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Dealing with rude comment on social media

Updated on July 29, 2013

Unleashed

People who start fights in comments section

After reading and commenting on articles on Huffington Post, and being attacked for my opinions, I determined that I should try HubPages. To my chagrin, it seems like the verbally violent attackers, lurk on all social media. These people make it impossible to have a civil discussion with people civilly exchanging ideas and differing opinions. After I realized that this is the case, I returned to Huffington Post and other social media where I have online friends.

I recently read a Hub article on narcissists. As I read, I realized that perhaps these dramatic, emotional, and argumentative commentators might be suffering from antisocial and borderline personality disorders. No matter how kindly you comment or respond to their comments, they hit you with all caps and insults. Some are on the verge of saying, “Your mother wears combat boots!” Could it be that these are narcissists trolling under assumed identities? It is much easier to be unkind when one is using a moniker or “sock.”


Contributions to a discussion

You might be dealing with a narcissist

·There are some behaviors that could evidence narcissistic behavior. Here are some examples:

Believing that you're better than others

  • No matter what any one says they feel their answers are best and they are the authorities on the subject.

· Exaggerating your achievements or talents

  • They present credentials that may be fake or not really impressive at all.

· Failing to recognize other people's emotions and feelings

  • They do not care that you respond civilly and their responses are personal and not related to the topic.

· Expecting others to go along with your ideas and plans

  • They expect others to believe it just because they said it. (This is how people meet molesters and swindlers on line. Are they kidding!)

· Expressing disdain for those you feel are inferior

  • They call others stupid, ignorant or whatever they feel will insult others.

· Trouble keeping healthy relationships

  • They start arguments and seem to never make online friends

For more characteristics of a narcissist, go to the Mayo Clinic website: http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/narcissistic-personality-disorder/DS00652/DSECTION=symptoms

They will always be with us

We have a responsibility to be civil on social media

The best advice is to be responsible for your own behavior. One day your words may come back to haunt you. If you are unable to come up with intelligent, non-combative responses, ignore the person. Do not argue with a fool! When you do, it becomes hard to tell who the fool is.


Why do people argue and insult people in comments

Do you feel commenters who argue and use all caps are narcissists?

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Dealing with rude commenters on social media

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    • dianetrotter profile imageAUTHOR

      G. Diane Nelson Trotter 

      3 years ago from Fontana

      Thank you for stopping by fpherj48! You are so right. It is a little annoying when the you-know-whats get the runs.

    • fpherj48 profile image

      Paula 

      3 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

      Like saavy stated....If someone is abusive(unacceptable & unnecessary) they should be reported. Other than that though, Diane, I don't have an issue with people commenting in any manner they choose. If people need to make a point or vent, so be it. I don't have to agree.

      "Opinions" are like you-know-what...and we all have one!

      I have to say that 95% of our fellow writers (hubbers) are polite, respectful and down right nice people.

      No matter where we go in this world, there are always the A$$wipes.....just gotta deal with them, I guess..... it's not legal to drive them out to the middle of the desert and abandon them!! LOL....UP++++

    • dianetrotter profile imageAUTHOR

      G. Diane Nelson Trotter 

      3 years ago from Fontana

      KU37, we are all ignorant about at least one thing or two. If there were no ignorance, we would have no problems ... right! I am reading your article on the Spirals, Turrets and Toilets. It's taking me a little time because I never heard of the artist before plus I just took an online class about redesigning communities. Your pictures remind me of our class discussions. I love the designs. They are similar in abstractness to some of the contemporary designs we studied in the class.

    • KU37 profile image

      KU37 

      3 years ago

      Vanity of vanities, saith the Preacher, vanity of vanities; all is vanity Ecclesiastes 1:2

      Sometimes I wonder if Solomon had spent time online. I think he must have encountered some narcissists in his day. I try to remember his words whenever I submit anything online, even when I make anonymous submissions. Diane, you make a point about calling people names, in particular "ignorant". I am ignorant about many things, but it usually doesn't occur to me to make a point of it online. Pointing out that you are ignorant takes bravery.

    • msLarayne profile image

      msLarayne 

      5 years ago from New York, NY

      You're on point! Some people are going to do that regardless of any rational thinking. You simply cannot please everyone and in effect try your best not to take things personally and keep trucking!

    • profile image

      lovedoctor926 

      5 years ago

      Excellent hub. I totally agree with your points as I have also been attacked for having my own opinions.

