- Gender and Relationships
Anger Can Destroy Everything Held Dear
Some things are better left unsaid!
“Anger is not a good communicator. Be mindful that words have the power to destroy all that is sacred to your heart. We cannot take anything back once it is spoken...ever”. By~Becky Jo Gibson~
I'd be willing to bet that you have said something in anger to a loved one. Perhaps it was only part true, or something you felt yet never actually said out loud. Your angry words caused a feeling of regret. Maybe not, maybe there was some relief gained from finally saying what you had been hold back. The regret perhaps came from wishing you had said it nicer. Or talked about the feelings rather than yell? Regardless, the words stated in anger did not assist in bettering your relationship or your communication with your loved one.
Your outburst no doubt caused confusion and pain for your loved one. Perhaps you touched a nerve. Struck an old wound that really caused pain. Angry words leave holes that cannot be repaired. \o matter how much we wish we could take something back, the fact is that we cannot. Once the words come out they take on a life of their own and can not be unheard.
The devastation that anger and resentment causes in relationships is without parallel. It takes seconds to destroy all that you hold dear. Angry words often cause a pain so deep that it can lead to the demise of trust, security and faith in a relationship. A few angry words and the spiral begins. Down, down, down goes those carefree moments when everything was without question. The pain caused by these words sets in the spirit of the recipient. Sucking the life out of the good things that sustained the love through hard times. Now there are only hard times inside. Oh, he or she may put on a happy face and trudge on not giving it another thought...forgiving their loved one. That is until a snag comes along. It can take any form, a strange look, forgotten dinner plans, tardiness, a tone in the voice. Then along comes that pain, up close and personal. Deep seeded by now it causes one to pause...to examine...to feel slighted yet another time. The situation causing it to slap them in the face is magnified...much more serious than it perhaps should be.
There is a solution. As my mother always said, "Think before you speak". Simple yet so hard to live this simple action. Forgiveness is not an easy thing to do yet it can be done. I find that to seek to relate rather than judge helps me in healing from a perceived slight from a loved ones tongue.
There have been times in my life that I would have been better off if I had held my tongue. At 51 years old I find it easier to think about what I say before I say it. I also find it easier to forgive. I find that I can identify a resentment and put it in its place. Away from me and my spirit. Life is what it is and people are people. Sometimes people make mistakes and if God can forgive, then who am I not to? Finding a place to put the pain can be challenging. Prayer is a good tool...
God Bless you and yours,
Becky Jo aka Inspired Hippy