and time for introspection. However, the time I need for this is about the same an introvert with a score of 75% on Introvertedness is able to be in the presence of other people.

I must admit that the older I get the more time I need to be alone. Perhaps I have enough energy in reserve, as I was for too many years an organizer of concerts, tours, meetings and all kinds of gatherings.

I am not able to generate energy in the company of an introvert. Because acceptance and approval are important to me, I please them by keeping my mouth shut. Without saying a word or moving a finger, they make me feel incompetent, unwelcome, unwanted and totally ineffective. Of course, this is never their intention. Fortunately, I have discovered a way to survive in their company: Keeping myself busy with one or the other creative task, such as cooking, baking, knitting and best of all, writing.

As a child and young adult, in fact until recently, I reacted on Introvertedness in a rebellious way. I would shock the introverts by talking too much or by draining them with loud music. I MADE them laugh; I MADE them talk; I MADE them enjoy the party.

And believe it or not, those introverts became my best friends. When they needed a 'break' they would sought my company. When they had to become against their wishes part of a crowd, they wanted to be with me as I was a trusted barrier between them and the crowd.


Extroverts and introverts ought to understand and respect each other. They could be the best of friends and even business partners and spouses when they simply give each other the required space to be themselves.

To my introvert friends: In spite of the fact that you so often make me feel incompetent and foolish, I honestly love you all.

© Martie Coetser (18 May 2012)

Copyright :: All Rights Reserved
Registered :: 2012-05-18 21:16:11 UTC
Title :: Confession of an Extrovert
Category :: Publication
Fingerprint :: 0ee6d2ee3c771b084a80d639c0886b5874287d821ea4f400672975bba0796eef

"Summer Garden" by Simon Howden @ FreeDigitalPhotos,net
"Summer Garden" by Simon Howden @ FreeDigitalPhotos,net

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