    • dianetrotter profile imageAUTHOR

      G. Diane Nelson Trotter 

      5 years ago from Fontana

      Thank you savvy! I'm going to check out Dr. Rappaport myself. I've had to report one or two people myself.

    • savvydating profile image

      Yves 

      5 years ago

      Hi Diane Trotter. I just wanted to mention - for those who find themselves in the role of co-narcissist, Alan Rappaport Ph.D. has some good articles about this matter. Just Google his name (for anyone out there who is interested). The articles are in PDF form.

      As for your article, you are so right; it is actually impossible to have a conversation with a narcissist because they lack empathy. Thanks for writing about this subject. One other thing, if anyone becomes abusive, then we must always report them to Hubpages.

    • profile image

      newenglandsun 

      5 years ago

      Hello, I am better than others at explaining things.

      This is real metal music:

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jRzTB8SbwHk

      This is fake, wannabe, pretend, metal that is really deathcore B.S. crap:

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wB4LGeuv1ks

    • dianetrotter profile imageAUTHOR

      G. Diane Nelson Trotter 

      5 years ago from Fontana

      I had to report someone last week. Hubpages did not get back to me but the person hasn't posted in the usual places. I was hesitant but the person was way over the line. Thank you for your comments Express!

    • Express10 profile image

      H C Palting 

      5 years ago from East Coast

      Your hub provides useful info and reminders to all. Planks is right, often trolls on HP have not contributed much if anything to the discussion, to HP in terms of content, or any particular communities but they sure have time to offend or insult. Sometimes they've been banned, haven't learned their lesson, but come back and do the exact same things under an alias. Perhaps this is why some trolls have no content?

    • dianetrotter profile imageAUTHOR

      G. Diane Nelson Trotter 

      5 years ago from Fontana

      Thanks Planks! I don't think it gets as vicious as Huffington but some people can be pretty obnoxious. I'll admit I have made a few friends out of rude posters.

    • PlanksandNails profile image

      PlanksandNails 

      5 years ago from among the called out ones of the ekklesia of Christ

      You make some valid points. Continual emotional rants and insults that have nothing to do with the subject at hand is sign of preoccupation with personal issues, which include narcissism.

      A particular genre that you may find interesting and write about may be controversial, which may provoke pique commentary from others who firmly hold to a differing paradigm.

      I find here on Hubpages there are a lot of people who like to come and post insulting comments. When I peruse their profile page they have contributed nothing to that particular community, but simply come over and troll in an attempt to fill some empty void inside of them. They open up their own personal sewage pipe and try to spray their ad-hominem irrelevance everywhere.

      I have noticed that many of the stand-out rude commentators I have come across cease to exist on Hubpages after a season. This habit eventually catches up with them; their irrelevance becomes irrelevant.

    • dianetrotter profile imageAUTHOR

      G. Diane Nelson Trotter 

      5 years ago from Fontana

      Michele, they have to be truly unhappy people. It is hard working with people like this.

    • Michele Travis profile image

      Michele Travis 

      5 years ago from U.S.A. Ohio

      I have had that problem also. When it comes to politics you are either very right, or very wrong. Some hubs have had horrible comments. I have avoided those, people can be banned for that. People will even insult you, if you do not insult them, then tell you ( if you don't insult them back) that you can't prove anything. That is too bad, for them anyway, for some reason I feel sorry for them.

    • dianetrotter profile imageAUTHOR

      G. Diane Nelson Trotter 

      5 years ago from Fontana

      No problem April! It is not your fault. I didn't even see it until you responded. He was actually mild compared to some of my other encounters.

    • April Reynolds profile image

      April Reynolds 

      5 years ago from Arizona

      I am very sorry that this has happened to you on one of my hubs. Please forgive them and pray for them. Thank you for taking the time to read one of my articles. I appreciated your visit. I am sorry I was out of town and not able to respond any sooner, maybe this could have been avoided. -April

    • dianetrotter profile imageAUTHOR

      G. Diane Nelson Trotter 

      5 years ago from Fontana

      Thank you Mhatter! You are so right.

      Thank you Sommer! It's sad that we can't all share differing opinions and have fun.

    • SommerDalton profile image

      Sommer Dalton 

      5 years ago

      This is so true! Great hub with many real points. Loved it, voted up plus interesting and awesome!!

    • Mhatter99 profile image

      Martin Kloess 

      5 years ago from San Francisco

      Thank you for sharing your insight with us. I have found good commenting is kind of an art form.

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