Married Couple Marriage Tips to Help You Make Your Marriage Work
It is the wish of every married couple to see their love for each other grow stronger every day, and for the marriage relationship to grow healthier with each passing day so that their marriage can flourish.
What can a married couple do to have a great marriage? What are some of the things they must do on a regular basis to ensure that the marriage withstands the storms that will arise as time goes on?
Let us look at some of the strategies a couple can use to make their marriage work.
Make Time for Each Other
One thing a married couple can do to make their marriage work is to spend time in each other’s presence. This will help you to significantly strengthen the rapport between the two of you which will eventually help you to improve the love chemistry and, hence, help you to forge a closer and tighter relationship.
Moreover, the more time you spend with each other, the better you will understand your spouse, the better you will appreciate your husband or wife and the better you will be able to function as a team. When you can think and act as a cohesive unit, your chances of producing a fantastic relationship is brighter.
So, regularly, make a concerted effort to cook your favorite meals together, dance together, or sit in your sitting room and just talk about yourselves.
During these times, ensure that you switch off your phones or your computer so that you can give your spouse undivided attention. Furthermore, make sure you concentrate 100% on what your spouse is saying to you—do not let your mind wander. By acting in these ways, you will help your spouse to enjoy the little time he or she spends with you.
Maintain Strong Communication in Your Marriage
You must ensure that you open up to your spouse every day. Try to talk to each other for at least 20 minutes a day so that you can express your love for your spouse, tell him or her how you feel about them, find out how your spouse’s day went, how he or she is feeling, and whether your spouse has any worries and fears which are disturbing him or her. As you keep on doing this, you will experience a continued growth in love in your marriage.
Additionally, make it a point to share your feelings with your spouse when you are unhappy about something that happened at work, or about something untoward that your spouse may have said or done to you. This will help both of you to address misunderstandings and anger so that you can maintain the tranquility in the marriage.
Forgive Each Other
Research has shown that forgiving a spouse is crucial for the success of any romantic relationship.
So, you need to learn to forgive each other for the hurts that you will suffer at the hands of your spouse. Doing this will help to maintain the integrity and strength of the camaraderie and love connection between the two of you.
Consequently, you will continue to be close as a couple and that will increase the likelihood that you will continue to love each other.
On the other hand, unforgiveness will cause you to grow apart as a couple, and that will increase the likelihood that you may fall out of love with each other and divorce.
Be Generous Towards Each Other
Research has shown that when spouses show generosity towards one another it leads to a happy marriage. When there is happiness in a marriage, there is a greater chance that the marriage will stand the test of time.
So, do acts of kindness for your spouse regularly. Surprise your spouse with gifts from time to time. Give your spouse a massage at the end of the day when he or she is tired after a hectic day at work.
Additionally, put the needs and desires of your spouse ahead of your own needs and desires and you will both be happy in the marriage.
Watch Relationship Movies and Discuss Them Regularly
A study conducted by Rogge et al. in 2013 suggests that couples who watch relationship movies are more likely to have a stronger relationship than couples who do not engage in this activity.
When you watch couples in movies, it will make you more conscious of the way you are behaving in your own marriage. Consequently, you will pay attention to your own behavior in your marriage, especially the negative behaviors you put up, and you are more likely to work on your faults as a result.
- Therefore, plan this activity into your tight schedules. You may choose to spend Friday, Saturday, and Sunday evenings watching movies that have relationship themes, together.
- Afterwards, each spouse should write down the lessons he or she learned, and how he or she can relate the behaviors of the characters in the movie to how he or she is behaving in the marriage.
- Then, write down the negative behaviors which your spouse exhibits which irritate you, and vice versa. Exchange the sheets, discuss ways you can behave better towards your spouse, and take note of your spouse’s concerns so that you can work seriously on your weaknesses.
Focus On the Good Points of Your Spouse Often
Constantly remind yourself of the good character traits of your spouse and the good things your spouse does for you.
Ruminating on your spouse’s positive attributes often will help you to keep feeling tender and loving towards your spouse. Consequently, you will continue to show love to your spouse and your spouse is also likely to reciprocate with love and affection. As a result, you will be able to consolidate the love in the marriage.
On the other hand, focusing on the bad sides of your spouse often will make you feel bitter towards your spouse and you will magnify his or her faults as well as overact to insignificant differences and disagreements. Consequently, you may get irritated with your spouse often and that can lead to fights that can spell doom for your marriage.
Do Challenging Activities Together Often
Regularly, engage in activities together as a couple that will test your endurance and mental fortitude, and also make you work as a team.
For example, go mountain climbing together, run a marathon together, or go hunting together.
Engaging in these activities will teach you to work together as a team and also enable you to learn to face and battle challenges together. Consequently, you will develop the mindset, as a couple, that will make it easier for you to cooperate to solve problems and overcome challenges.
Subsequently, you will find it easier to accommodate each other and to cooperate to tackle the problems and challenges that will rear their ugly heads in your marriage. Consequently, there is a greater chance that you can maintain the stability of the marriage.
Express Your Love For Your Spouse Often
Tell Your Spouse How Much He or She Means to you Often
Remind your spouse of the love you have for him or her very often. Do this by saying the words “I love you” regularly or by showing acts of love such as making big sacrifices for your spouse.
When you act this way, your spouse will not feel that you are taking him or her for granted. So, your spouse will maintain his or her goodwill towards you and that will help to keep the love in the marriage strong.
You may say something such as this to your spouse regularly, “Isaac, I want you to know that you have been a bulwark in my life all these years. I don’t know what I would have done without your constant care and protection, the words of comfort and encouragement when I am down, the help you give me to take care of the kids, and the interesting conversations you engage me in. Thank you, darling. You are my treasure and for me you are worth more than millions of gold bars.”
Make Love Often
Sex is the fuel that lubricates the love in a marriage and helps to keep a marriage strong.
Therefore, try to make love at least three times in a week. Getting intimate often with help to continue drawing both of you closer together, you will keep thinking about your spouse throughout the day after making love, and that will increase the likelihood that you will remain faithful and true to your spouse.
Furthermore, try new and exciting things in the bedroom from time to time so that you can keep that aspect of your marriage interesting. Consequently, your spouse will look forward to every evening with you and that will give him or her an incentive to come home to you.
Attend Church Together
A study conducted by the Institute for Family Studies suggests that married couples who attend church together regularly have stronger relationships than couples who do not.
When you go to church together, you will experience positive, happy feelings after you listen to the inspiring sermons.
Consequently, you are more likely to resolve conflicts amicably, you will communicate better in the marriage, and you are more likely to please your spouse. Additionally, you are more likely to relate to your spouse in loving ways which will make your spouse also have stronger love feelings for you.
So, make it a habit to go to church together on worship days. Use the same car so that you can converse to deepen the rapport between the two of you as you go to church, sit next to each other on the pews, and read a common Bible so that you can build the unity between the two of you.
Pray Together Every Day
Research shows that prayer can impact positively on your marriage. For example, prayer will reduce the likelihood that your spouse will cheat on you. Consequently, you are more likely to maintain the love bond in the marriage and that can significantly increase the chances that the marriage will work.
So, every day, reverently intone a prayer such as this one, “Dear Heavenly Father, we thank You for bringing us together. We thank You for the love we share every day. Father, we commit our lives and our marriage into Your hands. Please help us to solve all problems that will arise in this relationship peaceably. Please help us to continue loving each other. Please help us to remain true to each other just as You show Your faithfulness for us every day. Help us to keep loving ourselves until the day you call one of us. Amen.”
As a married couple, if you spend quality time together every week, communicate effectively as lovers, forgive each often, show kindness to each other regularly, and involve the God of love in your marriage, your marriage will remain strong and it will stand the test of time.
Do you engage in challenging activities together in your marriage?
© 2017 Isaac Yaw Asiedu Nunoofio